Just Joking

Hurls · Hurls

If you start with a cage containing five monkeys and inside the cage, hang a banana on a string from the top and then you place a set of stairs under the banana, before long a monkey will go to the stairs and climb toward the banana. As soon as he touches the stairs, you spray all the other monkeys with cold wa...

dazren · dazren

this one needs no comment.....Meanwhile In Australia. One day a father gets out of work and on his way home he suddenly remembers that it's his daughter's birthday. He pulls over to a Toy Shop and asks the sales person, 'How much for one of those Barbie's in the display window?' The salesperson answers...

justcruisin01 · justcruisin01

Warning about Bid-or-Buy Be careful what you buy on Bid-or-Buy. If you buy stuff online, check out the seller carefully. A friend, has just spent $85 plus GST on a penis enlarger. Bastards sent him a magnifying glass. The only instructions said, "Do not use in direct sunlight."

justcruisin01 · justcruisin01

AUSTRIAN MAGICAn Austrian and a Bavarian entered a chocolate store. As they were busy looking, the Bavarian stole 3 chocolate bars. As they left the store, the Bavarian said to the Austrian, "Man I'm the best thief, I stole 3 chocolate bars and no one saw me. You can't beat that." The Austr...

gerard gue · gerard gue

There was a father who left 17 camels as an asset for his three sons. When the father passed away, his sons opened up the Will. The Will of the father stated that the eldest son should get 1/2 (half) of total camels while the middle son should be given 1/3rd (one-third) and the youngest son should be given 1...

justcruisin01 · justcruisin01

Baby's First Doctor Visit This made me laugh out loud. I hope it will give you a smile! A woman and a baby were in the doctor's examining room, waiting for the doctor to come in for the baby's first exam. The doctor arrived, and examined the baby, checked his weight, and being a little concerned, asked i...

justcruisin01 · justcruisin01

While acquainting myself with a new elderly patient, I asked, 'How long have you been bedridden?' After a look of complete confusion she answered . . .. ' Why, not for about twenty years - when my husband was alive.'

justcruisin01 · justcruisin01

DIVORCE VS. MURDER* A nice, calm and respectable lady went into the pharmacy, walked up to the pharmacist, looked straight into his eyes, and said, I would like to buy some cyanide. ' The pharmacist asked, 'Why in the world do you need cyanide?' The lady replied, 'I need it to poison my husband.' The ph...

justcruisin01 · justcruisin01

''Are you circumcised?''] A man walks into the Election office and says to the receptionist: "I would like to put my name forward for the forthcoming elections to be an Independent candidate. The receptionist replies "Certainly sir. Please fill in this form.'' He was filling the fo...

Hoodathunkit · Hoodathunkit

SEX AT 68 I just took a leaflet out of my mailbox, informing me that I can have sex at 68. I'm so happy, because I live at number 72. So it's not too far to walk home afterwards. And it's the same side of the street. I don't even have to cross the road!~~~~~ Answering machine message, "I am not available...

JayDee · JayDee

LOGIC 101 . Woman: Do you drink beer? Man: Yes Woman: How many beers a day? Man: Usually about 3 Woman: How much do you pay per beer? Man: $5.00 which includes a tip (This is where it gets scary !) Woman: And how long have you been drinking? Man: About 20 years, I suppose Woman: So a beer costs $5 and you...

justcruisin01 · justcruisin01

Hitman Two old friends were just about to tee off at the first hole of their local golf course when a guy carrying a golf bag called out to them, "Do you mind if I join you? My partner didn't turn up". Sure, they said, youre welcome. So they started playing and enjoyed the game and the compan...

copper1 · copper1

A Mom visits her son for dinner who lives with a girl roommate. During the course of the meal, his mother couldn't help but notice how pretty his roommate was.She had long been suspicious of a relationship between the two, and this had only made her more curious.... Over the course of the evening, while...

spida · spida

Two medical students were walking along the street when they saw an old man walking with his legs spread apart. He was stiff-legged and walking slowly. One student said to his friend: "I'm sure that poor old man has Peltry Syndrome. Those people walk just like that." The other student say...

sarg · sarg

A woman was in town on a shopping trip. She began her day finding the most perfect shoes in the first shop and a beautiful dress on sale in the second. In the third, everything had just been reduced by 50 percent when her mobile phone rang. It was a female doctor notifying her that her husband had jus...

sarg · sarg

She greeted him at the door dressed only in her "special occasion" bra and panties: "Have you ever seen a twenty dollar bill all crumpled up?" asked the wife. "No," said her husband. She gave him a sexy little smile, slowly reached into her cleavage and pulled out...

