|
Operation
(Preview)
This ageing man was on the operating table awaiting surgery and he insisted that his son, a renowned surgeon, perform the operation. As he was about to receive the anaesthesia he asked to speak to his son. "Yes Dad, what is it?" "Don't be nervous, son, do your best and just remember, if it doesn't go well...
|
fwdoz
|
0
|
612
|
|
|
|
|
Sex on Mars
(Preview)
Sex on Mars The year is 2222 and Charlie and Maureen land on Mars after accumulating enough Frequent Flier miles. They meet a Martian couple and are talking about all sorts of things. Charlie asks if Mars has a stock market, if they have laptop computers, how they make money, etc. Finally, Maureen brin...
|
Whenarewethere
|
0
|
815
|
|
|
|
|
Indian Taxi
(Preview)
Once a Chinese man went to Goa (India) for holidays. At the Airport he hired a taxi, driver was Pedro to take him to Panjim. On the way he saw a bus. He said - "The buses here are so slow and noisy .. In China the buses are very fast." At the Cortalim Bridge, the Chinese saw a train passing by on the railway bridg...
|
Possum3
|
1
|
807
|
|
|
|
|
Angus in Oz.
(Preview)
There was a young Scottish boy called Angus who decided to try life in Australia. He found an apartment in a small block and settled in. After a week or two, his mother called from Aberdeen to see how her son was doing in his new life. Im fine, Angus said. But there are some really strange people living in th...
|
Possum3
|
0
|
644
|
|
|
|
|
I'm this old.
(Preview)
From Dream RV Rental site
|
Possum3
|
2
|
773
|
|
|
|
|
Why?
(Preview)
I'm 80 and I have so many unanswered questions! I never found out who let the dogs out... The way to get to Sesame Street... Why Dora doesn't just use Google Maps... Why we don't ever see the headline "Psychic Wins Lottery"... Why women can't put on mascara with their mouth closed... Why "abbreviated"...
|
Possum3
|
2
|
795
|
|
|
|
|
masks
(Preview)
|
outlaw40
|
2
|
778
|
|
|
|
|
Lady does not like to wear a mask
(Preview)
I place this in the joke section, as I thought that it was a laughable encounter Usual disclaimer, the only legal words I know, is that an ill Eagle, is a sick bird, so my interpretation of what happened could be wrong Basically a lady was asked to wear a mask, while inside a Bunnings store The story is in th...
|
Tony Bev
|
3
|
1054
|
|
|
|
|
Covid funnies
(Preview)
|
Bobdown
|
2
|
631
|
|
|
|
|
Cartoons
(Preview)
|
Bobdown
|
0
|
801
|
|
|
|
|
Just married
(Preview)
|
Bobdown
|
0
|
681
|
|
|
|
|
How old?
(Preview)
Three old Grandmas were sitting on a bench outside the nursing home when an old Grandpa walked by. One of the old Grandmas yelled out, 'Hey, we bet we can tell... exactly how old you are!' The old man said, 'There is no way you can guess my age! One of the Grandmas said, 'Sure we can! Just drop your pants and u...
|
Possum3
|
0
|
745
|
|
|
|
|
One Better.
(Preview)
An Aussie bloke was having a coffee and croissants with butter and jam in a cafe when an American tourist, chewing gum, sat down next to him. The Aussie politely ignored the American, who, nevertheless started up a conversation. The American snapped his gum and said, 'You Australian folk eat the whol...
|
Possum3
|
0
|
623
|
|
|
|
|
Missed bus.
(Preview)
|
Possum3
|
1
|
856
|
|
|
|
|
Fancy Dress
(Preview)
A man with a bald head and a wooden leg is invited to a Xmas fancy dress party. He doesn't know what to wear to hide his head and his wooden leg, so he writes to a fancy dress company to explain his problem. A few days later he receives a parcel with a note: Dear Sir, Please find enclosed a Pirate's outfit. The s...
|
Possum3
|
0
|
655
|
|
|
|
|
Hypnotist
(Preview)
It was entertainment night at the Senior Citizens Centre & it was packed.. Claude the hypnotist explained: "I'm here to put you into a trance; I intend to hypnotize each and every member of the audience." The excitement was almost electric as Claude withdrew a beautiful antique pocket watch fro...
|
Possum3
|
0
|
740
|
|
|
|
|
Oldies.
(Preview)
Q: Where can single men over the age of 70 find younger women who are interested in them? A: Try a bookstore, under "Fiction".Q: What can a man do while his wife is going through menopause?A: Keep busy. If you're handy with tools, you can finish the basement. When you're done, you will have a place to liv...
|
Possum3
|
1
|
754
|
|
|
|
|
Proof that Jesus was Australian:
(Preview)
Proof : * He wore thongs. * He was a chippy, who like all good union members didn't work on Sundays. * His favourite past times were fishing, camping, going 4-wheel donkeying, and most of his mates were fishermen. * He seemed to know a lot of prostitutes.... * His mates all had nicknames: The Rock, The Dou...
|
Possum3
|
0
|
708
|
|
|
|
|
Cookbook recipe.
(Preview)
Two confirmed bachelors sat talking, their conversation drifted from politics to cooking. I got a cookbook once, said one. But I could never do anything with it. Too much fancy work in it, eh? asked the other. You said it. Every one of the recipes began the same way, Take a clean dish'
|
Possum3
|
0
|
766
|
|
|
|
|
Circle Flies.
(Preview)
A farmer got pulled over by a police officer for speeding. The officer started to lecture the farmer about his speed and began to throw his weight around, trying to make the farmer uncomfortable. Finally, the officer got around to writing out the ticket. As he was doing that he kept swatting at some fli...
|
Possum3
|
0
|
518
|
|
|
