Just Joking

Yarra · Yarra

One day an Irishman, who has been stranded on a desert island for over ten long years, sees an unusual speck on the horizon."It's certainly not a ship," he thinks to himself. As the speck gets closer and closer, he begins to rule out the possibilities of a small boat, then even a raft.Suddenly, emerging...

Yarra · Yarra

Default Pope FrancisPope Francis recently finished his sermon. He ended it with the Latin phrase, "Tuti Homini" - Blessed be Mankind.. A Woman's Rights Group approached the Pope the next day.They noticed that the Pope blessed all Mankind, but not Womankind. So the next day, after his sermon, th...

Yarra · Yarra

He had several hundred young layers (hens), called 'pullets,' and ten roosters to fertilize the eggs.He kept records, and any rooster not performing went into the soup pot and was replaced.This took a lot of time, so he bought some tiny bells and attached them to his roosters.Each bell had a differen...

Yarra · Yarra

A farmer decided* he wanted to go to town and see a movie.The ticket agent asked, "sir, what's that on your shoulder?The old farmer said, "that's my pet rooster chuck.Wherever i go, chuck goes." "i'm sorry sir," said the ticket agent "we can't allow animals in the theater."the old farmer went around...

Yarra · Yarra

It said, "this is not working. I'm going to my mothers." I opened the door. The light came on. The beer was cold. Just what in the hell did she mean?

kiwijims · kiwijims

Two female teachers took a group of students from grades 1, 2 and 3 for a field trip to Flemington Racecourse. When it was time to take the children to the 'bathroom', it was decided that the girls would go with one teacher and the boys would go with the other. The teacher assigned to the boys was waiting...

Woody n Sue · Woody n Sue

Yarra · Yarra

A mother was working in the kitchen listening to her son playing with his new electric train in the living room. She heard the train stop and her son said, "All of you sons of bit..es who want to get off, get the hell off now, cause this is the last stop! And all you sons of bit..es who are returning and want to...

Magnarc · Magnarc

This bloke walks into a petshop and asks the attendant for a pet that requires absolutely no looking after. After a few moments the attendant tells him that they have a talking Centipede that does'nt need any attention. The bloke looks at him and says, "You're joking surely?" "Nope, its a fair dinkum t...

PeterD · PeterD

OK it did not wark -- Edited by PeterD on Sunday 23rd of October 2016 05:31:48 PM

Moorey · Moorey

*Pharmacist to customer:* *"Sir, please understand, to buy an anti-depression pill you need a proper prescription... Simply showing marriage certificate and wife's picture is not enough."* *A bookseller conducting a market survey asked a woman - "Which book has helped you most in your life? Th...

Woody n Sue · Woody n Sue

kiwijims · kiwijims

I called an old school friend and asked what was he doing. He replied that he is working on "Aqua-thermal treatment of ceramics, aluminium and steel under a constrained environment". I was impressed...... On further enquiring I learnt that he was washing dishes with hot water .......Under his...

Woody n Sue · Woody n Sue

Woody n Sue · Woody n Sue

Yarra · Yarra

A 68 year old woman told her friend over a bingo game that she wanted to have a baby. Her friend, in reasonable disbelief, laughed at her.The 68 year old woman retorted, "Well, I have the apparatus to and with today's technology, I can have a baby."And she did just that. She got pregnant and had a baby boy....

Yarra · Yarra

While not a brilliant scholar, was a gifted portrait artist.Over a short number of years, his fame grew and soon people from all over Ireland were coming to the town of Miltown Malbay, in County Clare, to get him to paint their likenesses.One day, a beautiful young English woman arrived at his house in...

Yarra · Yarra

A guy sits at a bar in a skyscraper restaurant high above the city. He slams a shot of tequila, goes over to the window and jumps out. The guy sitting next to him can't believe what he just saw. He's more surprised when, 10 minutes later, the same guy walks back into the bar and sits down next to him. The ast...

Yarra · Yarra

Six retired Irishmen were playing poker in O'Leary's apartment when Paddy Murphy loses 500 on a single hand, clutches his chest and drops dead at the table. Showing respect for their fallen brother, the other five continue play standing until Michael O'Connor looks around and asks, "Ok, me lads, s...

Aus-Kiwi · Aus-Kiwi

Have we changed much ?

