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Facts?
(Preview)
If you yelled for 8 years, 7 months and 6 days you would have produced enough sound energy to heat one cup of coffee. (Hardly seems worth it. The human heart creates enough pressure when it pumps out to the body to squirt blood 30 feet. (O.M.G.!) Banging your head against a wall uses 150 calories an hour (D...
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Possum3
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5
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1866
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Med Students.
(Preview)
Two medical students were walking along the street when they saw an old man walking with his legs spread apart. He was stiff-legged and walking slowly. One student said to his friend: Im sure that poor old man has Peltry Syndrome. Those people walk just like that. The other student says: No, I dont thin...
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Possum3
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0
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1089
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Snow White
(Preview)
Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs were roaming in the forest when they came across a lake. The water was enticing and Snow-White decided to take a bath. So she to...ld the Dwarfs to turn around while she prepared to take the bath: The Dwarfs protested vehemently and then Snow-White relented and said. "Af...
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Possum3
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0
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904
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Need a loan.
(Preview)
A woman walks into a bank in Sydney and asks for the loan officer. She says shes going to Europe on business for two weeks and needs to borrow $5,000. The bank officer tells her that the bank will need some kind of security for such a loan, so the woman hands over the keys to a new Rolls Royce thats parked on t...
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Possum3
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2
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1161
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a bad day
(Preview)
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Craig1
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0
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926
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God gives Adam a task
(Preview)
God says to Adam "I have something for you to do". Adam said "Gladly, Lord, what do You want me to do?" God said "Go down into that valley". Adam said "What's a valley?" God explained it to him. Then God said "Cross the River". Adam said "What's a river?" God explained that to him, and then said "Go over to th...
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fwdoz
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0
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948
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Fishing is important
(Preview)
Two fellas are fishing in a boat under a bridge. One looks up and sees a funeral procession starting across the bridge. He stands up, takes off his cap, and bows his head. The procession crosses the bridge and the man puts on his cap, picks up his rod and reel, and continues fishing. The other guy says, "Th...
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fwdoz
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0
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743
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Stutter.
(Preview)
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Possum3
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0
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930
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Pet Monkey
(Preview)
A guy walked into a bar with a monkey. The monkey grabbed some olives off the bar and ate them. Then he grabbed some sliced limes and ate them. He then jumped onto the pool table and grabbed one of the balls. To everyone's amazement, he stuck it in his mouth and somehow swallowed it whole. The bartender loo...
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Possum3
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1
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1115
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New Porsche
(Preview)
A man was reading the paper when an ad caught his eye. It announced, $50 Brand New Porsche! The man thought that it was very unusual to sell a Porsche for $50, but he decided it was worth a shot. He went to the address listed on the ad and was met by a woman in the driveway. She happily led him into the garage and...
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Possum3
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2
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1326
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Hallelujah
(Preview)
So I woke up , My dog is laying on the back patio covered in dirt with a rabbit in his mouth. The rabbit's not bloody, just dirty. My neighbor's kids raise blue ribbon rabbits. I instantly knew it was one of theirs. So I took the rabbit away from my dog, rushed inside, and washed all the dirt off it before my ne...
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Possum3
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0
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1046
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Room service.
(Preview)
An apartment guest called the front desk, and the clerk answered, "May I help you?" The guest said, "Yes, I'm in room 858. You need to send someone to the room,right away. I'm having an argument with my wife and she says she's going to jump out the window." The desk clerk said, "I'm sorry, Sir, but that's r...
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Possum3
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0
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1106
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Truth.
(Preview)
Ninety year old aboriginal elder sat in his humpy eyeing two government 'Welfare' officials sent to interview him . One official said to him: "You have observed the white man for 90 years. You have seen his wars and his technological advances. You have seen his progress and the damage he has done."The...
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Possum3
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0
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1214
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A Fart.
(Preview)
A fart it is a pleasant thing, It gives the belly ease, It warms the bed in winter And suffocates the fleas.... A fart can be quiet, A fart can be loud, Some leave a powerful, Poisonous cloud A fart can be short, Or a fart can be long, Some farts have been known To sound like a song. A fart can create A most curio...
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Possum3
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0
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800
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Tranny Fluid
(Preview)
Are we still allowed to say, "Tranny Fluid" or is it "Gender Neutral shifting fluid".
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skins
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1
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1006
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Words of wisdom
(Preview)
Women might be able to fake orgasms. But men can fake whole relationships. Sharon Stone Women need a reason to have sex. Men just need a place. Billy CrystalMy girlfriend always laughs during sex - no matter what she's reading. Steve JobsHockey is a sport for white men. Basketball is a sport for black m...
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rgren2
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0
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1030
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Hell.
(Preview)
Carl, Bob and Brett found themselves in Hell. They were a little confused at their current situation when they suddenly saw a door in the wall open, and behind it was perhaps the ugliest woman they had ever seen. She was short, dirty and you could smell her stench from far away. The voice of the Devil was h...
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Possum3
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0
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979
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New restaurant.
(Preview)
A group of friends went to a new restaurant and noticed that the waiter who took the order carried a spoon in his shirt pocket. It seemed a little strange. When another waiter brought the water and cutlery, one of the men noticed he also had a spoon in his shirt pocket. Then he looked around and saw that all...
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Possum3
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0
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791
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Super Sex
(Preview)
Just love how the Scottish accent gets mistaken...........
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Bobdown
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0
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926
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SCOTTISH 'Three Kick Rule'
(Preview)
A Glasgow lawyer went duck hunting in rural Aberdeenshire . He shot and dropped a bird, but it fell into a farmer's field on the other side of a fence. As the lawyer climbed over the fence, an elderly farmer drove up on his tractor and asked him what he was doing. The litigator responded, "I shot a duck and i...
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Possum3
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1
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897
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