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Oldie but a goodie..
(Preview)
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aussie_paul
|
0
|
606
|
|
|
|
Windy
(Preview)
An older lady was standing at the railings of a cruise ship, admiring the view. But the wind was strong and she had to hold on to her hat so that it would not blow off in the wind. A gentleman approached her and said: "Pardon me, Madam. I do not intend to be forward, but did you know that your dress is blowing up...
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Possum3
|
0
|
591
|
|
|
|
Insuring a tent.
(Preview)
Insurance company's are reminding campers that if their tent is stolen in the night they are not Covered.
|
Steve794
|
0
|
533
|
|
|
|
The Night Nurse
(Preview)
A very tired nurse walks into a bank, worn out after a tough shift. Preparing to write a cheque, she pulls a rectal thermometer out of her purse and tries to write with it. When she realizes her mistake, she looks at the flabbergasted teller, and without missing a beat, she says: "Well, that's grea...
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aussie_paul
|
0
|
715
|
|
|
|
Making Sense.
(Preview)
A Tennessee couple Dave and Edwina Kosmitus, both Bona Fide rednecks, had nine children. They went to see their Doctor to get Dave "Fixed". The Doctor asked them why had the come to the conclusion that they didn't want any more children. Dave said that they had read a recent article in the newspaper tha...
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Possum3
|
1
|
700
|
|
|
|
Risky???
(Preview)
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aussie_paul
|
1
|
686
|
|
|
|
Paddy & Mary
(Preview)
Paddy & Mary have been married for a long time & Mary decides their love life needs spicing up. She suggests to Paddy that they try a 69. Paddy agrees & Mary gets him to lay on the floor while she sits on his face. But just as she does, she farts. Mary apologises & tries again, but farts yet a...
|
fwdoz
|
1
|
676
|
|
|
|
lol...
(Preview)
|
aussie_paul
|
2
|
961
|
|
|
|
The Aussie BBQ routine....
(Preview)
|
aussie_paul
|
0
|
632
|
|
|
|
Why?
(Preview)
He turned to her, ran his hand up her thigh, across her belly and down her legs. When he turned back to watch the television, She asked "Why stop"? "Found the remote"! He replied.
|
Possum3
|
3
|
764
|
|
|
|
Swearing...
(Preview)
|
aussie_paul
|
1
|
921
|
|
|
|
Privacy..
(Preview)
|
aussie_paul
|
1
|
781
|
|
|
|
Low mileage
(Preview)
A blonde wanted to sell her car but she couldnt find any buyers. She called her friend for advice, and her friend asked how many kilometres she had on her car. She answered, 300,000. Her fried told her that was the problem. So the blonde went to the mechanic and told him to put it down to 70,000 kms. A couple...
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Possum3
|
1
|
853
|
|
|
|
Ancient skull....
(Preview)
|
aussie_paul
|
4
|
975
|
|
|
|
Johnny
(Preview)
Gday... A road crew supervisor hired Johnny to paint the line down the middle of a highway. He was sceptical about hiring him given he didnt have experience, but he said he really needed the job. He told Johnny he needed to complete 2km per day, then set him up with brushes and paint. After day one, the sup...
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rockylizard
|
2
|
854
|
|
|
|
Password
(Preview)
Gday... I was staying overnight at a hotel away from home. I took my computer down to the bar to do some data entry. I sat down at the bar and I asked the bartender, Whats the Wi-Fi password? you need to buy a drink first, he said. OK, Ill have a beer I said. He served me a beer and told me it was $`12. OK then, here...
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rockylizard
|
2
|
704
|
|
|
|
Lets go camping
(Preview)
The story is told of a lady who was rather old-fashioned, always quite delicate and elegant, especially in her language. She and her husband were planning a weeks vacation in Queensland, so she wrote to a particular campground asking for a reservation. She wanted to make sure the campground was full...
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fwdoz
|
2
|
587
|
|
|
|
Returning a package
(Preview)
A blonde woman strode angrily into the large store, slapped a package on the counter, and loudly expressed her dissatisfaction. The clerk asked "What's the problem? Wouldn't your cat eat them?" The blonde's eyes got very large, and she whispered "Do you mean to tell me that 'Pussy Treats' are for cat...
|
fwdoz
|
1
|
684
|
|
|
|
The Lawyer & the Engineer.
(Preview)
A lawyer and an engineer were fishing while on holiday and began talking. The lawyer said, Im here because my house burnt down and everything was destroyed by the fire. The insurance company paid for everything. Thats quite a coincidence, remarked the engineer. Im here because my house and all my bel...
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Possum3
|
0
|
690
|
|
|
|
Stutter
(Preview)
A really huge muscular guy with a bad stutter goes to a counter in a department store and asks "W-w-w-where's the m-m-m-men's dep-p-p-partment?"The clerk behind the counter just looks at him and says nothing.The man repeats himself: "W-w-w-where's the m-m-m-men's dep-p-p-partment?"Again, th...
|
fwdoz
|
0
|
755
|
|
|