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	7 years Stranded Irishman (Preview) One day an Irishman, who has been stranded on a desert island for over ten long years, sees an unusual speck on the horizon."It's certainly not a ship," he thinks to himself. As the speck gets closer and closer, he begins to rule out the possibilities of a small boat, then even a raft.Suddenly, emerging...	Yarra	1	1071	07:15 AM Nov 4, 2016 by Blues Man
	Pope Francis (Preview) Default Pope FrancisPope Francis recently finished his sermon. He ended it with the Latin phrase, "Tuti Homini" - Blessed be Mankind.. A Woman's Rights Group approached the Pope the next day.They noticed that the Pope blessed all Mankind, but not Womankind. So the next day, after his sermon, th...	Yarra	3	960	02:28 AM Nov 4, 2016 by Joe50
	Old Butch (Preview) He had several hundred young layers (hens), called 'pullets,' and ten roosters to fertilize the eggs.He kept records, and any rooster not performing went into the soup pot and was replaced.This took a lot of time, so he bought some tiny bells and attached them to his roosters.Each bell had a differen...	Yarra	1	1161	12:36 AM Oct 31, 2016 by Bryan
	The Farmer. Oldie But A Goodie (Preview) A farmer decided* he wanted to go to town and see a movie.The ticket agent asked, "sir, what's that on your shoulder?The old farmer said, "that's my pet rooster chuck.Wherever i go, chuck goes." "i'm sorry sir," said the ticket agent "we can't allow animals in the theater."the old farmer went around...	Yarra	0	1015	08:54 AM Oct 28, 2016 by Yarra
	My girlfriend left a note on the fridge door (Preview) It said, "this is not working. I'm going to my mothers." I opened the door. The light came on. The beer was cold. Just what in the hell did she mean?	Yarra	0	1136	11:34 AM Oct 27, 2016 by Yarra
	A Day At The Horse Races.... (Preview) Two female teachers took a group of students from grades 1, 2 and 3 for a field trip to Flemington Racecourse. When it was time to take the children to the 'bathroom', it was decided that the girls would go with one teacher and the boys would go with the other. The teacher assigned to the boys was waiting...	kiwijims	2	1053	11:24 PM Oct 26, 2016 by kiwijims
	There is a new roll on deodorant out (Preview)	Woody n Sue	0	987	07:08 AM Oct 25, 2016 by Woody n Sue
	Train Departure (Preview) A mother was working in the kitchen listening to her son playing with his new electric train in the living room. She heard the train stop and her son said, "All of you sons of bit..es who want to get off, get the hell off now, cause this is the last stop! And all you sons of bit..es who are returning and want to...	Yarra	0	985	04:52 PM Oct 24, 2016 by Yarra
	The Centipede (Preview) This bloke walks into a petshop and asks the attendant for a pet that requires absolutely no looking after. After a few moments the attendant tells him that they have a talking Centipede that does'nt need any attention. The bloke looks at him and says, "You're joking surely?" "Nope, its a fair dinkum t...	Magnarc	0	956	09:25 AM Oct 24, 2016 by Magnarc
	Cordless Drill (Preview) OK it did not wark -- Edited by PeterD on Sunday 23rd of October 2016 05:31:48 PM	PeterD	4	1122	08:17 AM Oct 24, 2016 by Aus-Kiwi
	A couple of funnies (Preview) **Pharmacist to customer: "Sir, please understand, to buy an anti-depression pill you need a proper prescription... Simply showing marriage certificate and wife's picture is not enough."** *A bookseller conducting a market survey asked a woman - "Which book has helped you most in your life? Th...	Moorey	0	1064	10:12 PM Oct 22, 2016 by Moorey
	Two wongs (Preview)	Woody n Sue	0	925	07:27 PM Oct 19, 2016 by Woody n Sue
	EXPERT OCCUPATION !! (Preview) I called an old school friend and asked what was he doing. He replied that he is working on "Aqua-thermal treatment of ceramics, aluminium and steel under a constrained environment". I was impressed...... On further enquiring I learnt that he was washing dishes with hot water .......Under his...	kiwijims	2	1416	03:46 PM Oct 18, 2016 by Tony Bev
	Things aren't always what they seem " reader discretion required " (Preview)	Woody n Sue	3	1479	12:49 PM Oct 18, 2016 by Baggie
	Should have got an A+ (Preview)	Woody n Sue	11	1639	12:45 PM Oct 18, 2016 by Baggie
	Old and Pregnant? (Preview) A 68 year old woman told her friend over a bingo game that she wanted to have a baby. Her friend, in reasonable disbelief, laughed at her.The 68 year old woman retorted, "Well, I have the apparatus to and with today's technology, I can have a baby."And she did just that. She got pregnant and had a baby boy....	Yarra	0	1254	10:09 AM Oct 11, 2016 by Yarra
	An Irish painter by the name of Murphy, (Preview) While not a brilliant scholar, was a gifted portrait artist.Over a short number of years, his fame grew and soon people from all over Ireland were coming to the town of Miltown Malbay, in County Clare, to get him to paint their likenesses.One day, a beautiful young English woman arrived at his house in...	Yarra	0	1104	10:05 AM Oct 11, 2016 by Yarra
	Gravity Defying Tequila (Preview) A guy sits at a bar in a skyscraper restaurant high above the city. He slams a shot of tequila, goes over to the window and jumps out. The guy sitting next to him can't believe what he just saw. He's more surprised when, 10 minutes later, the same guy walks back into the bar and sits down next to him. The ast...	Yarra	0	959	05:39 PM Oct 10, 2016 by Yarra
	Dead Irishman (Preview) Six retired Irishmen were playing poker in O'Leary's apartment when Paddy Murphy loses 500 on a single hand, clutches his chest and drops dead at the table. Showing respect for their fallen brother, the other five continue play standing until Michael O'Connor looks around and asks, "Ok, me lads, s...	Yarra	0	1036	05:37 PM Oct 10, 2016 by Yarra
	About right . Though some think they are perfect (Preview) Have we changed much ?	Aus-Kiwi	0	860	05:06 PM Oct 10, 2016 by Aus-Kiwi
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