Just Joking

fwdoz · fwdoz

Phil and Jill had been married for many years but now were in divorce court. Following a barrage of questions by both attorneys, questions came from a new source. The Judge asked "Phil, is it true that over the last three years of your marriage, you did not speak to Jill?" Phil replies "Yes, Judge, that i...

fwdoz · fwdoz

A man placed some flowers on the grave of his dearly departed mother and started back toward his car when his attention was diverted to another man kneeling at a grave. The man seemed to be praying with profound intensity and kept repeating "Why did you have to die? Why did you have to die?" The first man a...

aussie_paul · aussie_paul

Pastor, my dog is dead. Could there be a service for the poor creature?Pastor replied,No, we cannot have service for an animal in the church. But there is a new church down the road. Maybe they will do something for the animal.The man answeredPastor, but do you think they will accept a donation of $250,...

Possum3 · Possum3

A nervous little man walked into a grocery store in a small town. I want to buy all your over-ripe vegetables and stale eggs, he said. Well, said the shopkeeper with a twinkle in his eyes, You must be going to see the new comedian at the theatre tonight. Not so loud, said the little man, looking around hesi...

rgren2 · rgren2

A woman hears a knock on the door and when she opens the door a man asks this.Man: Do you have a vagina?Woman slams the door in disgustThe next morning she hears a knock again and answers the door. The man asks the same question Man: do you have a vagina?She slams the door again.Later that night when her hus...

Paintar · Paintar

For his birthday, little Joseph asked for a 10-speed bicycle. His father said, 'Son, we'd give you one,but the mortgage on this house is $280,000 and your Mothers just lost her job. There's no way we can afford it.' The next day the father saw little Joseph heading out the front door wi...

aussie_paul · aussie_paul

Aussie Paul.

Woody n Sue · Woody n Sue

aussie_paul · aussie_paul

A solider stationed in the South Pacific wrote to his wife in the States to please send him a harmonica to occupy his free time and keep his mind off of the local women. The wife complied and sent the best one she could find, along with several dozen lesson and music books.Rotated back home, he rushed to th...

Woody n Sue · Woody n Sue

kiwijims · kiwijims

Three men awaited execution by firing squad in the condemned cell, from which the site of their forthcoming ordeal could be clearly seen. The first, an Englishman, was taken out and stood against the wall. As the 5 man firing squad raised their rifles, he suddenly shouted "Avalanche!" at the top of hi...

aussie_paul · aussie_paul

The General went out to find that none of his G.I.s were there. One finally ran up, panting heavily.Sorry, sir! I can explain, you see I had a date and it ran a little late. I ran to the bus but missed it, I hailed a cab but it broke down, found a farm, bought a horse but it dropped dead, ran 10 miles, and now Im he...

aussie_paul · aussie_paul

My Mother wanted me to be a priest. Can you imagine giving up your sex life; and then once a week people come in to tell you the details and highlights of theirs? Aussie Paul.

Possum3 · Possum3

A business man is chatting with a hairdresser while shaving in a barbershop. At that time they see a child passing by the front of the door. The barber says, This kid is the most stupid child in the world. Let me show you; Jack, come here! Then the boy greets the barber with a silly grin. The barber gets a $ 1...

Possum3 · Possum3

The blonde is washing her cat. Her neighbor screams: What are you doing? You are gonna kill the cat! But the blonde ignores her neighbor. The next day, the blonde is very sad and her neighbor asks why. The blonde says My cat is dead. Her neighbor, Didnt I tell you not to wash it. The blonde, It didnt die wash...

Possum3 · Possum3

A mother-in-law has three sons-in-law. One day, they go on holiday together. The M.i.L jumps to the sea thinking which of my S.i.L loves me the most and pretends like she is drowning. Im drowning, please rescue me, my eldest S.i.L! and he saved her. Next day, the he gets a Ford Focus with a note on it: My...

Possum3 · Possum3

George is telling his friend the skills of his new parrot. My parrot is so intelligent. He speaks English if you pull his right foot and German if you pull his left foot. His friend asks George mockingly; What if I pull his both feet? George is speechless. At that moment, the parrot speaks; I would fall th...

Woody n Sue · Woody n Sue

-- Edited by Woody n Sue on Sunday 8th of April 2018 06:28:08 PM

aussie_paul · aussie_paul

Returning home a day early from an out-of-town business trip, a man caught a taxi from the airport shortly after midnight. On the cab journey, he confided to the driver that he thought his wife was having an affair. As they pulled up outside his house, the businessman asked the driver: Would you come in...

STRETCH ARMSTRONG · STRETCH ARMSTRONG

Senior couple watching TV as hubby sipped on his beveridge . He says "I never want to become a vegetable, dependent on a machine and fluids from a bottle to keep me alive!" SO She got up, pulled the TV power lead out of the socket and threw out his bottle of beer.

