Just Joking

Possum3 · Possum3

An American visiting England asked the concierge where the elevator was in his hotel. The concierge looked a bit confused, but smiled when he realised what the man wanted. "You must mean the lift," he said. "No," the American responded. "If I ask for the elevator, I mean the elevator." "Well, over her...

Possum3 · Possum3

A thief was on trial for stealing a womans purse. The woman walked into the court room and immediately began pointing angrily at the thief. Thats him! She yelled, Thats him! Thats the man that stole my purse! I saw him clear as day. I would remember that face anywhere. The thief rolled his eyes at the wo...

Possum3 · Possum3

An older couple were walking on a beach when the husband tripped over a bottle and a genie came out. You can each have one wish, the genie said. The wife made her wish first: I would like to travel around the world, with my husband." Suddenly two tickets for travel around the world appeared in her hand . Nex...

Paintar · Paintar

A golfer in Ireland hooks his drive into the woods.. Searching for hisball, he finds a little Leprechaun lying flat on his back, a bump onhis head and golf ball beside him.Horrified, the golfer gets his water bottle from the cart and pours it over the little guy, reviving him.'Arrgh! What happened...

Paintar · Paintar

Two Australian rednecks were out hunting, and as they were walkingalong, they came upon a huge hole in the ground. They approached itand were amazed at its size.The first hunter said, "Wow, that's some hole. I can't even see thebottom. I wonder how deep it is."The second hunter said, "I don't know...

T1 Terry · T1 Terry

Authorities found a Nigerian man dead in his apartment surrounded by more than $17billon US in cash. Seems he'd been trying to give it away for yrs but no one would reply to his emails T1 Terry

Possum3 · Possum3

An airline introduced a half-price fare for women accompanying their husbands on business trips. Expecting valuable testimonials, the airline wrote to all of the wives whod used the special rate, asking them if they enjoyed their trip. Letters are still pouring in asking, What trip?

Possum3 · Possum3

Man driving up windy country road. Woman driving down windy country road. As cars pass each other woman yells out window; "PIG!" Man retorts "BITCH!" Man rounds next curve and the man crashes into a huge pig in the middle of the road, and dies. Thought for the day; IF MEN WOULD JUST LISTEN.

Possum3 · Possum3

An old man at the end of a jetty was selling seagulls $2.50 for one, or three for five bucks. A curious tourist approached him and said, Ill take one, please, before handing over his money. The old man pocketed the money, pointed up to the sky and said: See that one there? Thats your one.

fwdoz · fwdoz

Adam and Eve said "Lord, when we were in the garden, you walked with us every day. Now we do not see you anymore. We are lonesome here, and it is difficult for us to remember how much you love us".And God said "I will create a companion for you that will be with you and who will be a reflection of my love for you,...

fwdoz · fwdoz

Englishman, African and an Aussie sitting in a restaurant, waiting for their food. They're looking around the place and spot a man sitting by himself drinking water in the corner. After a few minutes they recognise him as Jesus Christ himself. They agree that he's a great bloke and all chip in to buy Je...

fwdoz · fwdoz

A mother and father took their 6-year-old son to a nude beach. As the boy walked along the beach, he noticed that some of the ladies had b**bs bigger than his mother's, and asked her why. She told her son "The bigger they are the dumber the person is".The boy pleased with the answer, goes to play in the ocea...

aussie_paul · aussie_paul

Two young boys walked into a pharmacy one day, picked out a box of tampons and proceeded to the checkout counter.The pharmacist at the counter asked the older boy, 'Son, how old are you?' 'Eight', the boy replied. The man continued, 'Do you know what these are used for?' The boy replied, 'Not exactly,...

aussie_paul · aussie_paul

A Texan visitor to England asked an Englishman to show him the biggest building in town.There it is, said the Englishman. Its quite impressive, I must admit.You call that big? scoffed the Texan. Back in Texas we have buildings just like that but over a hundred times bigger!Im not surprised, said the E...

