Just Joking

sandman55 · sandman55

The GuillotineA Scotsman an Englishman and Paddy the Irishman were captured by the French at the time of the French revolution and were condemned to death by guillotine the following morning. The next morning the Scotsman was brought out first and was asked if he wanted to wear a blindfold and he re...

fwdoz · fwdoz

Merv was in a terrible accident at work. He fell through a floor tile and ripped off both of his ears. Since he was permanently disfigured, he settled with the company for a rather large sum of money and went on his way.One day, Merv decided to invest his money in a small, but growing telecom business call...

fwdoz · fwdoz

The local zoo had acquired a female of a very rare species of gorilla. Within a few weeks, the gorilla became very cantankerous and difficult to handle. Upon examination, the zoo veterinarian determined the problem - the gorilla was on heat! To make matters worse, there were no male gorillas of the sp...

fwdoz · fwdoz

Once there was a man who had just bought himself a brand new gun. Because of this, he decided to practice at a shooting range. There was one problem though - the range required a membership and the membership cost too much money for the man.So the man asked "I need to practice using this thing. What am I sup...

fwdoz · fwdoz

An Englishman, a Scotsman, an Irishman, a Welshman, a Latvian, a Turk, a German, an Indian, several Americans (including a Hawaiian and an Alaskan), an Argentinean, a Dane, an Australian, a Slovak, an Egyptian, a Japanese, a Moroccan, a Frenchman, a New Zealander, a Spaniard, a Russian, a Guatemal...

fwdoz · fwdoz

My neighbour went to the doctor complaining of a very difficult time achieving an orgasm. The doctor asked her "Which position do you use?" "Doggy-style" she replied. "Why don't you go home and, tonight, try it missionary position and see if that works any better" said the doctor. "We've tried that"...

fwdoz · fwdoz

Phil and Jill had been married for many years but now were in divorce court. Following a barrage of questions by both attorneys, questions came from a new source. The Judge asked "Phil, is it true that over the last three years of your marriage, you did not speak to Jill?" Phil replies "Yes, Judge, that i...

fwdoz · fwdoz

A man placed some flowers on the grave of his dearly departed mother and started back toward his car when his attention was diverted to another man kneeling at a grave. The man seemed to be praying with profound intensity and kept repeating "Why did you have to die? Why did you have to die?" The first man a...

aussie_paul · aussie_paul

Pastor, my dog is dead. Could there be a service for the poor creature?Pastor replied,No, we cannot have service for an animal in the church. But there is a new church down the road. Maybe they will do something for the animal.The man answeredPastor, but do you think they will accept a donation of $250,...

Possum3 · Possum3

A nervous little man walked into a grocery store in a small town. I want to buy all your over-ripe vegetables and stale eggs, he said. Well, said the shopkeeper with a twinkle in his eyes, You must be going to see the new comedian at the theatre tonight. Not so loud, said the little man, looking around hesi...

rgren2 · rgren2

A woman hears a knock on the door and when she opens the door a man asks this.Man: Do you have a vagina?Woman slams the door in disgustThe next morning she hears a knock again and answers the door. The man asks the same question Man: do you have a vagina?She slams the door again.Later that night when her hus...

Paintar · Paintar

For his birthday, little Joseph asked for a 10-speed bicycle. His father said, 'Son, we'd give you one,but the mortgage on this house is $280,000 and your Mothers just lost her job. There's no way we can afford it.' The next day the father saw little Joseph heading out the front door wi...

aussie_paul · aussie_paul

Aussie Paul.

Woody n Sue · Woody n Sue

aussie_paul · aussie_paul

A solider stationed in the South Pacific wrote to his wife in the States to please send him a harmonica to occupy his free time and keep his mind off of the local women. The wife complied and sent the best one she could find, along with several dozen lesson and music books.Rotated back home, he rushed to th...