HOOK · HOOK

sarg · sarg

As you well know, some of us have been known to have had brushes with the authorities on our way home from the odd social session over the years. A couple of nights ago, I was out for a few drinks with some friends at the Marriott Hotel and had a few too many beers and some rather nice red wine. Knowing ful...

sarg · sarg

----- Someone asked me what I do since I have retired.... Do I have a job? I replied, I am my wife's sexual adviser." Somewhat shocked, they said, "I beg your pardon, but what do you mean by that?" "Very simple. My wife told me that when she wants my f -----g advice, she'll ask me f...

GaryKelly · GaryKelly

See what I mean?

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	Psychology 101 (Preview) If you start with a cage containing five monkeys and inside the cage, hang a banana on a string from the top and then you place a set of stairs under the banana, before long a monkey will go to the stairs and climb toward the banana. As soon as he touches the stairs, you spray all the other monkeys with cold wa...	Hurls	2	1412	01:01 PM Jul 5, 2013 by sarg
	'' BARBIE '' ???? (Preview) this one needs no comment.....Meanwhile In Australia. One day a father gets out of work and on his way home he suddenly remembers that it's his daughter's birthday. He pulls over to a Toy Shop and asks the sales person, 'How much for one of those Barbie's in the display window?' The salesperson answers...	dazren	1	821	05:36 AM Jul 4, 2013 by grill n chill
	BID & BUY; (Preview) Warning about Bid-or-Buy Be careful what you buy on Bid-or-Buy. If you buy stuff online, check out the seller carefully. A friend, has just spent $85 plus GST on a penis enlarger. Bastards sent him a magnifying glass. The only instructions said, "Do not use in direct sunlight."	justcruisin01	1	779	11:08 PM Jul 3, 2013 by mongrel
	AUSRAIN MAGIC; (Preview) AUSTRIAN MAGICAn Austrian and a Bavarian entered a chocolate store. As they were busy looking, the Bavarian stole 3 chocolate bars. As they left the store, the Bavarian said to the Austrian, "Man I'm the best thief, I stole 3 chocolate bars and no one saw me. You can't beat that." The Austr...	justcruisin01	0	631	08:04 PM Jul 2, 2013 by justcruisin01
	the 18th camel (Preview) There was a father who left 17 camels as an asset for his three sons. When the father passed away, his sons opened up the Will. The Will of the father stated that the eldest son should get 1/2 (half) of total camels while the middle son should be given 1/3rd (one-third) and the youngest son should be given 1...	gerard gue	3	913	03:00 AM Jul 3, 2013 by sarg
	FIRST VISIT; (Preview) Baby's First Doctor Visit This made me laugh out loud. I hope it will give you a smile! A woman and a baby were in the doctor's examining room, waiting for the doctor to come in for the baby's first exam. The doctor arrived, and examined the baby, checked his weight, and being a little concerned, asked i...	justcruisin01	1	717	02:56 AM Jul 3, 2013 by sarg
	BEDRIDDEN; (Preview) While acquainting myself with a new elderly patient, I asked, 'How long have you been bedridden?' After a look of complete confusion she answered . . .. ' Why, not for about twenty years - when my husband was alive.'	justcruisin01	1	594	02:55 AM Jul 3, 2013 by sarg
	DIVORICE VS. MURDER; (Preview) DIVORCE VS. MURDER* A nice, calm and respectable lady went into the pharmacy, walked up to the pharmacist, looked straight into his eyes, and said, I would like to buy some cyanide. ' The pharmacist asked, 'Why in the world do you need cyanide?' The lady replied, 'I need it to poison my husband.' The ph...	justcruisin01	1	685	03:04 PM Jul 2, 2013 by jules47
