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Th 2 best divorce letters Ever written

Zoomtopz said
03:15 AM Oct 6, 2012

"Best Divorce Letter EVER Written

Dear Wife, Im writing you this letter to tell you that Im leaving you forever.

Ive been a good man to you for 7 years & I have nothing to show for it.

These last 2 weeks have been hell. ... Your boss called to tell me that you quit your job today &

that was the last straw. Last week, you came home & didnt even notice I had a new haircut,

had cooked your favorite meal & even wore a brand new pair of silk boxers.

You ate in 2 minutes, & went straight to sleep after watching all of your soaps.

You dont tell me you love me anymore; you dont want sex or anything that connects us as husband & wife.

Either youre cheating on me or you dont love me anymore; whatever the case, Im gone.

Your EX-Husband

...

P.S. dont try to find me. Your Sister & I are moving away to West Australia together! Have a great life!

Dear Ex-Husband Nothing has made my day more than receiving your letter.

Its true you & I have been married for 7 years, although a good man is a far cry from what youve been.

I watch my soaps so much because they drown out your constant whining & griping Too bad that doesnt work.

I DID notice when you got a hair cut last week, but the 1st thing that came to mind was You look just like a girl!

Since my mother raised me not to say anything if you cant say something nice, I didnt comment.

And when you cooked my favorite meal, you must have gotten me confused with My Sister,

because I stopped eating pork 7 years ago. About those new silk boxers: I turned away from you because the

$49.99 price tag was still on them, & I prayed it was a coincidence that my sister had just borrowed $50 from me that morning.

After all of this, I still loved you & felt we could work it out. So when I hit the lotto for 10 million dollars,

I quit my job & bought us 2 tickets to Jamaica But when I got home you were gone..

Everything happens for a reason, I guess. I hope you have the fulfilling life you always wanted.

My lawyer said that the letter you wrote ensures you wont get a dime from me. So take care.

Signed, Your Ex-Wife, Rich As Hell & Free!

P.S. I dont know if I ever told you this, but my sister Carla was born Carl. I hope thats not a problem."

Richo

Travel Bug said
06:50 AM Oct 6, 2012

Love it!!!

biggrin biggrin biggrin biggrin .......

jules47 said
02:11 PM Oct 6, 2012

Good one!!!

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Th 2 best divorce letters Ever written

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