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Sign..
(Preview)
The boss was complaining in our staff meeting the other day that he wasn't getting any respect.Later that morning he went to a local sign shop and bought a small sign that read: "I'm the Boss!"He then attached it to his office door.Later that day when he returned from lunch, he found that someone had tap...
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aussie_paul
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0
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823
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Not another Irish joke..
(Preview)
Paddy was walking along the street in Belfast, when he sees a bomb. He takes a closer look and sees it is in fact a sandwich bomb. He decides to ring the army to report it. He says I have found a sandwich bomb just laying on the street"The chap on the other end asks "Is it ticking" to which Paddy replies "no, im...
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aussie_paul
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0
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806
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1970s
(Preview)
Were on a trip to Kentucky with Grandma and Grandpa. My cousin Randy and I, both 8 yrs old, get along really good and were easy for Grandma to handle. Grandpa stops at a small town diner for breakfast. Its not very busy. Grandma says we can sit in the booth behind them. We are feeling like big shots sitting b...
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aussie_paul
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0
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844
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A marble
(Preview)
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aussie_paul
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0
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794
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Room 858..
(Preview)
A hotel guest calls the front desk from his room on the eighth floor.The call is picked up by the clerk on the reception desk.The clerk answers,"May I help you?"The man says,"Yes, I'm in room 858""You need to send someone to my room immediately""What seems to be the problem sir?"Asks the clerk,"I'm ha...
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aussie_paul
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0
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711
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Metric vs Imperial
(Preview)
Some students were discussing the various merits of the metric and imperial systems of measurement. The first chap favoured imperial and said that he preferred the traditional imperial system and that 6 inches sounded quite impressive. The second chap said that 15 centimetres sounded far more...
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Whenarewethere
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1
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888
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Donald..
(Preview)
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aussie_paul
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3
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896
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Prostate..
(Preview)
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aussie_paul
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0
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775
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FINALLY..
(Preview)
A GOOD TRUMP JOKE THAT ALL WILL ENJOY!Donald is walking out of the White House and heading toward his limo, when a possible assassin steps forward and aims a gun.A secret service agent, new on the job, shouts "Mickey Mouse!" This startles the would be assassin and he is captured.Later, the secret serv...
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aussie_paul
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0
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766
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Cooking lesson..
(Preview)
Cooking lesson.One day a little girl was watching her mother make a roast beef. She cut off the ends, wrapped it in string, seasoned it and set it in the roasting pan.The little girl asked her mother why she cut the ends of the roast off.The mother replied, after some thought, that it was the way that her m...
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aussie_paul
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0
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603
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AVOCADOS..
(Preview)
Some wife jokes. AVOCADOSA wife asks her husband, "Could you please go shopping for me and buy one carton of milk and if they have avocados, get 6.A short time later the husband comes back with 6 cartons of milk. The wife asks him, "Why did you buy 6 cartons of milk"He replied, "They had avocados."If you'...
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aussie_paul
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0
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615
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Only in Campbelltown
(Preview)
Only in Campbelltown..... youre not going to believe what just happened we pulled up to get some fuel, and we noticed these two police officers watching a woman who was smoking while pumping petrol. I thought, "This Lady isnt the sharpest tool in the shed, and with the cops right there too.Anyway, I we...
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aussie_paul
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0
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586
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Dangerous..
(Preview)
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aussie_paul
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0
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627
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They call us "The Elderly"
(Preview)
We were born in the 40-50-60s.We grew up in the 50-60-70's.We studied in the 60-70-80's.We were dating in the 70-80-90's.We got married and discovered the world in the 70-80-90's.We venture into the 80-90s.We stabilize in the 2000s.We got wiser in the 2010s.And we are going firmly through and beyo...
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aussie_paul
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1
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799
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lol..
(Preview)
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aussie_paul
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0
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588
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How bad is what??
(Preview)
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aussie_paul
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0
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561
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Willis carrier..
(Preview)
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aussie_paul
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0
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610
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An old married couple..
(Preview)
An old married couple have just watched a documentary program about what happens to elderly people enduring a long and difficult decline towards death.Well, that makes you think, doesnt it dear? he says.Well what are you thinking? she asks.He sighs. Promise me that if ever I am dependent upon a mach...
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aussie_paul
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0
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685
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Never text a confession..
(Preview)
Never text a confessionTHE CONFESSIONHi Bob, This is Alan next door. Im sorry buddy, but I have a confession to make to you. I've been riddled with guilt these past few months and have been trying to pluck up the courage to tell you to your face, but I am at least now telling in text as I cant live with myself...
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aussie_paul
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0
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594
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t’s frightening true..
(Preview)
Its frightening true.Surgery- not joking much...Boy, if this doesn't hit the nail on the head, I don't know what does!..Two patients limp into two different medical clinics with the same complaint.Both have trouble walking and appear to require a hip replacement.The FIRST patient is examined wi...
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aussie_paul
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1
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733
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