Just Joking

kiwijims · kiwijims

Two female teachers took a group of students from grades 1, 2 and 3 for a field trip to Flemington Racecourse. When it was time to take the children to the 'bathroom', it was decided that the girls would go with one teacher and the boys would go with the other. The teacher assigned to the boys was waiting...

Woody n Sue · Woody n Sue

Yarra · Yarra

A mother was working in the kitchen listening to her son playing with his new electric train in the living room. She heard the train stop and her son said, "All of you sons of bit..es who want to get off, get the hell off now, cause this is the last stop! And all you sons of bit..es who are returning and want to...

Magnarc · Magnarc

This bloke walks into a petshop and asks the attendant for a pet that requires absolutely no looking after. After a few moments the attendant tells him that they have a talking Centipede that does'nt need any attention. The bloke looks at him and says, "You're joking surely?" "Nope, its a fair dinkum t...

PeterD · PeterD

OK it did not wark -- Edited by PeterD on Sunday 23rd of October 2016 05:31:48 PM

Moorey · Moorey

*Pharmacist to customer:* *"Sir, please understand, to buy an anti-depression pill you need a proper prescription... Simply showing marriage certificate and wife's picture is not enough."* *A bookseller conducting a market survey asked a woman - "Which book has helped you most in your life? Th...

Woody n Sue · Woody n Sue

kiwijims · kiwijims

I called an old school friend and asked what was he doing. He replied that he is working on "Aqua-thermal treatment of ceramics, aluminium and steel under a constrained environment". I was impressed...... On further enquiring I learnt that he was washing dishes with hot water .......Under his...

Woody n Sue · Woody n Sue

Woody n Sue · Woody n Sue

Yarra · Yarra

A 68 year old woman told her friend over a bingo game that she wanted to have a baby. Her friend, in reasonable disbelief, laughed at her.The 68 year old woman retorted, "Well, I have the apparatus to and with today's technology, I can have a baby."And she did just that. She got pregnant and had a baby boy....

Yarra · Yarra

While not a brilliant scholar, was a gifted portrait artist.Over a short number of years, his fame grew and soon people from all over Ireland were coming to the town of Miltown Malbay, in County Clare, to get him to paint their likenesses.One day, a beautiful young English woman arrived at his house in...

Yarra · Yarra

A guy sits at a bar in a skyscraper restaurant high above the city. He slams a shot of tequila, goes over to the window and jumps out. The guy sitting next to him can't believe what he just saw. He's more surprised when, 10 minutes later, the same guy walks back into the bar and sits down next to him. The ast...

Yarra · Yarra

Six retired Irishmen were playing poker in O'Leary's apartment when Paddy Murphy loses 500 on a single hand, clutches his chest and drops dead at the table. Showing respect for their fallen brother, the other five continue play standing until Michael O'Connor looks around and asks, "Ok, me lads, s...

Aus-Kiwi · Aus-Kiwi

Have we changed much ?

rgren2 · rgren2

How To Shower Like a Woman1. Take off clothes and place them sectioned in laundry basket according tolights and darks. 2. Walk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown. 3. If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas. 4. Look at your womanly physique in the mirror - make mental note to d...

Yarra · Yarra

At dawn the telephone rings.Hello, Senor Lucky? This is Ernesto the caretaker at your country house.Ah yes, Ernesto. What can I do for you? Is there a problem?Um, I am just calling to advise you, Senor, that your parrot diedMy parrot? Dead? The one that won the International competition?Si, Senor, t...

Yarra · Yarra

A man staggers into an emergency room with two black eyes. Naturally the doctor asks him what happened."Well, it was like this," says the man. "I was having a quiet round of golf with my wife, when at a difficult hole, she sliced her ball into a cow pasture. We went to look for it, and while I was searching a...

aussie_paul · aussie_paul

https://www.youtube.com/embed/prfCkIOdeAc?rel=0&controls=0&showinfo=0 Aussie Paul.

