Just Joking

dazren · dazren

Dear Dorothy Dix My partner has a long record of money problems. She runs up hugecredit-card bills and at the end of the month, if I try to pay them off,she shouts at me, saying I am stealing her money. She says pay the minimumand let the next lot worry about the rest, but already we can hardly keepup wit...

sarg · sarg

A chemist walks back into his shop after a short break and sees a man leaning against the wall. "What's wrong with him?" he asks his assistant "He came in for cough syrup but I couldn't find any so I gave him an entire bottle of laxatives" replied the assistant. "You f---...

sarg · sarg

Tiger Woods & Stevie Wonder are in a bar... Tiger turns to Stevie and says, "How's the singing career going?" Stevie replies, "Not too bad. How's the golf?" Woods replies, "Not too bad, I've had some problems with my swing, but I think I've got that fixed, now.&qu...

JayDee · JayDee

To keep "aging" grey cells active!Something for seniors to do to keep those "aging" grey cells active! 1. Johnny's mother had three children. The first child was named April. The second child was named May ...What was the third child's name? 2. There is a clerk at the butcher...

sarg · sarg

A mother and father take their 6-year old son to a nude beach. As the boy walks along the sand, he notices that many of the women have boobs bigger than his mother's, so he goes back to ask her why. She tells her son, 'The bigger they are, the sillier the lady is.' The boy, pleased with the answer, goes to p...

GaryKelly · GaryKelly

Dear God, please send lots of clothes to all those poor ladies on grandad's computer. Amen.

Chazza · Chazza

Race day at Cunnamulla. Crowds of people everywhere you look. A bloke pushes his way through the people around one of the bookies. "M-m-mate," he stutters, "I b-b-backed a f-f-five t-t-to..." "Go on, get out of the way will you?" the bookie responds. "Can't y...

sarg · sarg

A tourist in Vienna is going through a graveyard and all of a sudden he hears music. No one is around, so he starts searching for the source. He finally locates the origin and finds it is coming from a grave with a headstone that reads "Ludwig van Beethoven, 1770-1827". Then he realizes t...

copper1 · copper1

*Coffee with the Pope* Nescafe manages to arrange a meeting with the pope at the Vatican.After receiving the papal blessing, the Nescafe official whispers, "Your Eminence, we have an offer for you. Nescafe is prepared to donate $100 million to the church if you change the Lord's Prayer from '...

GaryKelly · GaryKelly

Have you ever seen a van parked in a camping area that was rocking, and wondered what was going on inside? Here's one version.

jules47 · jules47

If you had sex every night for 365 days, then boiled all the rubbers you used down to make a tyre - what would you have? A bloody Goodyear!!!!!

Duh · Duh

A few years after I was born, my Dad met a stranger who was new to our small town. From the beginning, Dad was fascinated with this enchanting newcomer and soon invited him to live with our family. The stranger was quickly accepted and was around from then on. As I grew up, I never questioned his place in my...

justcruisin01 · justcruisin01

Blonde says to daughter; I taught here every thing I know! & she stills knows nothing. JC.

jimbo · jimbo

FOR ALL THE LOVERS . . .* He was in ecstasy with a huge smile on his face as his wife moved forwards, then backwards, forward, then backwards again...back and forth...back and forth. ..in and out...in and out She could feel the sweat on her forehead and between her breasts and trickling down the small of...

justcruisin01 · justcruisin01

THE GAY FLIGHT ATTENDANT: My flight was being served by an obviously gay flight attendant, who seemed to put everyone in a good mood as he served us food and drinks. As the plane prepared to descend, he came swishing down the aisle and told us that 'Captain Marvey has asked me to announce that he'll be lan...

Chazza · Chazza

This is an all-time classic poem based on the manner in which Australians apply a certain adjective in a loosely integrated manner. It is a characteristic that leaves our Anglo cousins bemused... and the Seppos totally dumbfounded. You'll know it when you read it. THE INTEGRATED ADJECTIVE by John...

