|
Arsenic
(Preview)
A nice, calm and respectable lady went into the Pharmacy, walked up to the Pharmacist, looked straight into his eyes, and said, "I'd like to buy some cyanide." The Pharmacist asked, "Why in the world do you need cyanide?" The lady replied, "I need it to poison my husband." The Pharmacist's eyes grew b...
|
fwdoz
|
1
|
773
|
|
|
|
|
The Boss Leaves Early
(Preview)
Three girls worked in an office with the same female boss and each day they noticed that the boss left work early. One day the three decided that when their boss left, they would leave shortly after her. After all, she never came back to work so she would never know that they went home early too. The brune...
|
fwdoz
|
0
|
814
|
|
|
|
|
Mad Wife Disease
(Preview)
A guy was sitting quietly reading his paper when his wife walked up behind him and whacked him on the head with a magazine. "What was that for?" he asked. "That was for the piece of paper in your pants pocket with the name Laura Lou written on it," she replied. "Two weeks ago when I went to the races, Laura...
|
fwdoz
|
0
|
847
|
|
|
|
|
In the Confessional
(Preview)
An elderly Italian man who lived on the outskirts of Rimini, Italy, went to the local church for confession. When the priest slid open the panel in the confessional, the man said: "Father, during World War II, a beautiful Jewish woman from our neighborhood knocked urgently on my door and asked me to h...
|
fwdoz
|
0
|
757
|
|
|
|
|
David Thorne: The Lamp
(Preview)
This is something different; David Thorne uses sarcasm in his humour. You will either like it or you wont. If most you want more David Thorne, I will make him a weekly thing, if not, he will drop off into the abyss. Here is an example: David's neighbour has a bright lamp. From: Justin Flecker Date: Sunda...
|
fwdoz
|
8
|
1267
|
|
|
|
|
A short one
(Preview)
I hate perforated lines...........they're tearable.
|
Peterpan
|
1
|
664
|
|
|
|
|
It was there.
(Preview)
A husband and wife are travelling by car from Atlanta to New York. After almost 24 hours on the road, they are too tired to continue and decide to stop for a rest. They stop at a nice hotel and get a room, but they only plan to sleep for four hours and then get back on the road. When they check out four hours late...
|
Possum3
|
0
|
710
|
|
|
|
|
Just like Mom.
(Preview)
Thomas was single for a while and one day his friend asked, Why arent you married? Cant you find a woman who will be a good wife? Thomas replied, Actually, Ive found many women I wanted to marry, but when I bring them home to meet my parents, my mother doesnt like them. His friend thought for a moment and sai...
|
Possum3
|
0
|
634
|
|
|
|
|
Two sides to every story
(Preview)
Two women are having a coffee and catching up: So, how was your evening last night? A disaster! After getting home, my dear beloved hubby wolfed down in 4 minutes the dinner that took me all afternoon to prepare, "granted" me 3 minutes of passionate love before rolling over and falling asleep two minut...
|
fwdoz
|
1
|
785
|
|
|
|
|
Case Study
(Preview)
Sex Study... It has been determined that the most used sexual position for married couples is the doggie position. The husband sits up and begs. The wife rolls over and plays dead!
|
fwdoz
|
2
|
883
|
|
|
|
|
The Blonde & the BMW that only works during the day
(Preview)
A Blonde Bombshell buys the new Automatic BMW X8 sport. She drives the car perfectly well during the day, but at night the car just won't move at all. She tries driving the car at night for a week but still no luck. She then furiously calls the BMW dealers and they send out a technician to her. The technicia...
|
fwdoz
|
1
|
692
|
|
|
|
|
It works.
(Preview)
A man approached a very beautiful woman in a large supermarket and asked, You know, Ive lost my wife here in the supermarket. Can you talk to me for a couple of minutes? The woman looked confused and asked, Why? Because every time I talk to a beautiful woman my wife appears out of nowhere.
|
Possum3
|
1
|
694
|
|
|
|
More than a couple of jokes interrupt the flow of recent topics
(closed)
(Preview)
Ten or twelve jokes one after the other ruin the feed of recently active topics. Many of the jokes are quite funny but spread them over the week for the sake of the feed of the active topics. Thank you..
|
Dickodownunder
|
16
|
1167
|
|
|
|
|
Patrick & the punt
(Preview)
Patrick was a youthful and hard working Irishman at a Coastal village in Ireland. Daily he would pole a heavy old punt out to sea then work a heavy iron grapple to bring up the sand oysters which he sold to the local ice works. He was a man of regular habits he always arrived home each day at a certain time. Sa...
|
fwdoz
|
0
|
605
|
|
|
|
|
Vodka Xmas Cake Recipe
(Preview)
Once again this year, Ive had requests for my Vodka Christmas Cake recipe so here goes. 1 cup sugar, half pound butter, 1 tsp. baking powder, 1 cup water, 1 tsp. salt , 1 cup brown sugar, Lemon juice, 4 large eggs, Nuts, 1......bottle Vodka, 2 cups dried fruit 4 cups self raising flour. Sample a cup of Vodk...
|
fwdoz
|
0
|
1000
|
|
|
|
|
The Church Bulletin Bloopers
(Preview)
-------------------------- The Fasting & Prayer Conference includes meals. -------------------------- The sermon this morning: 'Jesus Walks on the Water.' The sermon tonight: 'Searching for Jesus.' -------------------------- Ladies, don't forget the rummage sale. It's a chance to...
|
fwdoz
|
0
|
928
|
|
|
|
|
First day of school
(Preview)
Roll call on the first day of school for 2018 Ahmed Al Sheriah ............................. ......"here" Mustafa Al Sheriah ............................. ....."here" Fatima El Bindihiri ............................. ......."here" Ali Acmah Shabeeb ................................
|
fwdoz
|
1
|
570
|
|
|
|
|
Puns for educated minds
(Preview)
The fattest knight at King Arthur's round table was Sir Cumference. He acquired his size from too much pi. 2. I thought I saw an eye doctor on an Alaskan island, but it turned out to be an optical Aleutian. 3. She was only a whiskey maker, but he loved her still. 4. A rubber band pistol was confiscated from a...
|
fwdoz
|
0
|
630
|
|
|
|
|
The Mens Shed Group
(Preview)
We had a novel experience at a recent meeting of our book club at the Men's Shed. One of our senior members, Ted Roberts who is himself an author lauded for his timeless work "Woodworking for Profit and Pleasure", came up with an interesting suggestion. He said his wife thought that we should read a book...
|
fwdoz
|
0
|
632
|
|
|
|
|
One Liners
(Preview)
When fish are in schools, they sometimes take debate. The batteries were given out free of charge. A dentist and manicurist married. They fought tooth and nail. A will is a dead giveaway. When you've seen one shopping center you've seen a mall. Acupuncture is a jab well done. That's the point of it. Whe...
|
fwdoz
|
0
|
511
|
|
|