Woody n Sue · Woody n Sue

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	A Day At The Horse Races.... (Preview) Two female teachers took a group of students from grades 1, 2 and 3 for a field trip to Flemington Racecourse. When it was time to take the children to the 'bathroom', it was decided that the girls would go with one teacher and the boys would go with the other. The teacher assigned to the boys was waiting...	kiwijims	2	1077	11:24 PM Oct 26, 2016 by kiwijims
	There is a new roll on deodorant out (Preview)	Woody n Sue	0	1012	07:08 AM Oct 25, 2016 by Woody n Sue
	Train Departure (Preview) A mother was working in the kitchen listening to her son playing with his new electric train in the living room. She heard the train stop and her son said, "All of you sons of bit..es who want to get off, get the hell off now, cause this is the last stop! And all you sons of bit..es who are returning and want to...	Yarra	0	1011	04:52 PM Oct 24, 2016 by Yarra
	The Centipede (Preview) This bloke walks into a petshop and asks the attendant for a pet that requires absolutely no looking after. After a few moments the attendant tells him that they have a talking Centipede that does'nt need any attention. The bloke looks at him and says, "You're joking surely?" "Nope, its a fair dinkum t...	Magnarc	0	988	09:25 AM Oct 24, 2016 by Magnarc
	Cordless Drill (Preview) OK it did not wark -- Edited by PeterD on Sunday 23rd of October 2016 05:31:48 PM	PeterD	4	1153	08:17 AM Oct 24, 2016 by Aus-Kiwi
	A couple of funnies (Preview) **Pharmacist to customer: "Sir, please understand, to buy an anti-depression pill you need a proper prescription... Simply showing marriage certificate and wife's picture is not enough."** *A bookseller conducting a market survey asked a woman - "Which book has helped you most in your life? Th...	Moorey	0	1090	10:12 PM Oct 22, 2016 by Moorey
	Two wongs (Preview)	Woody n Sue	0	950	07:27 PM Oct 19, 2016 by Woody n Sue
	EXPERT OCCUPATION !! (Preview) I called an old school friend and asked what was he doing. He replied that he is working on "Aqua-thermal treatment of ceramics, aluminium and steel under a constrained environment". I was impressed...... On further enquiring I learnt that he was washing dishes with hot water .......Under his...	kiwijims	2	1444	03:46 PM Oct 18, 2016 by Tony Bev
	Things aren't always what they seem " reader discretion required " (Preview)	Woody n Sue	3	1531	12:49 PM Oct 18, 2016 by Baggie
	Should have got an A+ (Preview)	Woody n Sue	11	1669	12:45 PM Oct 18, 2016 by Baggie
	Old and Pregnant? (Preview) A 68 year old woman told her friend over a bingo game that she wanted to have a baby. Her friend, in reasonable disbelief, laughed at her.The 68 year old woman retorted, "Well, I have the apparatus to and with today's technology, I can have a baby."And she did just that. She got pregnant and had a baby boy....	Yarra	0	1279	10:09 AM Oct 11, 2016 by Yarra
	An Irish painter by the name of Murphy, (Preview) While not a brilliant scholar, was a gifted portrait artist.Over a short number of years, his fame grew and soon people from all over Ireland were coming to the town of Miltown Malbay, in County Clare, to get him to paint their likenesses.One day, a beautiful young English woman arrived at his house in...	Yarra	0	1128	10:05 AM Oct 11, 2016 by Yarra
	Gravity Defying Tequila (Preview) A guy sits at a bar in a skyscraper restaurant high above the city. He slams a shot of tequila, goes over to the window and jumps out. The guy sitting next to him can't believe what he just saw. He's more surprised when, 10 minutes later, the same guy walks back into the bar and sits down next to him. The ast...	Yarra	0	989	05:39 PM Oct 10, 2016 by Yarra
	Dead Irishman (Preview) Six retired Irishmen were playing poker in O'Leary's apartment when Paddy Murphy loses 500 on a single hand, clutches his chest and drops dead at the table. Showing respect for their fallen brother, the other five continue play standing until Michael O'Connor looks around and asks, "Ok, me lads, s...	Yarra	0	1059	05:37 PM Oct 10, 2016 by Yarra
	About right . Though some think they are perfect (Preview) Have we changed much ?	Aus-Kiwi	0	886	05:06 PM Oct 10, 2016 by Aus-Kiwi
	Showering (Preview) How To Shower Like a Woman1. Take off clothes and place them sectioned in laundry basket according tolights and darks. 2. Walk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown. 3. If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas. 4. Look at your womanly physique in the mirror - make mental note to d...	rgren2	1	1068	08:41 PM Oct 8, 2016 by iana
	A Telephone Call (Preview) At dawn the telephone rings.Hello, Senor Lucky? This is Ernesto the caretaker at your country house.Ah yes, Ernesto. What can I do for you? Is there a problem?Um, I am just calling to advise you, Senor, that your parrot diedMy parrot? Dead? The one that won the International competition?Si, Senor, t...	Yarra	0	1114	05:43 PM Oct 8, 2016 by Yarra
	Situation Joke (Preview) A man staggers into an emergency room with two black eyes. Naturally the doctor asks him what happened."Well, it was like this," says the man. "I was having a quiet round of golf with my wife, when at a difficult hole, she sliced her ball into a cow pasture. We went to look for it, and while I was searching a...	Yarra	0	948	05:38 PM Oct 8, 2016 by Yarra
	Mem'ries.... (Where Did I Put My Keys): A Cartoon from ... (Preview) https://www.youtube.com/embed/prfCkIOdeAc?rel=0&controls=0&showinfo=0 Aussie Paul.	aussie_paul	5	1345	05:35 PM Oct 8, 2016 by Felicia
	Wisdom with age (Preview)	Woody n Sue	0	1144	01:16 PM Oct 4, 2016 by Woody n Sue
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