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Orstraylian
(Preview)
The following are results from an OZ-words Competition where entrants were asked to take an Australian word, alter it by one letter only, and supply a witty definition. Clearly, you need to be an Aussie to understand. Billabonk: to make passionate love beside a waterhole Bludgie: a par...
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astroid60
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0
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776
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If only we could do this to all Bankers etc
(Preview)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=WSIUf2hD6Io
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Roving-Dutchy
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2
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727
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braless
(Preview)
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bill12
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1
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789
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Out of the mouth of babes
(Preview)
Daddy's car in the woods? Little Johnny watched his daddy's car pass by the school playground and go into the woods.Curious, he followed the car and saw Daddy and Aunt Jane in a passionate embrace. Little Johnny found this so exciting that he could hardly contain himself as he ran home and started to t...
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JayDee
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0
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579
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SOMETIMES IT'S FUNNY BECAUSE IT'S NOT ACTUALLY MEANT TO BE...
(Preview)
Two instances of funnies from real life... neither meant to be funny but hilarious because they were... Both relate to a city cousin returning to her rural roots. Jenny went for a walk through her brother-in-law's garden. A little bit later, he came out to find her in the middle of his pea patch. Jenny...
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Chazza
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0
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610
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Police: Australia, Canada & USA
(Preview)
Subject: Police: Australia. Canada, USA. How do you tell the difference between an Australian Police Officer, a Canadian Police Officer and an American Police Officer? QUESTION: You're on duty by yourself (don't ask why, you just are and your Sergeant hates you) walking on...
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Hurls
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0
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991
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Computer update problems
(Preview)
Dear Technical support, 18 months ago, I upgraded to Girlfriend 1.0 from Drinking Mates4.2, which I had used for years without any trouble. However, there are apparently conflicts between these two products and the only solution was to try and run Girlfriend 1.0 with the sound turned off. To make ma...
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spida
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2
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636
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ED THE CHICKEN
(Preview)
Ed the Chicken Ed came home drunk one night, slid into bed beside his sleeping wife, and fell into a deep slumber. He awoke before the Pearly Gates, where St. Peter said, 'You died in your sleep, Ed.' Ed was stunned. 'I'm dead? No, I can't be! I've Got too much to live for. Send me back!' St. Peter said, 'I'...
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sarg
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0
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640
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FIRST DATE
(Preview)
A young Italian girl was going on a date. Her Nonna said: 'Sita here ana letame tella you about this-a younga boy. He's agonna try ana kiss you, you are agonna likea dat, but don't let him do dat. He's agonna try ana kiss your breasts, you are agonna likeadat too, but don'ta let him do dat eeda. But mosta i...
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sarg
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0
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695
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Fertilizer egg business
(Preview)
John the farmer was in the fertilized egg business. He had several hundred young layers (hens), called 'pullets', and ten roosters, whose job it was to fertilize the eggs. The farmer kept records and any rooster that didn't perform went into the soup pot and was replaced. That took an awful lot of his...
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Legendts
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0
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607
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THE THREE BEARS;
(Preview)
New Version of the Three Bears Story . A far more accurate account of the events of that fateful morning.... Baby bear goes downstairs, sits in his small chair at the table. He looks into his small bowl. It is empty. 'Who's been eating my porridge?' he squeaks. Daddy Bear arrives at the big table and sit...
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justcruisin01
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1
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739
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THE MATING CALL;
(Preview)
Mating call Two Red Indians and an Irishman were walking through the woods. All of a sudden one of the Indians ran up a hill to the mouth of a small cave. 'Wooooo! Wooooo! Wooooo!' he called into the cave and listened closely until he heard an answering, 'Wooooo! Wooooo! Woooooo! He then tore off hi...
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justcruisin01
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0
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603
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CATHOLIC HORSES;
(Preview)
CATHOLIC HORSES A punter (gambler) was at the horse races playing the ponies and all but losing his shirt. He noticed a Priest step out onto the track and bless the forehead of one of the horses lining up for the 4th race. Lo and behold, that horse - a very long shot - won the race. Next race, as the horses li...
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justcruisin01
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0
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770
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WOODPECKERS;
(Preview)
*Two Woodpeckers* This Mexican woodpecker and a Canadian woodpecker were inMexico arguing about which country had the toughest trees. The Mexican woodpecker claimed Mexico had a tree that no woodpecker could peck. The Canadian woodpecker accepted his challenge and promptly pecked a hole in t...
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justcruisin01
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0
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636
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NEIGHBOURS DOG;
(Preview)
Paddy and his wife are lying in bed and the neighbours' dog is barking like mad in the garden. Paddy says "To hell with this!" and storms off. He comes back upstairs 5 minutes later and his wife asks "What did you do?" Paddy replies "I've put the dog in our garden. Let's see how...
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justcruisin01
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0
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630
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PADDY & MURPHY;
(Preview)
Paddy and Murphy are working on a building site. Paddy says to Murphy "I'm gonna have the day off. I'm gonna pretend I'm mad!" He climbs up the rafters, hangs upside down and shouts "I'M A LIGHT BULB! I'M A LIGHT BULB!" Murphy watches in amazement! The Foreman shouts "Paddy...
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justcruisin01
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0
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551
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PADDY;
(Preview)
Paddy calls Easyjet to book a flight. The operator asks "How many people are flying with you?" Paddy replies "I don't know! It's your bloody plane!"
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justcruisin01
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0
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532
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HOLEY MOLEY
(Preview)
A papa mole, a mama mole, and a baby mole, all live together in a little mole hole. One day, papa mole sticks his head out of the hole, sniffs the air and said, ' Yummy! I smell maple syrup!' ...
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sarg
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0
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584
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Psychology 101
(Preview)
If you start with a cage containing five monkeys and inside the cage, hang a banana on a string from the top and then you place a set of stairs under the banana, before long a monkey will go to the stairs and climb toward the banana. As soon as he touches the stairs, you spray all the other monkeys with cold wa...
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Hurls
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2
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1450
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'' BARBIE '' ????
(Preview)
this one needs no comment.....Meanwhile In Australia. One day a father gets out of work and on his way home he suddenly remembers that it's his daughter's birthday. He pulls over to a Toy Shop and asks the sales person, 'How much for one of those Barbie's in the display window?' The salesperson answers...
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dazren
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1
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825
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