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Car Problems
(Preview)
My wife came home yesterday and said "Honey, the car won't start, but I know what the problem is". I asked her what it was and she told me it had water in the carburettor. I thought for a moment, then said "You know I don't mean this badly, but you're not mechanically inclined. You don't know the carburetto...
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fwdoz
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1
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703
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Football Wedding
(Preview)
Two guys are talking about their boss's upcoming wedding. One says "It's ridiculous, he's rich, but he's 93 years old, and she's just 26! What kind of a wedding is that?" The other says "Well, we have a name for it in my family". "What do you call it?" "We call it a football wedding". The first asks "What's...
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fwdoz
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1
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666
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Missing Bike
(Preview)
A young pastor who normally rode a bike was walking despondently down the street when he came upon an older more experienced pastor.The older pastor could see his young friend was troubled deeply. "What is bothering you my son?" he asked. "Well it appears a member of my congregation has stolen my bike...
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fwdoz
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1
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704
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Christian Lion
(Preview)
Two guys are walking through a game park and they come across a lion that has not eaten for days. The lion starts chasing the two men. They run as fast as they can and the one guy starts getting tired and decides to say a prayer "Please turn this lion into a Christian, Lord". He looks to see if the lion is still...
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fwdoz
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0
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732
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Lost
(Preview)
I don't usually lose things but: when I do It's because the Wife has moved it!
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Possum3
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7
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1156
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Church Wedding?
(Preview)
Three couples are trying to get married at the same church. There is a young couple, a middle-aged couple, and an elderly couple. The three couples meet with the priest and discuss when they can get married. If you wish to get married in my church, you must all go one month without having sex, says the pri...
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Possum3
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0
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941
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The Pope & The Don
(Preview)
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LLD
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6
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928
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For Sale
(Preview)
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LLD
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1
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851
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In the spirit of things.
(Preview)
A boy is selling fish on a corner. To get his customers attention, he is yelling: Dam fish for sale! Get your dam fish here! A shocked pastor is passing and hears this. He asks: Why are you calling them dam fish?' The boy responds: Because I caught these fish at the local dam. So the pastor buys a couple fis...
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Possum3
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1
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858
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Logical.
(Preview)
I got chatting with a girl in a bar last night, "Can I buy you a drink?" I asked. "Don't you have a girlfriend?" she replied, "Guys like you always have girlfriends. ""No, sadly we broke up just over a month ago," I assured her. "Oh I'm sorry to hear that," she said, "Go on then, I'll have a Cider please.......
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aussie_paul
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2
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977
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Barnaby Joyce
(Preview)
Q: Are you aware of why Barnaby Joyce is like IKEA? A: One screw in the wrong place and the whole cabinet falls apart!
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fwdoz
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1
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866
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Pet Python
(Preview)
This blonde was selling her pet python on eBay. A bloke rang up and asked if it was big. She said "It's massive". He said "How many feet?" She said "None. It's a snake you idiot!"
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fwdoz
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1
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818
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The King
(Preview)
The king wanted to go fishing, and he asked the royal weather forecaster the forecast for the next few hours.The palace meteorologist assured him that there was no chance of rain.So, the king and the queen started out for their day of fishing. On the way, he met a man with a fishing pole riding on a donkey...
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fwdoz
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1
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911
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Little Johnny.
(Preview)
While playing in the backyard, Little Johnny kills a honeybee. His father sees him killing the honeybee and angrily says, "No honey for you for one month!" Later that afternoon, Johnny's dad catches him tearing the wings off a butterfly. "That's it! No butter for you for one month!" says his dad. Late...
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TheMonties
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1
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941
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Wabbits
(Preview)
A little girl goes into a pet shop and asks the owner for a Wabbit. The Owner thinks Oh what a cute little thing she is" and says to her "Would you like a White Wabbit, or this pretty little bwown wabbit or this gwey wabbit" She replies "Fwankly mister, I don't think Percy my pet Python gives a stuff what col...
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erad
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0
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771
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In Court
(Preview)
"So let me get this straight" the prosecutor says to the defendant. "You came home from work early and found your wife in bed with a strange man". "That's correct" says the defendant. "Upon which" continues the prosecutor "you take out a pistol and shot your wife, killing her". "That's correct" says t...
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fwdoz
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0
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885
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Italian wedding
(Preview)
A sweet and innocent Italian girl gets married, and the girls mother lives downstairs. The girl has never made love to a man before, and on their wedding night, when he takes off his shirt, she goes running downstairs. Momma, Momma, she cries. I cant believe it! He has hair all over his chest! What shoul...
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Possum3
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0
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677
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The wife said....
(Preview)
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aussie_paul
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1
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854
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Cutting
(Preview)
A teacher noticed that a little boy at the back of the class was squirming around, scratching his crotch, and not paying attention. She went back to find out what was going on. He was quite embarrassed but whispered that he had just recently been circumcised and he was quite itchy. The teacher told hi...
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rgren2
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1
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734
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Missing panties.
(Preview)
Two women went on a girls night out, and got slightly carried away with the ****tails. Drunk and walking home, they realised they both needed to pee. They were near a graveyard and one suggested they do their business behind a headstone. The first woman had nothing to wipe with, so she took off her pant...
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Possum3
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1
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898
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