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Sounds like an ex wife
(Preview)
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Woody n Sue
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0
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816
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Hospital
(Preview)
Two little kids are in a hospital, lying on gurneys next to each other outside the operating room. They're the first surgeries of the day. Jimmy leans over and whispers, What are you in here for?Alec says, Im getting my tonsils out, and Im afraid.Jimmy says, Youve got nothing to worry about. I had that d...
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Yarra
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1
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954
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Your smile for the day.
(Preview)
The older doctor suggested that the young one accompany him on his rounds, so the community could become familiar with the new doctor. At the first house a woman complains, "I've been a little sick in my stomach." The older doctor says, "Well, you've probably been overdoing the fresh fruit. Why...
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Yarra
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0
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830
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STUD ROOSTER (oldie but a good one)
(Preview)
A farmer went out one day and bought a brand new stud rooster for his chicken coop.The new rooster struts over to the old rooster and says, 'OK old fart, time for you to retire.' The old rooster replies, 'Come on, surely you cannot handle ALL of these chickens. Look what it has done to me. Can't you just l...
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Yarra
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0
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828
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The husband had just finished reading a new book
(Preview)
Entitled You Can Be The Man Of Your House.He stormed to his wife in the kitchen and announced, From now on, you need to know that I am the man of this house and my word is law. You will prepare me a gourmet meal tonight, and when Im finished eating my meal, you will serve me a sumptuous dessert. After dinner, y...
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Yarra
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0
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991
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A mother-in-law doesn't trust her sons-in-law...
(Preview)
she decides to test them.First, she goes to the oldest's house. She jumps into a well, but her son-in-law rescues her promptly. The next morning, the oldest son-in-law finds a brand new Suzuki in front of his house with a little note: "Lots of love, your mother-in-law".The next day, she goes to her sec...
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Yarra
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0
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922
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A mother-in-law doesn't trust her sons-in-law...
(Preview)
...so she decides to test them.First, she goes to the oldest's house. She jumps into a well, but her son-in-law rescues her promptly. The next morning, the oldest son-in-law finds a brand new Suzuki in front of his house with a little note: "Lots of love, your mother-in-law".The next day, she goes to h...
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Yarra
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0
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593
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The Robot Bartender
(Preview)
A guy goes into a bar in Louisiana where there is a robot bartender. The robot says, What will you have?The guy replies, Whiskey.The robot brings back his drink and asks, Whats your IQ?The guy say, 168.The robot continues to talk about physics, space exploration, and medical technology.After the g...
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Yarra
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0
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724
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The Bunbury Likely Lads
(Preview)
So the story goes, and supposed to be true, but unconfirmedBack in the day of the Great Depression, Kalgoorlie was a town where you could get casual employment, if you had underground mining experienceTwo likely lads, from the Bunbury area, fancying their chances, went to the GoldfieldsAlas with n...
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Tony Bev
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0
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884
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Santa will be late...
(Preview)
Aussie Paul. -- Edited by aussie_paul on Friday 12th of August 2016 07:56:40 PM -- Edited by aussie_paul on Friday 12th of August 2016 07:58:08 PM
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aussie_paul
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1
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828
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The derivation of that word starting with 'P'..we can't discuss...
(Preview)
What happens if a Politician drowns in a river?...that is called 'Pollution'.. What happens if ALL of them happen to drown in a river?.....now that's called a 'Solution'..'Hoo Roo
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goldfinger
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0
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719
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Star Wars
(Preview)
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Woody n Sue
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3
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1020
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On ya grandma
(Preview)
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Woody n Sue
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0
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755
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High moral standards
(Preview)
I was offered sex with a 21 year old girl today.In exchange, I was supposed to advertise some kind of bathroom cleaner.Of course I declined, because I am a person with high moral standards and strong willpower.Just as strong as Ajax, the super strong bathroom cleaner.Now available with scented lemo...
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Yarra
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1
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802
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God's Aging Plan
(Preview)
Most seniors never get enough exercise.In His Wisdom God decreed that seniors become forgetful so they would have to search for their glasses, keys and other things thus doing more walking.And God looked down and saw that it was good.Then God saw there was another need. In His Wisdom He made seniors l...
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Yarra
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0
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829
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Another
(Preview)
can a man living in NSW be buried in Victoria ?
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Woody n Sue
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2
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945
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Legal question
(Preview)
is it legal for a man to marry his widow's sister ? woody
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Woody n Sue
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8
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1279
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The Ladies Toilet
(Preview)
Every cubicle is occupied.. Finally, a door opens and you dash in, nearly knocking down the woman leaving the cubicle. You get in to find the door won't latch. It doesn't matter, the wait has been so long you are about to wet your pants! The dispenser for the modern 'seat covers' (invented by som...
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LLD
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3
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1044
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What is Celibacy?
(Preview)
Celibacy can be a choice in life, Or a condition imposed by circumstances. While attending a Marriage Weekend, my wife and I, listened to the instructor declare, 'It is essential that husbands and wives know the things that are important to each other.." He then addressed the men,'Can you name an...
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kiwijims
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0
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954
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|
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Biker and the Drunk
(Preview)
A drunken man walks into a biker bar, sits down at the bar, and orders a drink. Looking around, he sees 3 men sitting at a corner table. He gets up, staggers to the table, leans over, looks at the biggest, meanest one in the face and says, I went by your grandmas house today and I saw her in the hallway buck na...
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Possum3
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0
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808
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