Just Joking

rockylizard · rockylizard

A Jewish grandmother is giving directions to her grown grandson who is coming to visit with his wife. "You come to the front door of the apartments. I am in apartment 301. There is a big panel at the front door. With your elbow, push button 301. I will buzz you in. Come inside and the elevator is on t...

SLUG · SLUG

Shortly after a British Airways flight had reached its cruising altitude, the captain announced: "Ladies and Gentlemen, this is your captain. Welcome to Flight 293, non-stop from London Heathrow to New York . The weather ahead is good, so we should have a smooth uneventful flight. So, sit bac...

SLUG · SLUG

Subject: CATHOLIC HAIR DRYER READ ON------------------------- You Don't HAVE TO BE CATHOLIC TO THINK THIS IS FUNNY! THIS IS PRICELESS! This is VERY clever! OH, THE POWER IN WORDS... In parochial school students are taught that lying is a sin. However, instructors also advised that usi...

SLUG · SLUG

Should I Really Join Facebook? (Priceless)A good laugh for people in the over 60 Group! When I bought my Blackberry, I thought about the 30-year business I ran with 1800 employees, all without a cell phone that plays music, takes videos, pictures and communicates with Facebook and Twitter. I signed...

aussie_paul · aussie_paul

I was listening to the radio this morning when the HostInvited callers to reveal the nick-names they had for their wives.The best call was from a brave chap who called his wife, "Harvey Norman"The Host asked him why that name?He replied: "Absolutely no interest for 36 months!!!!!...

Gunsondeck · Gunsondeck

Dear Dad London is wonderful, the people are really nice and I do like it here, but Dad, I am a little ashamed arriving at my college in my pure-gold Ferrari 599GTB, when all my teachers, and many fellow students, travel by train. Your son, Nasser Next day, Nasser gets a reply to his e-mail My dear loving...

Vic41 · Vic41

1. A girl is said to be grown up when she starts wearing a bra. A boy is grown up when he starts removing it. 2. Women love to spend lots of money buying new clothes but never realise that the best moments in life are enjoyed without clothes. 3. Having a cold drink on hot day with a few friends is nice, but havin...

Yendorane · Yendorane

An elderly couple, who were both widowed, had been going out with each other for a long time. Urged on by their friends, they decided it was finally time to get married. Before the wedding, they went out to dinner and had a long conversation regarding how their marriage might work. They discussed finan...

Happy Camper · Happy Camper

Edward Longshanks (Edward I of England) comes to Scotland to conquer the Scots. He brings 4,000 men with him. As he nears the battlefield, there suddenly appears a solitary figure on the crest of the hill, a short, ginger-haired guy in a kilt. 'Hammer O the Scots?' yells the wee Scottish guy on the hill...

Vic41 · Vic41

A Sparky ('Electrician' Royalty of all Trades) dies in a car accident on his 40th birthday and finds himself at the Pearly Gates. A brass band is playing, the angels are singing a beautiful hymn, there is a huge crowd cheering and shouting his name, and absolutely everyone wants to shake his hand. Jus...

Cowboy7307 · Cowboy7307

Three old women sitting on a park bench, when a flasher walked up to them and did his thing, Two of the women had a stroke, The third couldn't reach Well i thought it was funny

Yendorane · Yendorane

A major International company was looking to hire someone for an important position, so they interviewed dozens of applicants and narrowed their search down to three people from different parts of the world. In an attempt to pick one of them, they decided to give them all the same question to answer w...

rockylizard · rockylizard

A nun, a priest, an Irishman, an Australian, a rabbi and a blonde walk into a bar. The bartender looks at them and asks, "Is this some kind of joke?".

Redlander · Redlander

Gotta love us seniors During a visit to my doctor, I asked him, "How do you determine whether or not an older person should be put in an old age home?" "Well," he said, "we fill up a bathtub, then we offer a teaspoon, a teacup and a bucket to the person to empty the bathtub."...

Joe50 · Joe50

I love this new word ... I even like pronouncing it!

