Just Joking

fwdoz · fwdoz

A photon is going through airport security. The TSA agent asks if he has any luggage. The photon says "No, I'm traveling light". I'm currently dating a couple of anorexics. Two birds, one stone". "I picked up a hitch hiker. You've got to when you hit them". "As a kid I was made to walk the plank. We couldn'...

fwdoz · fwdoz

What's six inches long, two inches wide, and drives women wild? Money.

fwdoz · fwdoz

A prominent young attorney was on his way to court to begin arguments on a complex lawsuit when he suddenly found himself at the Gates of Heaven. St. Peter started to escort him inside, when he began to protest that his untimely death had to be some sort of mistake. "I'm much too young to die! I'm only 35!"...

fwdoz · fwdoz

The bathtub was invented in 1850. The telephone was invented in 1875. This might not seem like much, but if you had lived back then, you could have sat in the bathtub for twenty-five years without being bothered by the phone.

aussie_paul · aussie_paul

Aussie Paul.

fwdoz · fwdoz

Johnny's teacher is giving a lesson on nutrition, and she decides to ask her students what they had for breakfast. To add a spelling component, she asks the students to also spell their answers.Susan puts up her hand and says she had an egg "E-G-G" "Very good" says the teacher.Peter says he had toast "T...

Paintar · Paintar

A young woman walks into a Chartered accountant's office and tells him that she needs to file her tax Returns. The accountant says, 'Before we begin, I'll need to ask you a few questions.' He gets her name, address etc. and then asks, ' What's your occupation?' 'I'm a prostitute', she says. The account...

reikioz · reikioz

Question: Why do people have Armies? Answer: So they have somewhere to hang their Handies !

Cupie · Cupie

Does this fit for you ? Julie Andrews Turning 79 - this is hysterical! To commemorate her birthday , actress/vocalist, Julie Andrews made a special appearance at Manhattan's Radio City Music Hall for the benefit of the AARP. One of the musical numbers she performed was 'My Favourite Things' fr...

aussie_paul · aussie_paul

Aussie Paul.

Woody n Sue · Woody n Sue

Today a man knocked at my door and asked for a small donation towards a local swimming pool.. I gave him a glass of water. woody

aussie_paul · aussie_paul

A Winchester woman driving along at speed passed over a bridge only to find a cop with a radar gun on the other side lying in wait. The cop pulled her over, walked up to the car, with that classic patronizing smirk & asked, 'What's your hurry?'She replied, 'I'm late for work.''Oh yeah,' said the cop...

Aus-Kiwi · Aus-Kiwi

Cupie · Cupie

Just love this guy .. A bit controversial at times though.

Blues Man · Blues Man

One afternoon a lawyer was riding in his limousine when he saw two men along the roadside eating grass. Disturbed, he ordered his driver to stop and he got out to investigate. He asked one man, "Why are you eating grass ?" "We don't have any money for food," the poor man replied. "We have to eat grass." "We...

fwdoz · fwdoz

My wife came home yesterday and said "Honey, the car won't start, but I know what the problem is". I asked her what it was and she told me it had water in the carburettor. I thought for a moment, then said "You know I don't mean this badly, but you're not mechanically inclined. You don't know the carburetto...

fwdoz · fwdoz

Two guys are talking about their boss's upcoming wedding. One says "It's ridiculous, he's rich, but he's 93 years old, and she's just 26! What kind of a wedding is that?" The other says "Well, we have a name for it in my family". "What do you call it?" "We call it a football wedding". The first asks "What's...

fwdoz · fwdoz

A young pastor who normally rode a bike was walking despondently down the street when he came upon an older more experienced pastor.The older pastor could see his young friend was troubled deeply. "What is bothering you my son?" he asked. "Well it appears a member of my congregation has stolen my bike...

fwdoz · fwdoz

Two guys are walking through a game park and they come across a lion that has not eaten for days. The lion starts chasing the two men. They run as fast as they can and the one guy starts getting tired and decides to say a prayer "Please turn this lion into a Christian, Lord". He looks to see if the lion is still...

Possum3 · Possum3

I don't usually lose things but: when I do It's because the Wife has moved it!