Possum3 · Possum3

Little Johnny asked his grandfather a question that had been bothering him for a while. Grandpa, he said. Whats it called when there is someone on top of someone else in bed? The grandad felt very uncomfortable but decided to take the mature route and tell his grandson the truth, Well, thats called in...

rgren2 · rgren2

Martha recently lost her husband. She had him cremated and brought his ashes home.Picking up the urn that he was in, she poured him out on the patio table.Then, while tracing her fingers in the ashes, she started talking to him.You know that dishwasher you promised me?I bought it with the insurance mo...

Aus-Kiwi · Aus-Kiwi

Possum3 · Possum3

A woman returned from a fishing trip with her husband, who refused to speak to her the whole ride back. When they got home, she shared her troubles with a neighbour. I did everything wrong again, she said. I talked too loudly, I used the wrong bait, I reeled in to soon and I caught more than he did.

Possum3 · Possum3

A thirsty man walks into a bar and orders a beer. Suddenly he hears someone say: Hey! Nice tie! The man looks around to see who complimented him, but he couldnt see anyone. Hey! Nice shirt! Again, the man looks around but still cant see anyone. Hey! Nice suit! The man then called the bartender over to ask i...

Lesley F · Lesley F

https://youtu.be/m0ufUSVSyUc

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	UK vs USA. (Preview) An American visiting England asked the concierge where the elevator was in his hotel. The concierge looked a bit confused, but smiled when he realised what the man wanted. "You must mean the lift," he said. "No," the American responded. "If I ask for the elevator, I mean the elevator." "Well, over her...	Possum3	0	703	09:13 AM Sep 3, 2018 by Possum3
	Actually happened. (Preview) A thief was on trial for stealing a womans purse. The woman walked into the court room and immediately began pointing angrily at the thief. Thats him! She yelled, Thats him! Thats the man that stole my purse! I saw him clear as day. I would remember that face anywhere. The thief rolled his eyes at the wo...	Possum3	1	722	07:46 AM Sep 3, 2018 by Blues Man
	I wish. (Preview) An older couple were walking on a beach when the husband tripped over a bottle and a genie came out. You can each have one wish, the genie said. The wife made her wish first: I would like to travel around the world, with my husband." Suddenly two tickets for travel around the world appeared in her hand . Nex...	Possum3	1	758	07:45 AM Sep 3, 2018 by Blues Man
	The Leprechaun (Preview) A golfer in Ireland hooks his drive into the woods.. Searching for hisball, he finds a little Leprechaun lying flat on his back, a bump onhis head and golf ball beside him.Horrified, the golfer gets his water bottle from the cart and pours it over the little guy, reviving him.'Arrgh! What happened...	Paintar	1	700	07:44 AM Sep 3, 2018 by Blues Man
	Gear Box (Preview) Two Australian rednecks were out hunting, and as they were walkingalong, they came upon a huge hole in the ground. They approached itand were amazed at its size.The first hunter said, "Wow, that's some hole. I can't even see thebottom. I wonder how deep it is."The second hunter said, "I don't know...	Paintar	3	859	09:42 PM Sep 2, 2018 by Craig1
	And you thought you'd out smarted them (Preview) Authorities found a Nigerian man dead in his apartment surrounded by more than $17billon US in cash. Seems he'd been trying to give it away for yrs but no one would reply to his emails T1 Terry	T1 Terry	2	872	12:08 PM Sep 2, 2018 by Greg 1
	Half price fare. (Preview) An airline introduced a half-price fare for women accompanying their husbands on business trips. Expecting valuable testimonials, the airline wrote to all of the wives whod used the special rate, asking them if they enjoyed their trip. Letters are still pouring in asking, What trip?	Possum3	2	807	07:26 AM Sep 2, 2018 by Blues Man
	Short story. (Preview) Man driving up windy country road. Woman driving down windy country road. As cars pass each other woman yells out window; "PIG!" Man retorts "BITCH!" Man rounds next curve and the man crashes into a huge pig in the middle of the road, and dies. Thought for the day; IF MEN WOULD JUST LISTEN.	Possum3	1	775	08:07 AM Sep 1, 2018 by Blues Man
