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TRUE BLUE AUSSIE'S
(Preview)
The way we do it in Australia!!!!!!!! This morning I was in luck and was able to buy two boxes of VB beer cheap at the local supermarket. I placed the boxes on the front seat and headed back home. I stopped at a service station where a drop-dead gorgeous blonde in a short skirt was filling up her car at the nex...
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Gunsondeck
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1
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854
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Grumpy old men can fix Australia
(Preview)
Dear Mr. Abbot as the official replacement for Mr Rudd, Please find below our suggestion for fixing Australia 's economy. Instead of giving billions of dollars to car companies & other bussiness that will squander the money on lavish parties and unearned bonuses, use the following p...
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Gunsondeck
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5
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1516
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Paper is Dead
(Preview)
http://www.youtube.com/embed/V_gOZDWQj3Q?rel=0 G.
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Gunsondeck
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2
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750
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A guy goes hunting.....
(Preview)
A guy goes hunting. A gust of wind blew. The gun fell over and discharged, shooting him in the genitals. Several hours later, lying in a hospital bed, he was approached by his doctor. "Well sir, I have some good news and some bad news. The good news is that you are going to be OK. The damage was local to...
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valiant81
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1
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969
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KIWIS
(Preview)
A bloke walks into a bar in New Zealand and orders a shandy. All the Kiwis sitting around the bar look up, expecting to see another Australian visitor. The barman says, "You ain't from around here, are ya?" The guy says, "No, I'm from Canada ." The bartender says, "What d...
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sarg
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1
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685
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* * * * * * IRISH GOLFER * * * * * *
(Preview)
A golfer playing in Ireland hookedhisdrive into the woods. Looking for his ball,he found a littleLeprechaun flat on his back,a big bump on his head and the golfer'sballbeside him. Horrified, the golfer got his water bottle fromthe cart and poured it over the littl...
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sarg
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2
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883
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ONLY THREE TIMES !!!
(Preview)
Only Three Times A couple was having dinner one evening when the husband reached across the table, took his wife's hand in his and said, "Beth, soon we will be married 30 years, and there's something I have to know. In all of these 30 years, have you ever been unfaithful to me?" Beth replied...
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justcruisin01
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3
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950
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THE OVER WEIGHT IRISHMAN :;
(Preview)
An Irishman was terribly overweight, so his doctor put him on a diet.'I want you to eat regularly for 2 days, then skip a day, and repeat this procedure for 2 weeks.The next time I see you, you should have lost at least 5 pounds.When the Irishman returned, he shocked the doctor by having lost nearly 60lb...
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justcruisin01
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1
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821
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First Drink
(Preview)
I was reading an article last night about fathers and sons and memories came flooding back of the time I took my son out for his first pint. Got him a Coopers Pale Ale ...... he didn't like it - I had it. Then I got him Carlsberg, he didn't like it so I had it. It was the same with Guinness and Cider....
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Hurls
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2
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687
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What goes up hill with 3 legs?
(Preview)
"Don't mess with us old people." A lawyer and a senior citizen are sitting next to each other on a long flight. The lawyer is thinking that seniors are so dumb that he could put one over on them easily. So, the lawyer asks if the senior would like to play a fun game. The senior is tired and just wan...
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sherbert
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1
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901
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Have a Safe Christmas
(Preview)
Have a great Christmas season but please also take care. With the holidays upon us I would like to share a personal experience with you about drinking and driving. As you may know some of us have been known to have brushes with the authorities from time to time on the way home after a "social sessi...
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Hurls
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3
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805
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Medical advice
(Preview)
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rockylizard
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1
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796
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Lost Blonde
(Preview)
A blonde gets lost in Sydney and calls the NRMA for directions. The operator asks which cross streets she's at. The blonde replies, "I'm on the corner of 'Walk' and 'Do Not Walk.' "
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copper1
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0
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701
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A blonde in church
(Preview)
An Alabama pastor said to his congregation, "Someone in this congregation has spread a rumor that I belong to the Ku Klux Klan. This is a horrible lie and one which a Christian community cannot tolera...
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sarg
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0
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705
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FIFTY SHADES OF GREY - (a husband's point of view)
(Preview)
By Pam Ayres of course.. The missus bought a Paperback, down Shepton Mallet way, I had a look inside her bag; ... T'was "Fifty Shades of Grey". Well I just left her to it, And at ten I went to bed. An hour later she appeared; The sight filled me w...
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sarg
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0
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814
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The confessional box
(Preview)
A guy goes into the confessional box after years being away from the Church. He pulls aside the curtain, enters and sits himself down. There's a fully equipped bar with crystal glasses, the best wine, Guinness on tap, cigars and chocolates nearby, and on the wall a fine photographic display of bu...
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reglynn
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1
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762
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The Portsmouth Woman
(Preview)
A young Portsmouth woman was so depressed that she decided to end her life by throwing herself into the sea, but just before she could throw herself from the wharf, a handsome young man stopped her. "You have so much to live for," said the man. "I'm a sailor, and we are off to Australi...
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reglynn
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0
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606
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Christmas time
(Preview)
It's a romantic full moon, when Pedro said, "Hey, mamacita, let's do Weeweechu." Oh no, not now, let's look at the moon!" said Rosita. Oh, c'mon baby, let's you and I do Weeweechu. I love you and it's the perfect time," Pedro begged. "But I wanna just hold your hand and watch...
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barina
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1
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686
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A Christmas Story (oldie but goodie)
(Preview)
A little story to start your Christmas season in the right spirit. When four of Santa's elves got sick, the trainee elves did not produce toys as fast as the regular ones, and Santa began to feel the Pre-Christmas pressure. Then Mrs. Claus told Santa her Mother was coming to visit, which stressed Santa...
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GaryKelly
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1
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767
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1st Christmas Joke
(Preview)
First Christmas Joke Three men died on Christmas Eve and were met by Saint Peter at the pearly gates. 'In honor of this holy season' Saint Peter said, 'You must each possess something that symbolizes Christmas to get into heaven.' The Englishman fumbled through his pockets and pulled out a lighter. H...
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Hurls
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0
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772
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