An old guy goes to hisdoctor for his physical and gets sent to the Urologist as a precaution.
When he gets there, he discovers the Urologist is a very pretty female doctor.
The female doctor says, "I'm going to check your prostate today, but this new procedure is a little different from whatyou are probably used to.
I want you to lie on yourright side,bend your knees, then while I check your prostate, take a deep breath and say,
'99'. The old guy obeys and says,
"99".
The doctor says, "Great",now turn over on your left side and again, while I repeat the check, take a deep breathand say,
'99".
Again, the old guysays,
'99'." The doctor said, Very good.
Now then, I want you to lie on your back with your knees raised slightly.
I'm going to check your prostate with this hand, and with the other hand I'm going to hold on to your penis to keep it out of the way.
Now take a deep breath and say,
'99'.
The old guy begins,
"One...
two
three" You don't stop laughing because you grow old. You grow old because you stop laughing!
Jay&Dee
JayDee said
07:30 AM Dec 9, 2013
Best Joke of the Year
One day in the future, George Bush has a heart-attack and dies.
He immediately goes to hell, where
The devil is waiting for him.
"I don't know what to do here,"
Says the devil. "You are on my
List, but I have no room for you.
You definitely have to stay here,
So I'll tell you what I'm going to
Do.. I've got a couple of folks here
Who weren't quite as bad as you.
I'll let one of them go, but you
Have to take their place. I'll even
Let YOU decide who leaves."
George thought that sounded
Pretty good, so the devil opened
The door to the first room.
In it was Ted Kennedy and a
Large pool of water. Ted kept
Diving in, and surfacing, empty
Handed.. Over, and over, and
Over he dived in and surfaced
With nothing. Such was his fate
In hell.
"No," George said. "I don't think
So. I'm not a good swimmer, and
I don't think I could do that all
Day long."
The devil led him to the door of
The next room.
In it was Al Gore with a sledge-
Hammer and a room full of rocks.
All he did was swing that hammer,
Time after time after time.
"No, this is no good; I've got
This problem with my shoulder.
I would be in constant agony if
All I could do was break rocks
All day," commented George.
The devil opened a third door.
Through it, George saw Bill
Clinton, lying on the bed, his
Arms tied over his head, and his
Legs restrained in a spread-eagle
Pose. Bent over him was Monica
Lewinsky, doing what she does
Best.
George looked at this in shocked
Disbelief, and finally said, "Yeah
Man, I can handle this."
An old guy goes to his doctor for his physical and gets sent to the Urologist as a precaution.
When he gets there, he discovers the Urologist is a very pretty female doctor.
The female doctor says, "I'm going to check your prostate today, but this new procedure is a little different from what you are probably used to.
I want you to lie on your right side,bend your knees, then while I check your prostate, take a deep breath and say,
'99'.
The old guy obeys and says,
"99".
The doctor says, "Great", now turn over on your left side and again, while I repeat the check, take a deep breath and say,
'99".
Again, the old guy says,
'99'."
The doctor said, Very good.
Now then, I want you to lie on your back with your knees raised slightly.
I'm going to check your prostate with this hand, and with the other hand I'm going to hold on to your penis
to keep it out of the way.
Now take a deep breath and say,
'99'.
The old guy begins,
"One...
two
three"
You don't stop laughing because you grow old.
You grow old because you stop laughing!
Jay&Dee
One day in the future, George Bush has a heart-attack and dies.
He immediately goes to hell, where
The devil is waiting for him.
"I don't know what to do here,"
Says the devil. "You are on my
List, but I have no room for you.
You definitely have to stay here,
So I'll tell you what I'm going to
Do.. I've got a couple of folks here
Who weren't quite as bad as you.
I'll let one of them go, but you
Have to take their place. I'll even
Let YOU decide who leaves."
George thought that sounded
Pretty good, so the devil opened
The door to the first room.
In it was Ted Kennedy and a
Large pool of water. Ted kept
Diving in, and surfacing, empty
Handed.. Over, and over, and
Over he dived in and surfaced
With nothing. Such was his fate
In hell.
"No," George said. "I don't think
So. I'm not a good swimmer, and
I don't think I could do that all
Day long."
The devil led him to the door of
The next room.
In it was Al Gore with a sledge-
Hammer and a room full of rocks.
All he did was swing that hammer,
Time after time after time.
"No, this is no good; I've got
This problem with my shoulder.
I would be in constant agony if
All I could do was break rocks
All day," commented George.
The devil opened a third door.
Through it, George saw Bill
Clinton, lying on the bed, his
Arms tied over his head, and his
Legs restrained in a spread-eagle
Pose. Bent over him was Monica
Lewinsky, doing what she does
Best.
George looked at this in shocked
Disbelief, and finally said, "Yeah
Man, I can handle this."
The devil smiled and said............
(This is priceless...)
"OK, Monica, you're free to go."