W hile conducting some business at the Courthouse, I overheard a lady, who 
had been arrested for assaulting a Mammogram Technician, say, "Your Honor, 
I'm guilty but, there were extenuating circumstances."
The female Judge said, sarcastically, "I'd certainly like to hear those 
extenuating circumstances."
I did too, so I listened as the lady told her story.
"Your Honor, I had a mammogram appointment, which I actually kept. I was met 
by this perky little clipboard carrier smiling from ear to ear and she 
tilted her head to one side and crooned, 'Hi! I'm Belinda! All I need you to 
do is step into this room right here, strip to the waist, then slip on this 
gown. Everything
clear?' "
I'm thinking, "Belinda, try decaf. This ain't rocket science." Belinda then 
skipped away to prepare the chamber of horrors.
With the right side finished, Belinda flipped me (literally) to the left and 
said, "Hmmmm. Can you stand on your tippy toes and lean in a tad so we can 
get everything?"
"Fine," I answered.
I was freezing, bruised, and out of air, so why not use the remaining 
circulation in my legs and neck to finish me off? My body was in a holding 
pattern that defied gravity (with my other breast wedged between those two 4 
inch pieces of square glass) when I heard and felt a zap!
Complete darkness, the power was off!
Belinda said, "Uh-oh, maintenance is working; bet they hit a snag."
Then she headed for the door.
"Excuse me! You're not leaving me in this vise alone are you?" I shouted.
Belinda kept going and said, "Oh, you fussy puppy;the door's wide open so 
you'll have the emergency hall lights. I'll be right back."
Before I could shout NOOOO! She disappeared.
And that's exactly how Bubba and Earl, maintenance men extraordinaire found 
me;half-naked with part of me dangling from the Jaws of Life and the other 
part smashed between glass!
After exchanging a polite "Hi, how's it going/" type greeting, Bubba (or 
possibly Earl) asked, to my utter disbelief, if I knew the power was off.
Trying to disguise my hysteria, I replied with as much calmness as possible, 
"Uh, yes, I did but thanks anyway."
"OK, you take care now" Bubba replied and waved good-bye as though I'd been 
standing in the line at the grocery store.
Two hours later, Belinda breezes in wearing a sheepish grin. Making no 
attempt to suppress her amusement, she said, "Oh I am sooo sorry! The power 
came back on and I totally forgot about you! And silly me, I went to lunch. 
Are we upset?"
And that, Your Honor, is exactly how her head ended up between the 
clamps...."
The judge could hardly contain her laughter as she said "Case Dismissed".
When you stop laughing, click on FORWARD and let the rest of who you sent it 
have a laugh!!!!