Woody n Sue · Woody n Sue

kiwijims · kiwijims

Three men awaited execution by firing squad in the condemned cell, from which the site of their forthcoming ordeal could be clearly seen. The first, an Englishman, was taken out and stood against the wall. As the 5 man firing squad raised their rifles, he suddenly shouted "Avalanche!" at the top of hi...

aussie_paul · aussie_paul

The General went out to find that none of his G.I.s were there. One finally ran up, panting heavily.Sorry, sir! I can explain, you see I had a date and it ran a little late. I ran to the bus but missed it, I hailed a cab but it broke down, found a farm, bought a horse but it dropped dead, ran 10 miles, and now Im he...

aussie_paul · aussie_paul

My Mother wanted me to be a priest. Can you imagine giving up your sex life; and then once a week people come in to tell you the details and highlights of theirs? Aussie Paul.

Possum3 · Possum3

A business man is chatting with a hairdresser while shaving in a barbershop. At that time they see a child passing by the front of the door. The barber says, This kid is the most stupid child in the world. Let me show you; Jack, come here! Then the boy greets the barber with a silly grin. The barber gets a $ 1...

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	The Guillotine (Preview) The GuillotineA Scotsman an Englishman and Paddy the Irishman were captured by the French at the time of the French revolution and were condemned to death by guillotine the following morning. The next morning the Scotsman was brought out first and was asked if he wanted to wear a blindfold and he re...	sandman55	1	1001	01:26 AM Apr 15, 2018 by Blues Man
	Ears (Preview) Merv was in a terrible accident at work. He fell through a floor tile and ripped off both of his ears. Since he was permanently disfigured, he settled with the company for a rather large sum of money and went on his way.One day, Merv decided to invest his money in a small, but growing telecom business call...	fwdoz	2	992	11:20 PM Apr 14, 2018 by sandman55
	The Gorilla (Preview) The local zoo had acquired a female of a very rare species of gorilla. Within a few weeks, the gorilla became very cantankerous and difficult to handle. Upon examination, the zoo veterinarian determined the problem - the gorilla was on heat! To make matters worse, there were no male gorillas of the sp...	fwdoz	1	1086	08:20 AM Apr 14, 2018 by Blues Man
	Shooting Cans (Preview) Once there was a man who had just bought himself a brand new gun. Because of this, he decided to practice at a shooting range. There was one problem though - the range required a membership and the membership cost too much money for the man.So the man asked "I need to practice using this thing. What am I sup...	fwdoz	1	998	08:15 AM Apr 14, 2018 by Blues Man
	Fine Restaurant (Preview) An Englishman, a Scotsman, an Irishman, a Welshman, a Latvian, a Turk, a German, an Indian, several Americans (including a Hawaiian and an Alaskan), an Argentinean, a Dane, an Australian, a Slovak, an Egyptian, a Japanese, a Moroccan, a Frenchman, a New Zealander, a Spaniard, a Russian, a Guatemal...	fwdoz	0	1078	04:57 PM Apr 13, 2018 by fwdoz
	Doggy Style (Preview) My neighbour went to the doctor complaining of a very difficult time achieving an orgasm. The doctor asked her "Which position do you use?" "Doggy-style" she replied. "Why don't you go home and, tonight, try it missionary position and see if that works any better" said the doctor. "We've tried that"...	fwdoz	0	912	04:51 PM Apr 13, 2018 by fwdoz
	Divorce Court (Preview) Phil and Jill had been married for many years but now were in divorce court. Following a barrage of questions by both attorneys, questions came from a new source. The Judge asked "Phil, is it true that over the last three years of your marriage, you did not speak to Jill?" Phil replies "Yes, Judge, that i...	fwdoz	0	980	04:50 PM Apr 13, 2018 by fwdoz
