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Miss Beatrice.
(Preview)
Miss Beatrice, the church organist, was in her eighties and had never been married. She was admired for sweetness and kindness to all. One afternoon the pastor went to check on her and she showed him into her quaint sitting room. She invited him to have a seat while she prepared tea. As he sat facing her o...
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Possum3
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0
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634
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Dr Anthony Fauci & Trumpy
(Preview)
goodness Dr. Anthony Fauci, Director of the U.S. National Institute of Allergy and Infectious Diseases told the President,Donald Trump : "This morning, 3 Brazilians were killed by Covid-19." Trump's face went egg-shell white with shock. The blood drained from his face and to everyones amazeme...
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Craig1
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0
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585
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Grandfather of the Year
(Preview)
again GRANDFATHER OF THE YEAR!! A woman in a supermarket is following a grandfather and his badly behaved grandson. He has his hands full with the child screaming for sweets, biscuits, and all sorts of things. The grandfather is saying in a controlled voice "Easy, Craig, we won't be long". Anot...
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Craig1
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0
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601
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Clever dog.
(Preview)
As a butcher is shooing a dog from his shop, he sees $10 and a note in his mouth, reading: 10 lamb chops, please. Amazed, he takes the money, puts a bag of chops in the dogs mouth, and quickly closes the shop. He follows the dog and watches him wait for a green light, look both ways, and trot across the road to a...
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Possum3
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0
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654
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Quick thinker
(Preview)
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Bobdown
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3
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883
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Baptizing Paddy
(Preview)
Paddy is stumbling through the woods, totally drunk, when he comes upon a preacher baptizing people in the river. He proceeds into the water, subsequently bumping into the preacher. The preacher turns around and is almost overcome by the smell of alcohol, whereupon, he asks him, "Are you ready to fi...
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Possum3
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0
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638
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Yorkshire pizza bar
(Preview)
Another take on the angry Scottish pizza guy......
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Bobdown
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0
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946
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Condom use on an aircraft
(Preview)
Condom use on an aircraftA man and a woman are seated next to each other on a flight. They start eyeing each other, and both realize they want to do the same thing. He slips a condom out of his pocket, and she looks delighted. "Rear toilet?" He suggests. "Five minutes", she agrees and goes off. He wait...
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JayDee
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1
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820
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Little boy & a Priest.
(Preview)
A little boy got on the bus, sat next to a man reading a book, and noticed that the man had his collar on backwards. The little boy asked the man why he was wearing his collar backwards... The man, who was a priest, said, 'I am a Father...' The little boy replied, 'My Daddy doesn't wear his collar like that.'...
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Possum3
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0
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759
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The electric fence and the lawnmower..
(Preview)
We have a 6 ft. Square tube and welded wire fence in the front yard, and last Saturday, when I heard some thieving Punks might be bringing their BS out to the country, I wanted to make sure they ran into a little resistance before meeting my 12 Gauge, so I got an electric fence and ran a single wire along the...
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Possum3
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5
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1251
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Bubba knows the Front of a Tree:
(Preview)
Bubba the Redneck from Georgia decides to travel across the south to Virginia to see God's country. When he gets to Franklin, he likes the place so much that he decides to stay. But first he must find a job: Bubba walks into an international paper company office and fills out an application as an experie...
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Possum3
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0
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663
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SENIOR TRYING TO RESET PASSWORD...
(Preview)
WINDOWS Please enter your new password USER cabbage WINDOWS: Sorry, the password must be more than 8 characters. USER: boiled cabbage WINDOWS: Sorry, the password must contain 1 numerical character. USER: 1 boiled cabbage WINDOWS: Sorry, the password cannot have blank spaces. USER: 50damnboil...
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Possum3
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0
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1025
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Now a quickie.
(Preview)
A turtle is crossing the road when hes mugged by two snails. When the police show up, they ask him what happened. The shaken turtle replies: I dont know. It all happened so fast.
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Possum3
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0
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623
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Mexican Fisherman
(Preview)
A businessman was standing at the end of the pier in a small coastal Mexican village when a small boat with just one fisherman docked. Inside the small boat were several large yellowfin tuna. The businessman complimented the fisherman on the quality of his fish and asked how long it took to catch them....
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Possum3
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0
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645
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Duplicate
(Preview)
-- Edited by Possum3 on Saturday 27th of June 2020 08:13:30 AM
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Possum3
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0
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792
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wise sayings
(Preview)
just sayin Wish I read these when I was younger... Confucius Say.... Kiss is merely shopping upstairs, For merchandise downstairs. Confucius Say. Better to lose a lover Than love a loser. Confucius Say. Man with broken condomOften called Daddy Confucius Say.Sex is sa...
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Craig1
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1
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811
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The Dog.
(Preview)
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Possum3
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3
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936
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Rubbish Collector.
(Preview)
A rubbish collector is driving along a street picking up the wheelie bins and emptying them into his compactor. He goes to one house where the bin hasn't been left out, and in the spirit of kindness after having a quick look about for the bin, he gets out of his truck goes to the front door and knocks, but th...
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Possum3
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1
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671
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Little Johnny and donkey
(Preview)
Little johnny arrived at school late, Teacher, whats your excuse this time, Johnny, my donkey got a broom handle stuck up it arse Teacher, its RECTUM Johnny, RECTUM it nearly bloody well killed him
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Cowboy7307
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0
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645
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Cannibals.
(Preview)
Five cannibals are employed by the Army as scouts and translators during one of the island campaigns during World War II. When the Commanding Officer welcomes the cannibals he says, "You're all part of our team now. We will compensate you well for your services, and you can eat any of the rations that t...
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Possum3
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3
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728
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