	Seagulls. (Preview) An old man at the end of a jetty was selling seagulls $2.50 for one, or three for five bucks. A curious tourist approached him and said, Ill take one, please, before handing over his money. The old man pocketed the money, pointed up to the sky and said: See that one there? Thats your one.	Possum3	1	692	08:06 AM Sep 1, 2018 by Blues Man
	Adam & Eve (Preview) Adam and Eve said "Lord, when we were in the garden, you walked with us every day. Now we do not see you anymore. We are lonesome here, and it is difficult for us to remember how much you love us".And God said "I will create a companion for you that will be with you and who will be a reflection of my love for you,...	fwdoz	1	731	08:03 AM Sep 1, 2018 by Blues Man
	Jesus & the pub meal (Preview) Englishman, African and an Aussie sitting in a restaurant, waiting for their food. They're looking around the place and spot a man sitting by himself drinking water in the corner. After a few minutes they recognise him as Jesus Christ himself. They agree that he's a great bloke and all chip in to buy Je...	fwdoz	1	623	07:59 AM Sep 1, 2018 by Blues Man
	Nude Beach (Preview) A mother and father took their 6-year-old son to a nude beach. As the boy walked along the beach, he noticed that some of the ladies had b**bs bigger than his mother's, and asked her why. She told her son "The bigger they are the dumber the person is".The boy pleased with the answer, goes to play in the ocea...	fwdoz	1	1136	07:58 AM Sep 1, 2018 by Blues Man
	Two young boys (Preview) Two young boys walked into a pharmacy one day, picked out a box of tampons and proceeded to the checkout counter.The pharmacist at the counter asked the older boy, 'Son, how old are you?' 'Eight', the boy replied. The man continued, 'Do you know what these are used for?' The boy replied, 'Not exactly,...	aussie_paul	2	748	07:57 AM Sep 1, 2018 by Blues Man
	Apologies to my Yank mates. (Preview) A Texan visitor to England asked an Englishman to show him the biggest building in town.There it is, said the Englishman. Its quite impressive, I must admit.You call that big? scoffed the Texan. Back in Texas we have buildings just like that but over a hundred times bigger!Im not surprised, said the E...	aussie_paul	2	1067	04:09 PM Aug 30, 2018 by Baggie
	What is it called? (Preview) Little Johnny asked his grandfather a question that had been bothering him for a while. Grandpa, he said. Whats it called when there is someone on top of someone else in bed? The grandad felt very uncomfortable but decided to take the mature route and tell his grandson the truth, Well, thats called in...	Possum3	2	716	07:39 AM Aug 30, 2018 by Blues Man
	BJ (Preview) Martha recently lost her husband. She had him cremated and brought his ashes home.Picking up the urn that he was in, she poured him out on the patio table.Then, while tracing her fingers in the ashes, she started talking to him.You know that dishwasher you promised me?I bought it with the insurance mo...	rgren2	2	796	07:37 AM Aug 30, 2018 by Blues Man
	A parking area for Dads with BBQ . (Preview)	Aus-Kiwi	1	605	02:20 PM Aug 29, 2018 by STRETCH ARMSTRONG
	Wrong again (Preview) A woman returned from a fishing trip with her husband, who refused to speak to her the whole ride back. When they got home, she shared her troubles with a neighbour. I did everything wrong again, she said. I talked too loudly, I used the wrong bait, I reeled in to soon and I caught more than he did.	Possum3	1	772	02:17 PM Aug 29, 2018 by STRETCH ARMSTRONG
	Compliment. (Preview) A thirsty man walks into a bar and orders a beer. Suddenly he hears someone say: Hey! Nice tie! The man looks around to see who complimented him, but he couldnt see anyone. Hey! Nice shirt! Again, the man looks around but still cant see anyone. Hey! Nice suit! The man then called the bartender over to ask i...	Possum3	0	599	06:33 PM Aug 28, 2018 by Possum3
	Warning the f word is mentioned. Message from Australians to Australian Parliament (Preview) https://youtu.be/m0ufUSVSyUc	Lesley F	3	595	03:17 PM Aug 28, 2018 by Phillipn
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