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Microchip Implant
(Preview)
MICROCHIP IMPLANT ALLOWS TERRORISTS TO SPEAK TO GOD COPPER COATED MICROCHIP IMPLANT ALLOWS TERRORISTS TO SPEAK TO GOD. The implant is specifically designed to be injected in the forehead. When properly installed, it will instantly allow the terrorist to speak to God. It comes in var...
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Hendo
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2
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868
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A guy goes to the Post Office...
(Preview)
A to apply for a job.The interviewer asks him, "Are you allergic to anything?"He replies, "Yes, caffeine. I can't drink coffee.""OK, have you ever been in the military service?""Yes," he says, "I was in Iraq for one tour."The interviewer s...
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aussie_paul
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0
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912
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lol....
(Preview)
Special Travel Package for BusinessmenAn Airline introduced a special package for Business men. Buy your ticket, get your wife's ticket free! After great success, the company sent letters to all the wives asking how the trip was. 72% of them gave the same reply..."What trip?" Co...
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aussie_paul
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0
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976
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OOooooPS
(Preview)
A chicken farmer went to the local bar. He sat next to a woman and ordered champagne. The woman said: "How strange, I also just ordered a glass of champagne." "What a coincidence," said the farmer, who added, " It is a special day for me. I am celebrating." "I...
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Young Simmo
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0
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813
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When you're over 70 who cares?
(Preview)
I was standing at the bar one night, minding my own business. This big O FAT, ugly chick came up behind me, grabbed my ass and said, "You're kind of cute; you gotta phone number?" I said, "Yea. You gotta pen?" She said, "Yea, I got a pen." Isaid, "Youd better ge...
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Possum3
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0
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1140
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Morning After Xmas Party At The Zoo
(Preview)
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Yarra
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0
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1037
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Terrorism, High Alert Causing Me Problems
(Preview)
Terrorism, High Alert Causing Me Problems After hearing the news about possible terrorism attack and a high security alert I was a little nervous, so when I was at the checkout and ready to pay for my groceries the cashier said, "Strip down, facing me." Making a mental note so I could comp...
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aussie_paul
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1
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990
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How to outsmart teenagers
(Preview)
A wise old gentleman retired and purchased a modest home near a junior high school. He spent the first few weeks of his retirement in peace and contentment. Then a new school year began.The very next afternoon three young boys, full of youthful, after-school enthusiasm, came down his street, beat...
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Brenda and Alan
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0
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832
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Zoo
(Preview)
A man went to a new zoo. There was only one animal there - a dog. It was a sh1tzu. -- Edited by erad on Tuesday 1st of December 2015 08:51:58 PM
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erad
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3
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1000
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Happy solar panels
(Preview)
What did the solar panels say when the sun came out from the clouds.....Array.
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Tomcat
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0
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694
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Old couple getting mixed up
(Preview)
So there was this old couple who agreed to write things down to remember because the they were losing their memories and starting to argue a bit. The husband said to the wife would you like a snack my dear to which she replied yes please i would like some strawberries. He said coming right up but before he g...
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Tomcat
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0
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822
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Be Careful
(Preview)
Frank and Fiona were making passionate > love in Frank's van when suddenly > Fiona, who was a bit on the kinky > side, and had just read "50 shades of > grey", yells out, > > "Oh fat boy, whip me, whip me!" > > Frank, not wanting to pass up this > unique op...
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Young Simmo
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0
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711
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Love it!!!
(Preview)
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Gunsondeck
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0
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749
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the middle wife
(Preview)
The Middle Wife
The 'Middle Wife' by an Anonymous 2nd grade teacher
I've been teaching now for about fifteen years. I have two kids myself, but the best birth story I know is the one I saw in my own second grade classroom a few years back.
When I was a kid, I loved show-and-tell. So I always have a few s...
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banditandjo
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0
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961
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Not sure
(Preview)
I was emptying my car boot and a bloke walking past asked me what the bottle of water was for. So I explained to him that one day when we were out at Alice Springs we went for a drive out to a sacred site. We got talking to one of the locals who said that the well there was the dead center of Australia, and if you ti...
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Young Simmo
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0
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813
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WHO NEEDS A DICTIONARY WHEN YOU HAVE DADS
(Preview)
A small boy has a school home work question to answer, so he asks his father , "Dad, what's the difference between 'theoretically' and 'realistically'?" His dad thinks and then says, "Right-o son, go and ask your Mother if she'd sleep with David Beckham for a million quid." The...
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kiwijims
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0
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901
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Irish Joke
(Preview)
Q: WHat's black and blue all over, and found floating in Dublin Harbour? A: A person who tells Irish jokes
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erad
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0
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821
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How to keep a Kiwi happy?
(Preview)
With the utmost respect for the Irish and the Kiwis, I still enjoy a joke about them,even the old ones which you may have heard being told. (I wonder when jokes about the Irish and Kiwis started?) Two jokes below unfairly slamdunk the Kiwis!Barry the Aussie builder was going through a house he had just b...
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sheeds
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1
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1163
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Health information
(Preview)
Love this Japanese Doctor! Dr. Yu Tok Kak Q: Doctor, I've heard that cardiovascular exercise can prolong life. Is this true?A: Heart only good for so many beats, and that it... Don't waste on exercise. Everything wear out eventually. Speeding up heart not make you live longer; it like saying you ext...
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Cadpete
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1
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1132
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Ya Gotta love the Irish
(Preview)
A married Irishman went into the confessional and said to his priest, 'I almost had an affair with another woman.' The priest said, 'What do you mean, almost?' The Irishman said, 'Well, we got undressed and rubbed together, but then I stopped.' The priest said, 'Rubbing together is the same as...
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Young Simmo
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1
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854
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