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	Divorce Court (Preview) Phil and Jill had been married for many years but now were in divorce court. Following a barrage of questions by both attorneys, questions came from a new source. The Judge asked "Phil, is it true that over the last three years of your marriage, you did not speak to Jill?" Phil replies "Yes, Judge, that i...	fwdoz	0	942	04:50 PM Apr 13, 2018 by fwdoz
	The cemetery (Preview) A man placed some flowers on the grave of his dearly departed mother and started back toward his car when his attention was diverted to another man kneeling at a grave. The man seemed to be praying with profound intensity and kept repeating "Why did you have to die? Why did you have to die?" The first man a...	fwdoz	0	802	04:48 PM Apr 13, 2018 by fwdoz
	My dog is dead.... (Preview) Pastor, my dog is dead. Could there be a service for the poor creature?Pastor replied,No, we cannot have service for an animal in the church. But there is a new church down the road. Maybe they will do something for the animal.The man answeredPastor, but do you think they will accept a donation of $250,...	aussie_paul	2	1167	11:39 AM Apr 13, 2018 by Leo
	New comedian. (Preview) A nervous little man walked into a grocery store in a small town. I want to buy all your over-ripe vegetables and stale eggs, he said. Well, said the shopkeeper with a twinkle in his eyes, You must be going to see the new comedian at the theatre tonight. Not so loud, said the little man, looking around hesi...	Possum3	0	1087	11:38 AM Apr 12, 2018 by Possum3
	Do you have a ? (Preview) A woman hears a knock on the door and when she opens the door a man asks this.Man: Do you have a vagina?Woman slams the door in disgustThe next morning she hears a knock again and answers the door. The man asks the same question Man: do you have a vagina?She slams the door again.Later that night when her hus...	rgren2	1	1029	04:56 PM Apr 11, 2018 by Blues Man
	10-speed bicycle (Preview) For his birthday, little Joseph asked for a 10-speed bicycle. His father said, 'Son, we'd give you one,but the mortgage on this house is $280,000 and your Mothers just lost her job. There's no way we can afford it.' The next day the father saw little Joseph heading out the front door wi...	Paintar	4	912	08:02 AM Apr 11, 2018 by Blues Man
	Friendship... (Preview) Aussie Paul.	aussie_paul	1	883	07:59 AM Apr 11, 2018 by Blues Man
	A happy dairy farmer (Preview)	Woody n Sue	1	916	07:57 AM Apr 11, 2018 by Blues Man
	Harmonica... (Preview) A solider stationed in the South Pacific wrote to his wife in the States to please send him a harmonica to occupy his free time and keep his mind off of the local women. The wife complied and sent the best one she could find, along with several dozen lesson and music books.Rotated back home, he rushed to th...	aussie_paul	1	909	07:56 AM Apr 11, 2018 by Blues Man
	Great news we’re all getting laid (Preview)	Woody n Sue	0	933	09:31 PM Apr 10, 2018 by Woody n Sue
	The mad Irishman.... (Preview) Three men awaited execution by firing squad in the condemned cell, from which the site of their forthcoming ordeal could be clearly seen. The first, an Englishman, was taken out and stood against the wall. As the 5 man firing squad raised their rifles, he suddenly shouted "Avalanche!" at the top of hi...	kiwijims	2	1133	08:11 PM Apr 10, 2018 by JA2340
	The General went out to find that none of his G.I.s were there.... (Preview) The General went out to find that none of his G.I.s were there. One finally ran up, panting heavily.Sorry, sir! I can explain, you see I had a date and it ran a little late. I ran to the bus but missed it, I hailed a cab but it broke down, found a farm, bought a horse but it dropped dead, ran 10 miles, and now Im he...	aussie_paul	0	1008	02:26 PM Apr 10, 2018 by aussie_paul
	My Mother wanted me to be a....... (Preview) My Mother wanted me to be a priest. Can you imagine giving up your sex life; and then once a week people come in to tell you the details and highlights of theirs? Aussie Paul.	aussie_paul	0	842	11:28 AM Apr 10, 2018 by aussie_paul
	Dumb Kid? (Preview) *A business man is chatting with a hairdresser while shaving in a barbershop. At that time they see a child passing by the front of the door. The barber says,* *This kid is the most stupid child in the world. Let me show you; Jack, come here!* *Then the boy greets the barber with a silly grin. The barber gets a $ 1...*	Possum3	0	778	11:12 AM Apr 10, 2018 by Possum3
	Blonde. (Preview) The blonde is washing her cat. Her neighbor screams: What are you doing? You are gonna kill the cat! But the blonde ignores her neighbor. The next day, the blonde is very sad and her neighbor asks why. The blonde says My cat is dead. Her neighbor, Didnt I tell you not to wash it. The blonde, It didnt die wash...	Possum3	0	813	11:08 AM Apr 10, 2018 by Possum3
	Mother in Law (Preview) *A mother-in-law has three sons-in-law. One day, they go on holiday together. The M.i.L jumps to the sea thinking which of my S.i.L loves me the most and pretends like she is drowning.* *Im drowning, please rescue me, my eldest S.i.L! and he saved her. Next day, the he gets a Ford Focus with a note on it: My...*	Possum3	0	887	11:06 AM Apr 10, 2018 by Possum3
	Another parrot. (Preview) George is telling his friend the skills of his new parrot. My parrot is so intelligent. He speaks English if you pull his right foot and German if you pull his left foot. His friend asks George mockingly; What if I pull his both feet? George is speechless. At that moment, the parrot speaks; I would fall th...	Possum3	0	779	11:03 AM Apr 10, 2018 by Possum3
	Good medical advice (Preview) -- Edited by Woody n Sue on Sunday 8th of April 2018 06:28:08 PM	Woody n Sue	8	1331	10:50 PM Apr 9, 2018 by madaboutled
	Returning home a day early...... (Preview) Returning home a day early from an out-of-town business trip, a man caught a taxi from the airport shortly after midnight. On the cab journey, he confided to the driver that he thought his wife was having an affair. As they pulled up outside his house, the businessman asked the driver: Would you come in...	aussie_paul	0	830	02:25 PM Apr 9, 2018 by aussie_paul
	Vegetable (Preview) Senior couple watching TV as hubby sipped on his beveridge . He says "I never want to become a vegetable, dependent on a machine and fluids from a bottle to keep me alive!" SO She got up, pulled the TV power lead out of the socket and threw out his bottle of beer.	STRETCH ARMSTRONG	2	1170	05:13 PM Apr 8, 2018 by Aus-Kiwi
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