	The cemetery (Preview) A man placed some flowers on the grave of his dearly departed mother and started back toward his car when his attention was diverted to another man kneeling at a grave. The man seemed to be praying with profound intensity and kept repeating "Why did you have to die? Why did you have to die?" The first man a...	fwdoz	0	836	04:48 PM Apr 13, 2018 by fwdoz
	My dog is dead.... (Preview) Pastor, my dog is dead. Could there be a service for the poor creature?Pastor replied,No, we cannot have service for an animal in the church. But there is a new church down the road. Maybe they will do something for the animal.The man answeredPastor, but do you think they will accept a donation of $250,...	aussie_paul	2	1197	11:39 AM Apr 13, 2018 by Leo
	New comedian. (Preview) A nervous little man walked into a grocery store in a small town. I want to buy all your over-ripe vegetables and stale eggs, he said. Well, said the shopkeeper with a twinkle in his eyes, You must be going to see the new comedian at the theatre tonight. Not so loud, said the little man, looking around hesi...	Possum3	0	1117	11:38 AM Apr 12, 2018 by Possum3
	Do you have a ? (Preview) A woman hears a knock on the door and when she opens the door a man asks this.Man: Do you have a vagina?Woman slams the door in disgustThe next morning she hears a knock again and answers the door. The man asks the same question Man: do you have a vagina?She slams the door again.Later that night when her hus...	rgren2	1	1070	04:56 PM Apr 11, 2018 by Blues Man
	10-speed bicycle (Preview) For his birthday, little Joseph asked for a 10-speed bicycle. His father said, 'Son, we'd give you one,but the mortgage on this house is $280,000 and your Mothers just lost her job. There's no way we can afford it.' The next day the father saw little Joseph heading out the front door wi...	Paintar	4	939	08:02 AM Apr 11, 2018 by Blues Man
	Friendship... (Preview) Aussie Paul.	aussie_paul	1	906	07:59 AM Apr 11, 2018 by Blues Man
	A happy dairy farmer (Preview)	Woody n Sue	1	943	07:57 AM Apr 11, 2018 by Blues Man
	Harmonica... (Preview) A solider stationed in the South Pacific wrote to his wife in the States to please send him a harmonica to occupy his free time and keep his mind off of the local women. The wife complied and sent the best one she could find, along with several dozen lesson and music books.Rotated back home, he rushed to th...	aussie_paul	1	936	07:56 AM Apr 11, 2018 by Blues Man
	Great news we’re all getting laid (Preview)	Woody n Sue	0	961	09:31 PM Apr 10, 2018 by Woody n Sue
	The mad Irishman.... (Preview) Three men awaited execution by firing squad in the condemned cell, from which the site of their forthcoming ordeal could be clearly seen. The first, an Englishman, was taken out and stood against the wall. As the 5 man firing squad raised their rifles, he suddenly shouted "Avalanche!" at the top of hi...	kiwijims	2	1167	08:11 PM Apr 10, 2018 by JA2340
	The General went out to find that none of his G.I.s were there.... (Preview) The General went out to find that none of his G.I.s were there. One finally ran up, panting heavily.Sorry, sir! I can explain, you see I had a date and it ran a little late. I ran to the bus but missed it, I hailed a cab but it broke down, found a farm, bought a horse but it dropped dead, ran 10 miles, and now Im he...	aussie_paul	0	1033	02:26 PM Apr 10, 2018 by aussie_paul
	My Mother wanted me to be a....... (Preview) My Mother wanted me to be a priest. Can you imagine giving up your sex life; and then once a week people come in to tell you the details and highlights of theirs? Aussie Paul.	aussie_paul	0	866	11:28 AM Apr 10, 2018 by aussie_paul
	Dumb Kid? (Preview) *A business man is chatting with a hairdresser while shaving in a barbershop. At that time they see a child passing by the front of the door. The barber says,* *This kid is the most stupid child in the world. Let me show you; Jack, come here!* *Then the boy greets the barber with a silly grin. The barber gets a $ 1...*	Possum3	0	803	11:12 AM Apr 10, 2018 by Possum3
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