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A few Dad jokes
(Preview)
I played golf today got a hole in one ! There expecting ting showers in broom
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Woody n Sue
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587
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A challenge to Goldfingers best Irish joke
(Preview)
Apologies if this has been posted before. Pat and Mick are walking down the village street when they meet the Father coming towards them. "Hello Father" says Mick, "Hello Father says Pat. "Hello there boys what are ye up to today?" says the Priest. "Nuttin Father&...
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Magnarc
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1
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610
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Why I don't drink at the club
(Preview)
http://www.engrish.com/wp-content/uploads//2016/01/pee-soon.jpg
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dorian
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818
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This remains the best genuine Irish Joke I have ever heard...oldy but goody....
(Preview)
Paddy had been drinking at his local pub all day and most of the night, 'celebrating' St.Patrick's Day... Mick, the bartender says, "You'll not be drinking anymore tonight, Paddy" Paddy replies, "OK Mick, O'ill be on me way then". Paddy spins around on his stool and steps off....
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goldfinger
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0
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719
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IRISH BLONDE
(Preview)
IRISH BLONDE On a bitterly cold winter morning a husband and wife in Dublin were listening to the radio during breakfast. They heard the announcer say, "We are going to have 8 to 10 inches of snow today. You must park your car on the even-numbered side of the street, so the Snow p...
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aussie_paul
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677
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Be a happy Nomad..not a grumpy old Gromad......share a smile...
(Preview)
Bob, a 71 year-old extremely wealthy widower, shows up at the RV Motorhome Convention with a breathtakingly beautiful and verrry sexy 25 year old blond-haired Lass, who knocks everyone's socks off,......well most anyway, perhaps not a lot of the Matrons,... with her youthful stunning sex appea...
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goldfinger
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0
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904
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The Speech Therapist..
(Preview)
A very pretty young speech therapist was getting absolutely nowhere with her 3 male 'Stammers Action Group'.. She had tried every technique in the text book, but still they stammered and stuttered. Finally, totally exasperated, she said: "If any of you can tell me where you were born, withou...
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goldfinger
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1
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758
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VERY DISTURBING
(Preview)
Subject: VERY DISTURBING REVELATION Sexual activity for senior males: (where were you born?) Statistics just released from The United Nations B.O.H. Team, reveal that: Australian men between 60 and 75 years of age, will, on average, have sex two to three times per week, (and a small number have it a...
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Douglas Leigh
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2
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760
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CAB FAIR XXX
(Preview)
One rainy spring night in Dublin, a taxi driver spotted an arm waving from the shadows of an alley. Even before he rolled to a stop at the curb, a figure leaped into the cab and slammed the door. Checking his rear view mirror as he pulled away, he was startled to see a dripping wet, naked woman sitting in th...
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Douglas Leigh
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714
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Sports
(Preview)
In Cricket you get a Duck. In Golf you have a birdie and an Eagle. In football you have a foul(fowl). So I pose the question, what do you get in Bowls??? Scroll down. Goldfish. Daft ain't it?
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Magnarc
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1
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889
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You're the father of one of my kids...
(Preview)
A guy goes to the supermarket and notices a very attractive woman waving at him.She says, 'Hello.'He's rather taken aback because he can't place where he knows her from. So he asks, 'Do you know me?'To which she replies, 'I think you're the father of one of my kids.'His mind begins to race. He remembers...
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Yarra
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698
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Laid Off
(Preview)
Paddy and Mick were both laid off, so they went to the unemployment office. When asked his occupation Paddy answered, "Knicker Stitcher. I sew da elastic onto ladies knickers and thongs."The clerk looked up "Knicker Stitcher" on his computer and, finding it classified as un...
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Yarra
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0
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636
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A MESSAGE FROM THE QUEEN
(Preview)
r A MESSAGE FROM THE THE QUEEN To the citizens of the United States of America from Her Sovereign Majesty Queen Elizabeth II In light of your failure in recent years to nominate competent candidates for President of the USA and thus to govern yourselves, we hereby give notice of the revocati...
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Douglas Leigh
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3
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1324
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The practice lives on.
(Preview)
Once upon a time there was a king who wanted to go fishing. He called the royal weather forecaster and inquired as to the weather forecast for the next few hours. The weatherman assured him that there was no chance of rain in the coming days. So the king went fishing with his wife, the queen. On the way he...
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Moorey
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1
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705
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One of my old Pa's favourites to tell us.....much to my Nan's chagrin.
(Preview)
Ma was in the kitchen fiddling around when she hollers out, "Pa! You need to go out and fix the outhouse..NOW!" Pa replies, "There ain't nuthin' wrong with the outhouse." Ma yells back, "yes there is, now git out there NOW and fix it." So Pa mosies out to the outhouse, l...
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goldfinger
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5
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1021
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Murder.
(Preview)
Stop press......... A nude male dead body was found today in a Yorkshire park with a Weetbix stuck in his mouth. Police are looking for a cereal killer........... Daft aint it?
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Magnarc
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3
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1038
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The Priest and the Rabbi....
(Preview)
A Priest and a Rabbi were sitting in adjacent seats on a airplane. After a while the Priest turned to the Rabbi and asked, "Is it still a requirement of your faith that you not eat pork?" The Rabbi responded "Yes, that is still one of our Laws." The Priest then asked, "Sooooo...
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goldfinger
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0
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697
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A few Zingers......
(Preview)
<Singing>.....When you're down by the sea, and an eel bites your knee....Thattt's a Moray. Pharmacist to customer: "Sir, please understand, to buy anti depressant tablets, you really need a proper prescription.... Simply showing me your Marriage Certificate and a photo of your wi...
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goldfinger
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0
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750
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THE EXAM
(Preview)
After my prostrate exam, the doctor left. < div> Then the nurse came in. As she shut the door, she whispered the three words that no man wants to hear: 'Who Was That?' < div> -- Edited by Douglas Leigh on Thursday 4th of February 2016 01:35:53 PM
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Douglas Leigh
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1
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766
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Poor Old Bill.....
(Preview)
Hillary Clinton goes to her doctor for a check-up, only to find out that she's pregnant. She is absolutely furious....here she is in the middle of her election campaign...now this has happened to her! She calls home, gets Bill on the phone and immediately starts screaming: "You bas***d! How c...
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goldfinger
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3
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1021
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