Just Joking

petengail · petengail

I walked into a pub and said to the barman, "XXXX please mate." He said, "Are you 18?" I said, "No." He said, "I can't serve you then." As I walked out I thought to myself, "This is the fourth pub - what does a 22 year old have to do to get a beer round here?...

petengail · petengail

Secrets to a Happy Marriage 1. It is important to find a woman that cooks and cleans. 2. It is important to find a woman that makes good money. 3. It is important to find a woman that likes to have sex. and MOST important... 4. It is important that these three women never meet

jules47 · jules47

Cracked me up!!

Olley46 · Olley46

Three strings walk into a bar two sit at the table one goes to the bar,three pots thanks the barman said we don't serve strings here,so back to the table tells his mates second one says I will try up to the bar three pots thanks the barman says I told your mate we don't serve strings here back to the table he go...

Olley46 · Olley46

A lizard walks into a bar and says one beer thanks ,the barman says we have a drink named after you,and the lizard Said what David. Lance C

Olley46 · Olley46

A lady walks into a bar and said to the barman three pots thanks ,barman sets up three pots she drinks two pots and tips the third one over her shoulder,this happened again,the barman couldn't help himself and asked why she would drink two and tip the third one over her shoulder, she said I just won tatt...

Duh · Duh

Subject: .... Hymn 365.. A minister was completing a temperance sermon and with great emphasis he said, 'If I had all the beer in the world, I'd take it and pour it into the river.' With even greater emphasis he said, 'And if I had all the wine in the world, I'd take it and pour it into the river.' And then fin...

gerard gue · gerard gue

A little girl asks her mum, 'Mum, can I take the dog for a walk around the block?' Her mum replies 'No, because she is on heat.' 'What does that mean?' asked the child. 'Go and ask your father. I think he's in the garage.' The little girl goes out to the garage and says, 'Dad, can I take Lulu for a w...

clazandaza · clazandaza

astroid60 · astroid60

Drugs in sport - an obvious playing with negative stereo-types about lawn bowls; and an obvious follow-on from drug issues in other Australian sports!! However I did grin at some statements. Hope this is not too offensive!! Lawn bowls is a hotbed of drug use, with sports scientists using all sorts o...

Hoodathunkit · Hoodathunkit

Please count the people below, wait for the picture to change then count them again. Count them and wait! Count them again after the picture has changed . This will drive you crazy! WHERE DOES THE EXTRA MAN COME FROM?

Duh · Duh

Hoodathunkit · Hoodathunkit

Somebody finally made an orthopedic bed just for MEN. No more snoring again - will be sleeping on stomach 99% of the time. Description: 0B2BFF9FC05D4C73977519304D39F502@bvo9a5d223b05e Can be ordered in three firmness levels..."saline, silicone or natural" - in sizes C - DDDD... An...

Bassett52 · Bassett52

An Irishman who was very much overweight, went to his doctor who suggested a diet as follows: 'I want you to eat regularly for two days then skip a day and repeat this procedure for two weeks. The next time I see you, you should have lost at least five pounds. When the Irishman returned, he shocked the doct...

Hoodathunkit · Hoodathunkit

Technology has gone so far we no longer need doctors thank goodness. A doctor could not tell you this! One day, in line at the company cafeteria, Joe says to Mike, "My elbow hurts like hell. I guess I'd better see a doctor." "Listen, you don't have to spend that kind of money," Mi...

Hoodathunkit · Hoodathunkit

It all makes sense now. Gay marriage & marijuana being legalized on the same day. Leviticus 20:13- "If a man lays with another man he should be stoned." We were just interpreting it wrong.

Hoodathunkit · Hoodathunkit

Subject: SCOTTISH GOLF CLUB MEMBERSHIP APPLICATION An elderly Scottish Jew has decided to take it a little easier and take up golf, so he puts his name down at the local club. After a week he receives a message that his application has been turned down. So he goes down to the club to inquire why. Secr...

Hoodathunkit · Hoodathunkit

Drivers LicenseMy neighbor was working in his yard when he was startled by a late model car that came crashing through his hedge and ended up in his front lawn.He rushed to help an elderly lady driver out of the car and sat her down on a lawn chair "My goodness," he said with excitement, "...

Duh · Duh

Four old retired guys are walking down a street in Yuma , Arizona . They turn a corner and see a sign that says, "Old Timers Bar - ALL drinks 10 cents." They look at each other and then go in, thinking, This is too good to be true. The old bartender says in a voice that carries across the room, "...

Pete49 · Pete49

I dont normally post links as I find it irritating but this one is a laugh ...best of all nobody got hurt or used foul language probably laughing too hard http://www.flixxy.com/wedding-ceremony..htm Pete