Collo · Collo

A man wakes up in hospital bandaged from head to toe. The doctor comes in "Ah I see you have woken up. Now you wont remember but you were in a horrible car accident. You are going to be O.K but your penis was severed and we couldn't find it." The man groans but the doctor goes on."You have $90...

Woody n Sue · Woody n Sue

Gunsondeck · Gunsondeck

This letter was sent to the Broken Hill High School Principal's office in Broken Hill, outback Australia after the school had sponsored a luncheon for seniors. An elderly lady received a new radio at the lunch as a door raffle prize and was writing to say thank you. This story is a credit t...

Yendorane · Yendorane

A woman received a call that her daughter was sick. She stopped by the pharmacy to get medication, got back to her car and found that she had locked her keys inside. She woman found an old rusty coat hanger left on the ground. She looked at it and said "I don't know how to use this." She bowed her h...

Vic41 · Vic41

DIVORCE VS. MURDER A nice, calm and respectable lady went into the pharmacy, walked up to the pharmacist, looked straight into his eyes, and said, I would like to buy some cyanide. ' The pharmacist asked, 'Why in the world do you need cyanide?' The lady replied, 'I need it to poison my husband.' The pha...

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	Jewish Grandmother (Preview) A Jewish grandmother is giving directions to her grown grandson who is coming to visit with his wife. "You come to the front door of the apartments. I am in apartment 301. There is a big panel at the front door. With your elbow, push button 301. I will buzz you in. Come inside and the elevator is on t...	rockylizard	2	726	05:50 PM Aug 17, 2014 by Glenhuon
	THE IRISH AGAIN (Preview) Shortly after a British Airways flight had reached its cruising altitude, the captain announced: "Ladies and Gentlemen, this is your captain. Welcome to Flight 293, non-stop from London Heathrow to New York . The weather ahead is good, so we should have a smooth uneventful flight. So, sit bac...	SLUG	0	771	02:32 PM Aug 16, 2014 by SLUG
	AGOOD LAUGH (Preview) Subject: CATHOLIC HAIR DRYER READ ON------------------------- You Don't HAVE TO BE CATHOLIC TO THINK THIS IS FUNNY! THIS IS PRICELESS! This is VERY clever! OH, THE POWER IN WORDS... In parochial school students are taught that lying is a sin. However, instructors also advised that usi...	SLUG	0	723	02:25 PM Aug 16, 2014 by SLUG
	over 60 using face book (Preview) Should I Really Join Facebook? (Priceless)A good laugh for people in the over 60 Group! When I bought my Blackberry, I thought about the 30-year business I ran with 1800 employees, all without a cell phone that plays music, takes videos, pictures and communicates with Facebook and Twitter. I signed...	SLUG	0	768	02:02 PM Aug 16, 2014 by SLUG
	Wife's Nickname (Preview) I was listening to the radio this morning when the HostInvited callers to reveal the nick-names they had for their wives.The best call was from a brave chap who called his wife, "Harvey Norman"The Host asked him why that name?He replied: "Absolutely no interest for 36 months!!!!!...	aussie_paul	0	730	11:54 AM Aug 16, 2014 by aussie_paul
	Dear Dad. (Preview) Dear Dad London is wonderful, the people are really nice and I do like it here, but Dad, I am a little ashamed arriving at my college in my pure-gold Ferrari 599GTB, when all my teachers, and many fellow students, travel by train. Your son, Nasser Next day, Nasser gets a reply to his e-mail My dear loving...	Gunsondeck	0	777	10:57 AM Aug 16, 2014 by Gunsondeck
	Unshakeable Facts..... (Preview) 1. A girl is said to be grown up when she starts wearing a bra. A boy is grown up when he starts removing it. 2. Women love to spend lots of money buying new clothes but never realise that the best moments in life are enjoyed without clothes. 3. Having a cold drink on hot day with a few friends is nice, but havin...	Vic41	1	765	04:27 PM Aug 15, 2014 by JRH
