There's some cruel humour going around England at the moment. The butt? Aussie cricketers of course!

-What do you call an Aussie with a bottle of Champagne? A waiter.
-What do you call a world-class Australian cricketer? Retired.
-What do you call an Australian who can hold a catch? A fisherman.
-Why can no-one drink wine in Australia at the moment? They haven't got any openers.
-What is the difference between Cinderella and the Aussies? Cinderella knew when to leave the ball.
-What does an Australian batsman who is playing in The Ashes have in common with Michael Jackson? They both wore gloves for no apparent reason.
-Who spends the most time on the crease of anyone on the Australian cricket team? The woman who irons their cricket whites.
-What's the height of optimism? An Aussie batsman putting on sunscreen.
-What do you call a cricket field full of Australians? A vacant lot.
-What's the difference between an Aussie batsman and a Formula 1 car? Nothing! If you blink you'll miss them both.
-What's the difference between Michael Clarke and a funeral director? A funeral director doesn't keep losing the ashes.
-The Australian bobsleigh team have asked the Aussie cricket team for a meeting. They want to ask their advice about going downhill so fast!