Magnarc · Magnarc

There was a young man from Tonnorn, Who wished he had never been born, He wouldn't have been if his daddy had seen, That the end of his franger was torn. ( No offence intended) -- Edited by Magnarc on Tuesday 18th of June 2013 01:43:14 PM

Magnarc · Magnarc

A little old manshuffled slowly into an ice cream parlour and pulled himself slowly, painfully, up onto a stool... After catching his breath, he ordered a banana split. The waitress asked kindly, 'Crushed nuts?' 'No,' he replied, 'Arthritis.'

sarg · sarg

Why Some Men Have a Dog And No Wife: 1. The later you are, the more excited your dogs are to see you. 2. Dogs don't notice if you call them by another dog's name. 3. Dogs like it if you leave a lot of things on the floor. 4. A dog's parents never visit. 5. Dogs agree that you have to raise your...

Chazza · Chazza

It's not new but I heard it again today and thought it worth repeating: A bloke goes into a Saloon Bar for a drink on the way home. It's very quiet and he chats with the barman. As they chat, he realises the most incredibly beautiful piano music is being played nearby. He asks the barman where the piano rec...

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	dorothy dix (Preview) Dear Dorothy Dix My partner has a long record of money problems. She runs up hugecredit-card bills and at the end of the month, if I try to pay them off,she shouts at me, saying I am stealing her money. She says pay the minimumand let the next lot worry about the rest, but already we can hardly keepup wit...	dazren	0	733	12:29 AM Jun 23, 2013 by dazren
	DONT COUGH (Preview) A chemist walks back into his shop after a short break and sees a man leaning against the wall. "What's wrong with him?" he asks his assistant "He came in for cough syrup but I couldn't find any so I gave him an entire bottle of laxatives" replied the assistant. "You f---...	sarg	1	784	11:13 PM Jun 22, 2013 by GaryKelly
	GOLF WITH STEVIE WONDER (Preview) Tiger Woods & Stevie Wonder are in a bar... Tiger turns to Stevie and says, "How's the singing career going?" Stevie replies, "Not too bad. How's the golf?" Woods replies, "Not too bad, I've had some problems with my swing, but I think I've got that fixed, now.&qu...	sarg	0	716	04:10 AM Jun 22, 2013 by sarg
	Test your IG. (Preview) *To keep "aging" grey cells active!Something for seniors to do to keep those "aging" grey cells active!* 1. Johnny's mother had three children. The first child was named April. The second child was named May ...What was the third child's name?** 2. There is a clerk at the butcher...	JayDee	0	783	02:22 AM Jun 22, 2013 by JayDee
	SILLY DADDY (Preview) A mother and father take their 6-year old son to a nude beach. As the boy walks along the sand, he notices that many of the women have boobs bigger than his mother's, so he goes back to ask her why. She tells her son, 'The bigger they are, the sillier the lady is.' The boy, pleased with the answer, goes to p...	sarg	0	792	01:57 AM Jun 22, 2013 by sarg
	A Prayer for Grandpa (Preview) Dear God, please send lots of clothes to all those poor ladies on grandad's computer. Amen.	GaryKelly	2	782	07:22 PM Jun 21, 2013 by GaryKelly
	RACE DAY AT CUNNAMULLA (Preview) Race day at Cunnamulla. Crowds of people everywhere you look. A bloke pushes his way through the people around one of the bookies. "M-m-mate," he stutters, "I b-b-backed a f-f-five t-t-to..." "Go on, get out of the way will you?" the bookie responds. "Can't y...	Chazza	1	869	04:34 PM Jun 21, 2013 by GaryKelly
	MUSIC (Preview) A tourist in Vienna is going through a graveyard and all of a sudden he hears music. No one is around, so he starts searching for the source. He finally locates the origin and finds it is coming from a grave with a headstone that reads "Ludwig van Beethoven, 1770-1827". Then he realizes t...	sarg	1	683	03:58 PM Jun 21, 2013 by Chazza
