1. A Halloween pumpkin has more teeth than your wife does.
2. You let your twelve-year-old daughter smoke at the dinner table in front of her kids.
3. You've been married three times and still have the same in-laws.
4. Jack Daniel's makes your list of 'most admired people.'
5. You wonder how service stations keep their restrooms so clean.
6. Someone in your family once died right after saying: 'Hey, watch this.'
7. You think Dom Perignon is a Mafia leader.
8. A ceiling fan once ruined your wife's hairdo.
9. You think the last words of Advance Australia Fair are: 'Carn the Maggies.'
10. You lit a match in the bathroom and your house exploded, right off its wheels.
11. The market value of your car goes up and down, depending on how much petrol is in it.
12. You have to go outside to get something from the fridge.
13. One of your kids was born on a pool table.
14. You can't get married to your sweetheart because there's a law against it.
15. You think 'loaded dishwasher' means your wife is drunk.
16. Your toilet paper has page numbers on it.
17. Your front verandah collapses and kills more than five dogs.
hokianga said
06:22 PM Apr 3, 2013
Hey!! So I am 52 and support collingwood am I classed a s great granny!!?? lol
spida said
05:21 PM Apr 4, 2013
No idea what sort of people are Collingwood supporters - an in-house Aus joke obviously. I am wracking my brains to see how I can change that and use it as an email to my Kiwi friends - very funny
Rip and Rosie said
01:51 AM Apr 8, 2013
Its a joke, Spida, although a bad taste joke. It seems many AFL (football) fans want anyone to win EXCEPT Collingwood. Now, Collingwood is without doubt a fine team, and has top class supporters, however, we find ourselves the butt of jokes and the target of fools. Mainly, this seems to spring from the fact that Collingwood was a working man's team, and rose above poverty and bias to become a very successful team. This is the opposite to teams from the "upper crust" wherein money was no object and top coaches and players were introduced with a healthy/generous bank balance. Now, in this modern age, things have changed, demographics differ and money is no object, but old prejudices die hard.
The OP posted an example of a joke, rude as it it, but a joke none the less.
My advice- don't change it, or use it. Let it sink into oblivion, as it should.
Rosie
p.s. All jokes come from supporters of teams beaten by us. In the last week that would be North Melbourne and Carlton.
Did not get it all - heres the rest
You know you're a Collingwood supporter when:
1. A Halloween pumpkin has more teeth than your wife does.
2. You let your twelve-year-old daughter smoke at the dinner table in front of her kids.
3. You've been married three times and still have the same in-laws.
4. Jack Daniel's makes your list of 'most admired people.'
5. You wonder how service stations keep their restrooms so clean.
6. Someone in your family once died right after saying: 'Hey, watch this.'
7. You think Dom Perignon is a Mafia leader.
8. A ceiling fan once ruined your wife's hairdo.
9. You think the last words of Advance Australia Fair are: 'Carn the Maggies.'
10. You lit a match in the bathroom and your house exploded, right off its wheels.
11. The market value of your car goes up and down, depending on how much petrol is in it.
12. You have to go outside to get something from the fridge.
13. One of your kids was born on a pool table.
14. You can't get married to your sweetheart because there's a law against it.
15. You think 'loaded dishwasher' means your wife is drunk.
16. Your toilet paper has page numbers on it.
17. Your front verandah collapses and kills more than five dogs.
It seems many AFL (football) fans want anyone to win EXCEPT Collingwood.
Now, Collingwood is without doubt a fine team, and has top class supporters, however, we find ourselves the butt of jokes and the target of fools.
Mainly, this seems to spring from the fact that Collingwood was a working man's team, and rose above poverty and bias to become a very successful team.
This is the opposite to teams from the "upper crust" wherein money was no object and top coaches and players were introduced with a healthy/generous bank balance.
Now, in this modern age, things have changed, demographics differ and money is no object, but old prejudices die hard.
The OP posted an example of a joke, rude as it it, but a joke none the less.
My advice- don't change it, or use it. Let it sink into oblivion, as it should.
Rosie
p.s.
All jokes come from supporters of teams beaten by us. In the last week that would be North Melbourne and Carlton.