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Swimming Pool
(Preview)
I got caught taking a pee in the local swimming pool today.The lifeguard shouted at me so loud, I nearly fell in.***********
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2foot6
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0
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599
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Olny srmat poelpe can raed tihs
(Preview)
Olny srmat poelpe can raed tihs . I cdnualt blveiee taht i cluod aulaclty uesdnatnrd waht i was rdanieg. The phaonmneal pweor of the hmuan mnid , Aoccdrnig to a rscheearch at cmabrigde uinervtisy,it deosn"t mttaer in waht oredr the ltteers in a word are the olny iprmoatnt tihng is taht thefrist a...
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copper1
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1
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612
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Chicken Tonight
(Preview)
A couple go for a meal at a Chinese restaurant and order the 'Chicken Surprise. The waiter brings the meal, served in a lidded cast iron pot. Just as the wife is about to serve herself, the lid of the pot rises slightly and she briefly sees two beady little eyes looking around before the lid slams back down...
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copper1
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0
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602
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THE BLACK BRA
(Preview)
The Black Bra (as told by a woman) I had lunch with 2 of my unmarried friends. One is engaged, one is a mistress, and I have been married for 20+ years. We were chatting about our relationships and decided to amaze our men by greeting them at the door wearing a black bra, stiletto heels and a mask over our ey...
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sarg
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2
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727
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How to Tell the Sex of a Fly
(Preview)
How to Tell the Sex of a Fly A woman walked into the kitchen to find her Husband stalking around with a fly swatter "What are you doing?" She asked. "Hunting Flies" He responded. "Oh. ! Killing any?" She asked. "Yep, 3 males, 2 Females," he replied. Intrigu...
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copper1
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1
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755
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AUSSIE STATS
(Preview)
A 2007 study found that the average Australian walks about 900 miles a year. Another study found that Australians drink an average of 22 gallons of beer a year. That means, on average, Australians get about 41 miles per gallon.' Bloody good value that! -- Edited by sarg on Saturday 17th of August 20...
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sarg
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1
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736
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Irish farmers
(Preview)
Two Irish farmers bought a truckload of watermelons, paying one dollar apiece for them. Then they drove to the market and sold all their melons for the same price they'd paid for them. After counting their money at the end of the day, they realise they'd ended up with no more money than they'd started wi...
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copper1
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1
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702
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To. Many wife's
(Preview)
Bloke says both my wife's died .what did the first won die of, eating poison mushrooms. the second died of a broken neck ,how come . She wouldn't, eat the mushrooms....
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MA247
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0
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620
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Down the beach
(Preview)
Two Greek blocks down the beach, joe says to George,how come you get plenty of sexy girls. george tells joe put a potato down the front of your speedos. george sees joe the next day and tells him put the potato in the front NOT THE BACK...... Alan
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MA247
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0
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564
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Working after 70...
(Preview)
This is what will happen when the Govt. forces us to work until the age of 70... http://www.youtube.com/watch_popup?v=19THRdXxmaI
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Big Gorilla
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0
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824
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The Juggler
(Preview)
Juggler is funny, but the best part is watching Tip O'Neil and Ronald Reagan laugh together, also the prank he plays on Sen Howard Baker is good stuff! https://www.youtube.com/embed/n6mbW-jMtrY?rel=0"****
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jimbo
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1
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695
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Cricket
(Preview)
There's some cruel humour going around England at the moment. The butt? Aussie cricketers of course!-What do you call an Aussie with a bottle of Champagne? A waiter. -What do you call a world-class Australian cricketer? Retired. -What do you call an Australian who can hold a catch? A fisherman. -Why...
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astroid60
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0
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612
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24 Hours of LeMons and racing camper van
(Preview)
http://www.24hoursoflemons.com/ "The 24 Hours of LeMons is restricted to cars that were purchased, fixed up, and track-prepped for a total of $500 or less. At most venues, the racing consists of tech inspection and track testing on Friday; long-ass endurance-race sessions on...
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dorian
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0
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1021
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Flight QA-747
(Preview)
Mate of mine was on a Plane going to Bali for a holiday, after the take off, The Pilot did the usual Welcome aboard ladies and gentlemen, this is flight QA-747 flying melbourne to densapar, our flight will be of 5 hours duration, and we will be cruising at 30000ft, Please sit back end enjoy the flight !Whe...
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dazren
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0
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640
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Geriatric traffic jam
(Preview)
Geriatric Traffic Jam - so funny. http://biggeekdad.com/2013/08/geriatric-traffic-jam/ Enjoy the humour in this funny clip. Turn your speakers on.
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Zoomtopz
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2
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1061
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Shared Decision Making
(Preview)
A man wakes up in the hospital bandaged from head to foot.The doctor comes in and says, Ah, I see youve regained consciousness.Now you probably wont remember, but you were in a huge pile-up on the freeway.Youre going to be okay, youll walk again and everything, however, your penis was severed in the ac...
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copper1
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0
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564
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SNOTTY RECEPTIONIST
(Preview)
SNOTTY RECEPTIONIST An older gentleman had an appointment to see the urologist who shared offices with several other doctors. The waiting room was filled with patients. As he approached the receptionist's desk, he noticed that the receptionist was a large unfriendly woman who looked l...
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copper1
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0
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709
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Tax Return
(Preview)
THIS IS PRICELESS!!! I finally received my tax return for 2012 back from the ATO. It puzzles me!!! They are questioning how many dependents I claimed. I guess it was because of my response to the question: "List all dependents." I replied: 1 million illegal immigrants; 1 million crack he...
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Hoodathunkit
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0
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577
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Always See the Big Picture
(Preview)
The Lone Ranger and Tonto went camping in the desert. After they got their tent all set up both men fell sound asleep. Some hours later Tonto wakes the Lone Ranger and says, "Kemo Sabe look towards sky, what you see?" The Lone Ranger replies "I see millions of stars..." "W...
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Nelly
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3
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726
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House of ill repute
(Preview)
House of ill reputeSee if you can work this out: There was a brothel at the top of a hill, with a large red light at the bottom of the hill.. There were four men ..... one was walking briskly up the hill; one was inside the brothel; one was walking slowly down the hill and the fourth man was sitting in his car at...
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copper1
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1
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549
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