	Coffee with the Pope (Preview) Coffee with the Pope Nescafe manages to arrange a meeting with the pope at the Vatican.After receiving the papal blessing, the Nescafe official whispers, "Your Eminence, we have an offer for you. Nescafe is prepared to donate $100 million to the church if you change the Lord's Prayer from '...	copper1	1	944	01:36 PM Jun 21, 2013 by sarg
	Rocking caravan (Preview) Have you ever seen a van parked in a camping area that was rocking, and wondered what was going on inside? Here's one version.	GaryKelly	1	766	12:51 PM Jun 21, 2013 by Zoomtopz
	Rubber Tyres (Preview) If you had sex every night for 365 days, then boiled all the rubbers you used down to make a tyre - what would you have? A bloody Goodyear!!!!!	jules47	1	755	08:42 PM Jun 20, 2013 by dazren
	The Stranger.... (Preview) A few years after I was born, my Dad met a stranger who was new to our small town. From the beginning, Dad was fascinated with this enchanting newcomer and soon invited him to live with our family. The stranger was quickly accepted and was around from then on. As I grew up, I never questioned his place in my...	Duh	1	892	04:11 PM Jun 20, 2013 by Peterpan
	THINK ABOUT THIS; (Preview) Blonde says to daughter; I taught here every thing I know! & she stills knows nothing. JC.	justcruisin01	0	688	03:06 AM Jun 20, 2013 by justcruisin01
	For all the Lovers (Preview) FOR ALL THE LOVERS . . .* He was in ecstasy with a huge smile on his face as his wife moved forwards, then backwards, forward, then backwards again...back and forth...back and forth. ..in and out...in and out She could feel the sweat on her forehead and between her breasts and trickling down the small of...	jimbo	0	718	10:45 PM Jun 19, 2013 by jimbo
	THE GAY FLIGHT ATTENDANT; (Preview) THE GAY FLIGHT ATTENDANT: My flight was being served by an obviously gay flight attendant, who seemed to put everyone in a good mood as he served us food and drinks. As the plane prepared to descend, he came swishing down the aisle and told us that 'Captain Marvey has asked me to announce that he'll be lan...	justcruisin01	2	1570	12:34 AM Jun 20, 2013 by GaryKelly
	THE INTEGRATED ADJECTIVE by John O'Grady (Preview) This is an all-time classic poem based on the manner in which Australians apply a certain adjective in a loosely integrated manner. It is a characteristic that leaves our Anglo cousins bemused... and the Seppos totally dumbfounded. You'll know it when you read it. THE INTEGRATED ADJECTIVE by John...	Chazza	1	1741	06:09 PM Jun 19, 2013 by jules47
	Dirty ditty (Preview) There was a young man from Tonnorn, Who wished he had never been born, He wouldn't have been if his daddy had seen, That the end of his franger was torn. ( No offence intended) -- Edited by Magnarc on Tuesday 18th of June 2013 01:43:14 PM	Magnarc	2	736	03:56 PM Jun 19, 2013 by Magnarc
	Oh dear! (Preview) A little old manshuffled slowly into an ice cream parlour and pulled himself slowly, painfully, up onto a stool... After catching his breath, he ordered a banana split. The waitress asked kindly, 'Crushed nuts?' 'No,' he replied, 'Arthritis.'	Magnarc	2	734	07:52 PM Jun 18, 2013 by Magnarc
	ITS A DOGS LIFE (Preview) Why Some Men Have a Dog And No Wife: 1. The later you are, the more excited your dogs are to see you. 2. Dogs don't notice if you call them by another dog's name. 3. Dogs like it if you leave a lot of things on the floor. 4. A dog's parents never visit. 5. Dogs agree that you have to raise your...	sarg	1	723	05:11 PM Jun 18, 2013 by Chazza
	IT PAYS TO SPEAK UP...! (Preview) It's not new but I heard it again today and thought it worth repeating: A bloke goes into a Saloon Bar for a drink on the way home. It's very quiet and he chats with the barman. As they chat, he realises the most incredibly beautiful piano music is being played nearby. He asks the barman where the piano rec...	Chazza	0	579	05:19 AM Jun 18, 2013 by Chazza
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