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	One Liners (Preview) A photon is going through airport security. The TSA agent asks if he has any luggage. The photon says "No, I'm traveling light". I'm currently dating a couple of anorexics. Two birds, one stone". "I picked up a hitch hiker. You've got to when you hit them". "As a kid I was made to walk the plank. We couldn'...	fwdoz	0	641	03:58 PM Jun 15, 2018 by fwdoz
	What is? (Preview) What's six inches long, two inches wide, and drives women wild? Money.	fwdoz	0	706	03:44 PM Jun 15, 2018 by fwdoz
	The Pearly Gates (Preview) A prominent young attorney was on his way to court to begin arguments on a complex lawsuit when he suddenly found himself at the Gates of Heaven. St. Peter started to escort him inside, when he began to protest that his untimely death had to be some sort of mistake. "I'm much too young to die! I'm only 35!"...	fwdoz	0	752	03:43 PM Jun 15, 2018 by fwdoz
	Inventions (Preview) The bathtub was invented in 1850. The telephone was invented in 1875. This might not seem like much, but if you had lived back then, you could have sat in the bathtub for twenty-five years without being bothered by the phone.	fwdoz	0	744	03:41 PM Jun 15, 2018 by fwdoz
	Another lol.... :) (Preview) Aussie Paul.	aussie_paul	1	890	01:35 PM Jun 15, 2018 by rockylizard
	Little Johnny (Preview) Johnny's teacher is giving a lesson on nutrition, and she decides to ask her students what they had for breakfast. To add a spelling component, she asks the students to also spell their answers.Susan puts up her hand and says she had an egg "E-G-G" "Very good" says the teacher.Peter says he had toast "T...	fwdoz	7	1258	07:22 PM Jun 13, 2018 by JA2340
	Agricultural Income is tax-free. (Preview) A young woman walks into a Chartered accountant's office and tells him that she needs to file her tax Returns. The accountant says, 'Before we begin, I'll need to ask you a few questions.' He gets her name, address etc. and then asks, ' What's your occupation?' 'I'm a prostitute', she says. The account...	Paintar	0	777	04:13 PM Jun 13, 2018 by Paintar
	Question (Preview) Question: Why do people have Armies? Answer: So they have somewhere to hang their Handies !	reikioz	0	853	10:02 AM Jun 12, 2018 by reikioz
	A Few of my favourite things (Preview) Does this fit for you ? Julie Andrews Turning 79 - this is hysterical! To commemorate her birthday , actress/vocalist, Julie Andrews made a special appearance at Manhattan's Radio City Music Hall for the benefit of the AARP. One of the musical numbers she performed was 'My Favourite Things' fr...	Cupie	4	1160	07:33 PM Jun 11, 2018 by JA2340
	lol... (Preview) Aussie Paul.	aussie_paul	1	891	06:33 PM Jun 11, 2018 by Blues Man
	Door knocker (Preview) Today a man knocked at my door and asked for a small donation towards a local swimming pool.. I gave him a glass of water. woody	Woody n Sue	1	999	06:28 PM Jun 11, 2018 by Blues Man
	'A Rectum Stretcher!' (Preview) A Winchester woman driving along at speed passed over a bridge only to find a cop with a radar gun on the other side lying in wait. The cop pulled her over, walked up to the car, with that classic patronizing smirk & asked, 'What's your hurry?'She replied, 'I'm late for work.''Oh yeah,' said the cop...	aussie_paul	1	1068	06:26 PM Jun 11, 2018 by Blues Man
	Pick up hitchhiker ? (Preview)	Aus-Kiwi	2	859	07:56 PM Jun 10, 2018 by Woody n Sue
	My Pet Mud Crab (Preview) Just love this guy .. A bit controversial at times though.	Cupie	0	1056	10:26 AM Jun 10, 2018 by Cupie
	A HEART WARMING LAWYER STORY? (Preview) One afternoon a lawyer was riding in his limousine when he saw two men along the roadside eating grass. Disturbed, he ordered his driver to stop and he got out to investigate. He asked one man, "Why are you eating grass ?" "We don't have any money for food," the poor man replied. "We have to eat grass." "We...	Blues Man	0	712	07:49 AM Jun 10, 2018 by Blues Man
	Car Problems (Preview) My wife came home yesterday and said "Honey, the car won't start, but I know what the problem is". I asked her what it was and she told me it had water in the carburettor. I thought for a moment, then said "You know I don't mean this badly, but you're not mechanically inclined. You don't know the carburetto...	fwdoz	1	816	04:36 PM Jun 8, 2018 by Blues Man
	Football Wedding (Preview) Two guys are talking about their boss's upcoming wedding. One says "It's ridiculous, he's rich, but he's 93 years old, and she's just 26! What kind of a wedding is that?" The other says "Well, we have a name for it in my family". "What do you call it?" "We call it a football wedding". The first asks "What's...	fwdoz	1	783	04:34 PM Jun 8, 2018 by Blues Man
	Missing Bike (Preview) A young pastor who normally rode a bike was walking despondently down the street when he came upon an older more experienced pastor.The older pastor could see his young friend was troubled deeply. "What is bothering you my son?" he asked. "Well it appears a member of my congregation has stolen my bike...	fwdoz	1	808	04:32 PM Jun 8, 2018 by Blues Man
	Christian Lion (Preview) Two guys are walking through a game park and they come across a lion that has not eaten for days. The lion starts chasing the two men. They run as fast as they can and the one guy starts getting tired and decides to say a prayer "Please turn this lion into a Christian, Lord". He looks to see if the lion is still...	fwdoz	0	859	04:02 PM Jun 8, 2018 by fwdoz
	Lost (Preview) I don't usually lose things but: when I do It's because the Wife has moved it!	Possum3	7	1278	06:02 PM Jun 7, 2018 by JA2340
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