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Pianist
(Preview)
Did you hear about the classical pianist who was not a good speller? When she went out to buy something she left a sign on her door that said: "Out Chopin. Be Bach in a minuet
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rockylizard
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0
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722
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New Exercise Routine
(Preview)
The older we get the more important it is to incorporate exercise intoour daily routine. This is necessary to maintain cardiovascular healthand maintain muscle mass.If you're over 40, you might want to take it easy at first, then domore repetitions as you become more proficient and build stamina....
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vk6tnc
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0
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749
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Diamonds
(Preview)
I asked my wife what she would like for a Christmas present, she replied quote " something thats got lots of diamonds" I have just bought her a beautiful pack of playing cards.
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vk6tnc
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0
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709
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Gangnam
(Preview)
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rockylizard
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0
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731
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PATRICK;
(Preview)
Patrick walks into abar in Dublin, Orders three pints ofGuinness & sits in thecorner of the room, Drinking a sip out ofeach pint in turn. When he had finished all three, He went back to the bar & ordered three more. The barman says,"You know a pint goes flat soon after I pull it .......... Y...
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justcruisin01
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0
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738
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Nude Beach
(Preview)
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Recoup
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0
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1421
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Smart Cat
(Preview)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QrlTijuhVOA&feature=endscreen&NR=1
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tcp99
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0
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825
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Dentist
(Preview)
A bloke went to the dentist and found he'd have to have a tooth extracted. The dentist prepared to give him an injection but he refused, saying he hated needles. She offered him a mouthwash to deaden the area but he didn't like the taste and refused. Eventually, she asked him if he could handle tablets. W...
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extreme potato
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0
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646
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good news bad news
(Preview)
A BLOKE WAKES UP IN HOSPITAL,HE SAYS TO THE DOCTOR ''WHAT HAPPENED TO ME,I DONT REMEMBER ANYTHING.'' THE DOCTOR TELLS HIM HE BEEN INVOLVED IN A SERIOUS CAR ACCIDENT AND HAS BEEN IN A COMA FOR THE LAST WEEK. ''AM I GOING TO BE OK'' HE ASKS THE DOCTOR. THE DOCTOR SAYS '' YOU WILL RECOVER BUT I HAVE SOME GOOD NE...
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rowdy
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0
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669
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Universal Solution
(Preview)
Medicare Part X New Medicare Program You're a sick senior citizen and the government says there is no nursing home available for you. So what do you do? Our plan gives anyone 65 years or older a gun and 4 bullets. You are allowed to shoot four Politicians. Of course, this means you will be sent to prison wh...
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Hoodathunkit
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3
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813
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Fifty Shades of Grey Hair
(Preview)
Fifty Shades of Grey Hair The missus bought a Paperback down Dymocks, Saturday, I had a look in her bag; ...Twas fifty shades of grey. Well I just left her to it, At ten I went to bed. An hour later she appeared; The sight filled me with dread.. In her left hand she held a rope; And in her right a whip! She threw...
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sucastja
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0
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767
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If you like pointers and pointing
(Preview)
http://www.pointerpointer.com/
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tcp99
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4
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1013
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Who is Jack Schitt?
(Preview)
.> WHO IS JACK SCHITT?
>
> For some time you may have wondered just who is Jack Schitt? You find
> yourselves at a loss when someone says, 'You don't know Jack Schitt!'
>
> Well, thanks to my genealogy efforts, you can now respond in an
> intellectual way.
>
> Jack...
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sucastja
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1
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736
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A Tortoise Life for Me
(Preview)
. If walking is good for your health, the postman would be immortal. . A whale swims all day, only eats fish, drinks water, and is fat. . A rabbit runs and hops and only lives for 15 years. A tortoise doesn't run and does nothing, yet it lives for 450 years. And you want me to exercise?? I dont think so I'm ret...
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Beatle
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1
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786
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Puns for Educated Minds
(Preview)
How does Moses make his tea? Hebrews it.Venison for dinner again? Oh deer!A cartoonist was found dead in his home. Details are sketchy.I used to be a banker, but then I lost interest.Haunted French pancakes give me the crepes.England has no kidney bank, but it does have a Liverpool.I tried to catch...
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gerard gue
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2
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1313
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24 Hours to Live
(Preview)
Morris returns from the doctor and tells his wife that the Doctor has told him that he has only 24 hours to live. Given the prognosis, Morris asks his wife for sex. Naturally, she agrees, so they make love. About 6 hours later, the husband goes to his wife and says, 'Honey, you know I now have only 18 hours t...
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CK56
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2
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853
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Why?
(Preview)
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tcp99
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2
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811
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RELIGIOUS BRAS
(Preview)
Do you need a laugh?? What Religion is Your Bra? A man walked into the ladies underwear department of Marks & Spencer and shyly walked up to an assistant and said, "I'd like to buy a bra for my wife." "What type of bra?"asked the clerk. "Type?" inquires the man, &...
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gerard gue
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2
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1165
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Glow in the Dark
(Preview)
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jules47
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2
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866
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Olympic bloopers
(Preview)
Here are the top nine comments made by sports commentators during the Summer Olympics , that they would like to take back: 1. Weightlifting commentator: "This is Gregoriava from Bulgaria . I saw her snatch this morning during her warm up and it was amazing." 2. Dressage commentator: &qu...
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Zoomtopz
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4
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985
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