	Seniors Wedding.... (Preview) An elderly couple, who were both widowed, had been going out with each other for a long time. Urged on by their friends, they decided it was finally time to get married. Before the wedding, they went out to dinner and had a long conversation regarding how their marriage might work. They discussed finan...	Yendorane	1	848	11:00 AM Aug 15, 2014 by roadtourer
	CONQUER THE SCOTS... (Preview) Edward Longshanks (Edward I of England) comes to Scotland to conquer the Scots. He brings 4,000 men with him. As he nears the battlefield, there suddenly appears a solitary figure on the crest of the hill, a short, ginger-haired guy in a kilt. 'Hammer O the Scots?' yells the wee Scottish guy on the hill...	Happy Camper	1	801	11:40 PM Aug 14, 2014 by Glenhuon
	Sparky (Electrician) Goes To Heaven.... (Preview) A Sparky ('Electrician' Royalty of all Trades) dies in a car accident on his 40th birthday and finds himself at the Pearly Gates. A brass band is playing, the angels are singing a beautiful hymn, there is a huge crowd cheering and shouting his name, and absolutely everyone wants to shake his hand. Jus...	Vic41	2	1005	10:20 PM Aug 14, 2014 by Glenhuon
	The Flasher (Preview) Three old women sitting on a park bench, when a flasher walked up to them and did his thing, Two of the women had a stroke, The third couldn't reach Well i thought it was funny	Cowboy7307	1	785	09:16 PM Aug 14, 2014 by sarg
	A major International company (Preview) A major International company was looking to hire someone for an important position, so they interviewed dozens of applicants and narrowed their search down to three people from different parts of the world. In an attempt to pick one of them, they decided to give them all the same question to answer w...	Yendorane	2	778	09:14 PM Aug 14, 2014 by sarg
	Bar Joke (Preview) A nun, a priest, an Irishman, an Australian, a rabbi and a blonde walk into a bar. The bartender looks at them and asks, "Is this some kind of joke?".	rockylizard	1	757	09:12 PM Aug 14, 2014 by sarg
	Are U Ready for the Old Age Home (Preview) Gotta love us seniors During a visit to my doctor, I asked him, "How do you determine whether or not an older person should be put in an old age home?" "Well," he said, "we fill up a bathtub, then we offer a teaspoon, a teacup and a bucket to the person to empty the bathtub."...	Redlander	5	1155	08:11 PM Aug 12, 2014 by roadtourer
	New word for seniors (Preview) I love this new word ... I even like pronouncing it!	Joe50	1	757	07:54 PM Aug 12, 2014 by pugs
	Oh No!! (Preview) A man wakes up in hospital bandaged from head to toe. The doctor comes in "Ah I see you have woken up. Now you wont remember but you were in a horrible car accident. You are going to be O.K but your penis was severed and we couldn't find it." The man groans but the doctor goes on."You have $90...	Collo	3	861	12:33 PM Aug 12, 2014 by Kisha
	Would this be a job for a grey nomad (Preview)	Woody n Sue	1	809	10:14 PM Aug 11, 2014 by Vic41
	A touching moment... (Preview) This letter was sent to the Broken Hill High School Principal's office in Broken Hill, outback Australia after the school had sponsored a luncheon for seniors. An elderly lady received a new radio at the lunch as a door raffle prize and was writing to say thank you. This story is a credit t...	Gunsondeck	0	1021	06:34 PM Aug 8, 2014 by Gunsondeck
	GOD HAS A SENSE OF HUMOR (Preview) A woman received a call that her daughter was sick. She stopped by the pharmacy to get medication, got back to her car and found that she had locked her keys inside. She woman found an old rusty coat hanger left on the ground. She looked at it and said "I don't know how to use this." She bowed her h...	Yendorane	0	792	08:28 AM Aug 8, 2014 by Yendorane
	Divorce vs Murder (oldie but a goodie) (Preview) DIVORCE VS. MURDER A nice, calm and respectable lady went into the pharmacy, walked up to the pharmacist, looked straight into his eyes, and said, I would like to buy some cyanide. ' The pharmacist asked, 'Why in the world do you need cyanide?' The lady replied, 'I need it to poison my husband.' The pha...	Vic41	0	708	04:33 PM Aug 7, 2014 by Vic41
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