ADULT: A person who has stopped growing at both ends and is now growing in the middle. BEAUTY PARLOR: A place where women curl up and dye. CANNIBAL: Someone who is fed up with people.
CHICKENS: The only animals you eat before they are born and after they are dead.
COMMITTEE: A body that keeps minutes and wastes hours.
DUST: Mud with the juice squeezed out. EGOTIST: Someone who is usually me-deep in conversation.
HANDKERCHIEF: Cold Storage.
INFLATION: Cutting money in half without damaging the paper.
MOSQUITO: An insect that makes you like flies better.
RAISIN: Grape with a sunburn.
SECRET: Something you tell to one person at a time.
SKELETON: A bunch of bones with the person scraped off.
TOOTHACHE: The pain that drives you to extraction.
TOMORROW: One of the greatest labor saving devices of today.
YAWN: An honest opinion openly expressed.
and last but not least!!
WRINKLES: Something other people have, similar to my character lines.
dave06 said
06:29 PM Sep 30, 2008
very good and so true
twobob said
08:01 PM Sep 30, 2008
Chemical analysis - woman
Posted: 3/19/2007 4:24:22 AM
ELEMENT: Women
SYMBOL: Wo
DISCOVERER: Adam
ATOMIC MASS: Accepted at 53.6kg, but known to vary from 40-200kg
OCCURRENCES: Copious quantities in all urban areas
PHYSICAL PROPERTIES:
1. Surface usually covered in painted film
2. Boils at nothing; freezes w/o known reason
3. Melts if given special treatment
4. Bitter if incorrectly used
5. Found in various states from virgin metal to common ore
6. Yields if pressure applied in correct places
CHEMICAL PROPERTIES:
1. Has great affinity for gold, silver, and a range of precious stones
2. Absorbs great quantities of expensive substances
3. May explode spontaneously w/o prior warning and for no apparent reason
4. Insoluble in liquids, but actively increases greatly in saturation of alcohol
5. Most powerful money reducing agent known to man
COMMON USES:
1. Highly ornamental, especially in sports cars
2. Can be a great aid to relaxation
3. Very effective cleaning agent
NannyMon said
08:30 PM Sep 30, 2008
Kids Vocabulary Building
Q - Name the four seasons. A - Salt, pepper, mustard and vinegar.
Q - Explain one of the processes by which water can be made safe to drink. A - Flirtation makes water safe to drink because it removes large pollutants like grit, sand, dead sheep and canoers.
Q - What does "varicose" mean? A - Nearby.
Q - What guarantees may a mortgage company insist on? A - If you are buying a house, they will insist that you are well endowed.
Q - What happens to your body as you age? A - When you get old, so do your bowels and you get intercontinental.
Q - What happens to a boy when he reaches puberty? A - He says goodbye to his boyhood and looks forward to his adultery.
Q - What is the fibula? A - A small lie.
Q - Give the meaning of the term "caesarian section." A - The caesarian section is a district in Rome.
Q - What is a terminal illness? A - When you are sick at the airport.
Q - What does the word "benign" mean? A - Benign is what you will be after you be eight.
ADULT:
A person who has stopped growing at both ends and is now growing in the middle.
BEAUTY PARLOR:
A place where women curl up and dye.
CANNIBAL:
Someone who is fed up with people.
CHICKENS:
The only animals you eat before they are born and after they are dead.
COMMITTEE:
A body that keeps minutes and wastes hours.
DUST:
Mud with the juice squeezed out.
EGOTIST:
Someone who is usually me-deep in conversation.
HANDKERCHIEF:
Cold Storage.
INFLATION:
Cutting money in half without damaging the paper.
MOSQUITO:
An insect that makes you like flies better.
RAISIN:
Grape with a sunburn.
SECRET:
Something you tell to one person at a time.
SKELETON:
A bunch of bones with the person scraped off.
TOOTHACHE:
The pain that drives you to extraction.
TOMORROW:
One of the greatest labor saving devices of today.
YAWN:
An honest opinion openly expressed.
and last but not least!!
WRINKLES:
Something other people have, similar to my character lines.
Chemical analysis - woman
Posted: 3/19/2007 4:24:22 AM
ELEMENT: Women
SYMBOL: WoDISCOVERER: Adam
ATOMIC MASS: Accepted at 53.6kg, but known to vary from 40-200kg
OCCURRENCES: Copious quantities in all urban areasPHYSICAL PROPERTIES:
1. Surface usually covered in painted film
2. Boils at nothing; freezes w/o known reason3. Melts if given special treatment
4. Bitter if incorrectly used
5. Found in various states from virgin metal to common ore
6. Yields if pressure applied in correct places
CHEMICAL PROPERTIES:
1. Has great affinity for gold, silver, and a range of precious stones2. Absorbs great quantities of expensive substances
3. May explode spontaneously w/o prior warning and for no apparent reason
4. Insoluble in liquids, but actively increases greatly in saturation of alcohol
5. Most powerful money reducing agent known to man
COMMON USES:
1. Highly ornamental, especially in sports cars2. Can be a great aid to relaxation
3. Very effective cleaning agentKids Vocabulary Building
A - Salt, pepper, mustard and vinegar.
A - Flirtation makes water safe to drink because it removes large pollutants like grit, sand, dead sheep and canoers.
A - Nearby.
A - If you are buying a house, they will insist that you are well endowed.
A - When you get old, so do your bowels and you get intercontinental.
A - He says goodbye to his boyhood and looks forward to his adultery.
A - A small lie.
A - The caesarian section is a district in Rome.
A - When you are sick at the airport.
A - Benign is what you will be after you be eight.
Gawd cant argue with any of the above