	ARE YOU CIRCUMCISED? (Preview) ''Are you circumcised?''] A man walks into the Election office and says to the receptionist: "I would like to put my name forward for the forthcoming elections to be an Independent candidate. The receptionist replies "Certainly sir. Please fill in this form.'' He was filling the fo...	justcruisin01	2	1069	03:03 PM Jul 2, 2013 by jules47
	Sex at 68 (Preview) SEX AT 68 I just took a leaflet out of my mailbox, informing me that I can have sex at 68. I'm so happy, because I live at number 72. So it's not too far to walk home afterwards. And it's the same side of the street. I don't even have to cross the road!~~~~~ Answering machine message, "I am not available...	Hoodathunkit	1	1200	02:59 AM Jul 2, 2013 by JayDee
	Who said that men have no logic (Preview) LOGIC 101 . Woman: Do you drink beer? Man: Yes Woman: How many beers a day? Man: Usually about 3 Woman: How much do you pay per beer? Man: $5.00 which includes a tip (This is where it gets scary !) Woman: And how long have you been drinking? Man: About 20 years, I suppose Woman: So a beer costs $5 and you...	JayDee	0	783	04:47 PM Jun 28, 2013 by JayDee
	HIT MAN; (Preview) Hitman Two old friends were just about to tee off at the first hole of their local golf course when a guy carrying a golf bag called out to them, "Do you mind if I join you? My partner didn't turn up". Sure, they said, youre welcome. So they started playing and enjoyed the game and the compan...	justcruisin01	4	958	10:40 PM Jun 28, 2013 by jimbo
	Mum Knows Best (Preview) A Mom visits her son for dinner who lives with a girl roommate. During the course of the meal, his mother couldn't help but notice how pretty his roommate was.She had long been suspicious of a relationship between the two, and this had only made her more curious.... Over the course of the evening, while...	copper1	0	770	02:58 PM Jun 28, 2013 by copper1
	The Old Man (Preview) Two medical students were walking along the street when they saw an old man walking with his legs spread apart. He was stiff-legged and walking slowly. One student said to his friend: "I'm sure that poor old man has Peltry Syndrome. Those people walk just like that." The other student say...	spida	1	782	08:30 PM Jun 28, 2013 by Yendorane
	THE POWER AND MIND OF WOMAN (Preview) A woman was in town on a shopping trip. She began her day finding the most perfect shoes in the first shop and a beautiful dress on sale in the second. In the third, everything had just been reduced by 50 percent when her mobile phone rang. It was a female doctor notifying her that her husband had jus...	sarg	3	847	04:37 PM Jun 28, 2013 by dazren
	HAVE YOU EVER (Preview) She greeted him at the door dressed only in her "special occasion" bra and panties: "Have you ever seen a twenty dollar bill all crumpled up?" asked the wife. "No," said her husband. She gave him a sexy little smile, slowly reached into her cleavage and pulled out...	sarg	2	757	05:13 AM Jun 28, 2013 by justcruisin01
	Love in a cardboard box (Preview)	HOOK	4	1453	05:12 AM Jun 28, 2013 by justcruisin01
	DRINK DRIVING (Preview) As you well know, some of us have been known to have had brushes with the authorities on our way home from the odd social session over the years. A couple of nights ago, I was out for a few drinks with some friends at the Marriott Hotel and had a few too many beers and some rather nice red wine. Knowing ful...	sarg	2	690	04:14 AM Jun 28, 2013 by bowlerbear
	RETIREMENT (Preview) ----- Someone asked me what I do since I have retired.... Do I have a job? I replied, I am my wife's sexual adviser." Somewhat shocked, they said, "I beg your pardon, but what do you mean by that?" "Very simple. My wife told me that when she wants my f -----g advice, she'll ask me f...	sarg	2	795	02:32 AM Jun 28, 2013 by Wombat 280
	Seeing is Believing (Preview) See what I mean?	GaryKelly	2	781	02:31 AM Jun 28, 2013 by Wombat 280
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