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	Getting a beer (Preview) I walked into a pub and said to the barman, "XXXX please mate." He said, "Are you 18?" I said, "No." He said, "I can't serve you then." As I walked out I thought to myself, "This is the fourth pub - what does a 22 year old have to do to get a beer round here?...	petengail	1	706	02:43 AM Mar 15, 2013 by Pam
	Secrets to a happy marriage (Preview) Secrets to a Happy Marriage 1. It is important to find a woman that cooks and cleans. 2. It is important to find a woman that makes good money. 3. It is important to find a woman that likes to have sex. and MOST important... 4. It is important that these three women never meet	petengail	1	663	12:33 AM Mar 15, 2013 by Pinto
	Popes Farewell (Preview) Cracked me up!!	jules47	4	897	12:03 PM Mar 14, 2013 by Magnarc
	Three strings (Preview) Three strings walk into a bar two sit at the table one goes to the bar,three pots thanks the barman said we don't serve strings here,so back to the table tells his mates second one says I will try up to the bar three pots thanks the barman says I told your mate we don't serve strings here back to the table he go...	Olley46	0	623	12:14 AM Mar 14, 2013 by Olley46
	Lizard (Preview) A lizard walks into a bar and says one beer thanks ,the barman says we have a drink named after you,and the lizard Said what David. Lance C	Olley46	0	752	12:01 AM Mar 14, 2013 by Olley46
	Drinks at the bar (Preview) A lady walks into a bar and said to the barman three pots thanks ,barman sets up three pots she drinks two pots and tips the third one over her shoulder,this happened again,the barman couldn't help himself and asked why she would drink two and tip the third one over her shoulder, she said I just won tatt...	Olley46	0	563	11:54 PM Mar 13, 2013 by Olley46
	Hymn 365...... (Preview) Subject: .... Hymn 365.. A minister was completing a temperance sermon and with great emphasis he said, 'If I had all the beer in the world, *I'd take it and pour it into the river.'* With even greater emphasis he said, 'And if I had all the wine in the world, *I'd take it and pour it into the river.'* And then fin...	Duh	3	903	01:10 AM Mar 14, 2013 by jules47
	on heat (Preview) A little girl asks her mum, 'Mum, can I take the dog for a walk around the block?' Her mum replies 'No, because she is on heat.' 'What does that mean?' asked the child. 'Go and ask your father. I think he's in the garage.' The little girl goes out to the garage and says, 'Dad, can I take Lulu for a w...	gerard gue	0	605	08:36 PM Mar 12, 2013 by gerard gue
	Great T shirt (Preview)	clazandaza	2	742	05:40 PM Mar 10, 2013 by GaryKelly
	Lawn Bowlers (Preview) Drugs in sport - an obvious playing with negative stereo-types about lawn bowls; and an obvious follow-on from drug issues in other Australian sports!! However I did grin at some statements. Hope this is not too offensive!! Lawn bowls is a hotbed of drug use, with sports scientists using all sorts o...	astroid60	2	1225	12:37 AM Mar 9, 2013 by Rip and Rosie
	This will drive you crazy (Preview) Please count the people below, wait for the picture to change then count them again. Count them and wait! Count them again after the picture has changed . This will drive you crazy! WHERE DOES THE EXTRA MAN COME FROM?	Hoodathunkit	5	910	08:52 PM Mar 8, 2013 by mongrel
	What Do We Want !!! (Preview)	Duh	0	740	10:37 PM Mar 7, 2013 by Duh
	Mattress just for men (Preview) Somebody finally made an orthopedic bed just for MEN. No more snoring again - will be sleeping on stomach 99% of the time. Description: 0B2BFF9FC05D4C73977519304D39F502@bvo9a5d223b05e Can be ordered in three firmness levels..."saline, silicone or natural" - in sizes C - DDDD... An...	Hoodathunkit	2	928	05:12 AM Mar 8, 2013 by Pete49
	Irish Diet (Preview) An Irishman who was very much overweight, went to his doctor who suggested a diet as follows: 'I want you to eat regularly for two days then skip a day and repeat this procedure for two weeks. The next time I see you, you should have lost at least five pounds. When the Irishman returned, he shocked the doct...	Bassett52	2	903	03:58 AM Mar 8, 2013 by Kaid
	Aldi Doctor (Preview) Technology has gone so far we no longer need doctors thank goodness. A doctor could not tell you this! One day, in line at the company cafeteria, Joe says to Mike, "My elbow hurts like hell. I guess I'd better see a doctor." "Listen, you don't have to spend that kind of money," Mi...	Hoodathunkit	0	748	06:14 PM Mar 7, 2013 by Hoodathunkit
	It all makes sense now. (Preview) It all makes sense now. Gay marriage & marijuana being legalized on the same day. Leviticus 20:13- "If a man lays with another man he should be stoned." We were just interpreting it wrong.	Hoodathunkit	0	609	06:06 PM Mar 7, 2013 by Hoodathunkit
	SCOTTISH GOLF CLUB MEMBERSHIP APPLICATION (Preview) Subject: SCOTTISH GOLF CLUB MEMBERSHIP APPLICATION An elderly Scottish Jew has decided to take it a little easier and take up golf, so he puts his name down at the local club. After a week he receives a message that his application has been turned down. So he goes down to the club to inquire why. Secr...	Hoodathunkit	0	750	06:04 PM Mar 7, 2013 by Hoodathunkit
	Drivers License (Preview) Drivers LicenseMy neighbor was working in his yard when he was startled by a late model car that came crashing through his hedge and ended up in his front lawn.He rushed to help an elderly lady driver out of the car and sat her down on a lawn chair "My goodness," he said with excitement, "...	Hoodathunkit	0	802	05:49 PM Mar 7, 2013 by Hoodathunkit
	Old Timers Bar & 4 Old Guys (Preview) Four old retired guys are walking down a street in Yuma , Arizona . They turn a corner and see a sign that says, "Old Timers Bar - ALL drinks 10 cents." They look at each other and then go in, thinking, This is too good to be true. The old bartender says in a voice that carries across the room, "...	Duh	2	853	02:08 AM Mar 7, 2013 by Duh
	wedding (Preview) I dont normally post links as I find it irritating but this one is a laugh ...best of all nobody got hurt or used foul language probably laughing too hard http://www.flixxy.com/wedding-ceremony..htm Pete	Pete49	2	1211	06:03 AM Mar 5, 2013 by bronnie
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