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Which One?
(Preview)
A man comes home from work and sees his wife on the bed with another man. He takes his gun and says to the other man: If you want my wife come take her from me like a man. I challenge you to a duel The other man accepts his challenge, they go to the other room and close the door. The husband tells the other man; Act...
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Possum3
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1
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937
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How do you want to go
(Preview)
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Woody n Sue
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0
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924
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Martin had just received his brand new driver license....
(Preview)
Martin had just received his brand new driver license. The family troops out to the driveway, and climbs in the car, where he is going to take them for a ride for the first time. Dad immediately heads for the back seat, directly behind the newly minted driver.Ill bet youre back there to get a change of sce...
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aussie_paul
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1
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854
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Crashed the Harley
(Preview)
While riding my Harley, I swerved to avoid hitting a deer, lost control and landed in a ditch, severely banging my head. Dazed and confused I crawled out of the ditch to the edge of the road when a shiny new convertible pulled up with a very beautiful woman who asked, "Are you okay?" As I looked up, I notice...
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sandman55
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1
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922
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Six old retired guys sat playing poker .........
(Preview)
Six old retired guys sat playing poker at Gerry's house one night when Rocco loses $600 in a single hand. At the shock of this he clutches his chest and drops dead from a heart attack. Tony says "Who's going to tell his wife." None of them want this horrible job so they cut the pack and the lowest card loses...
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Gaylehere
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0
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996
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'How long before I can get a haircut ?'
(Preview)
A Guy stuck his head into a barbershop and asked, 'How long before I can get a haircut ? The barber looked around the shop full of customers and said, 'About 2 hours.' The guy left. A few days later, the same guy stuck his head in the door and asked, 'How long before I can get a haircut ?' The barber looked arou...
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Paintar
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0
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848
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A university English creative writing class...
(Preview)
A university English creative writing class was asked to write a concise essay containing the following elements:1. Religion2. Royalty3. Physical Disability4. Racism5. HomosexualityThe prize-winner wrote:'My God,' cried the Queen, 'That one-legg...
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aussie_paul
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0
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1001
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A husband desperate to end an argument...
(Preview)
A husband desperate to end an argument offers to buy his wife a new car. She curtly declines his offer by saying, Thats not quite what I had in mind. Frantically he offers her a new house. Again, she rejects his offer, Thats not quite what I had in mind.Curious, he asks: What did you have in mind?She retor...
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aussie_paul
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3
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1028
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lol...
(Preview)
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aussie_paul
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0
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852
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Short Jokes
(Preview)
-A farmer in the field with his cows counted 196 of them, but when he rounded them up he had 200. -What's the best part about living in Switzerland? Not sure, but the flag is a big plus. -There was a prison break and I saw a midget climb up the fence. As he jumped down her sneered at me and I thought, well that's...
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fwdoz
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1
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1278
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Chicken
(Preview)
A guy asks his waiter how they prepare their chicken. The waiter says that there's nothing special... we just flat out tell' em they're gonna die...
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fwdoz
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0
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780
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Donald Joke
(Preview)
Donald Trump is walking out of the White House and heading toward his limo when a possible assassin steps forward and aims a gun. A secret service agent, new on the job, shouts Mickey Mouse! This startles the would be assassin and he is captured. Later, the secret service agents supervisor takes him...
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Tony Bev
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0
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753
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Bar
(Preview)
A bloke walks into a bar and orders 5 top shelf single malt whiskeys. The bartender lines them up and the bloke tosses them all back, bam!, one after the other in super quick time before the bartender has even put down the bottle. And the bartender is amazed and says to him "wow, I've never seen anyone ever...
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oldbloke
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0
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911
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sexual tension...
(Preview)
A big city doctor visits an Indian tribe full of men, he asks How do you guys relieve your s*xual tension?Simple, just come down to the river tomorrow and well show you.The next day the doctor shows up and sees a group of men near a donkey. One man says Since youre our guest you get to go first.The doctor not...
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aussie_paul
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1
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1119
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Cricket gone wrong.....
(Preview)
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kiwijims
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1
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923
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New Doctor
(Preview)
A young doctor had moved out to a small community to replace a retiring doctor. The older doctor suggested that the young one accompany him on his rounds so the community could become used to the new doctor.At the first house a woman complains "I've been a little sick to my stomach ". The older doctor say...
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fwdoz
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3
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1006
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Love Story
(Preview)
A LOVE STORY I will seek and find you. I shall take you to bed, and have my way with you. I will make you ache, shake & sweat until you moan & groan. I will make you beg for mercy, beg for me to stop. I will exhaust you to the point that you will be relieved when I'm finished with you. And, when I am finish...
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Paintar
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1
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979
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Management Lesson.
(Preview)
Johnny wanted to have sex with a girl in his office, But she belonged to someone else One day, Johnny got so frustrated that he went up to her and said, Ill give you a $100 if you let me have sex with you. But the girl said NO.... Johnny said, Ill be fast. Ill throw the money on the floor, you bend down, and Ill be...
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Possum3
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1
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1086
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Lady & the parrot...
(Preview)
A lady is walking down the street to work and she sees a parrot in a pet store. The parrot says to her, Hey lady, you are really ugly.Well, the lady is furious! And she storms past the store to her work. On the way home, she saw the same parrot in the window and the parrot said to her, Hey lady, you are really ugl...
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aussie_paul
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0
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969
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Senior Citizen
(Preview)
Yesterday my daughter emailed me again, asking why I didn't do something useful with my time."Like sitting around the pool and drinking wine is not a good thing?" I asked.Her talking about my "doing-something-useful" seems to be her favourite topic of conversation. She was "only thinking of me" sh...
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fwdoz
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2
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1028
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