Just Joking

gerard gue · gerard gue

What Confucius did not say!CONFUCIUS DID NOT SAY... Man who wants pretty nurse, must be patient. Passionate kiss, like spider web, leads to undoing of fly. Lady who goes camping must beware of evil intent. Squirrel who runs up woman's leg will not find nuts. Man who leaps off cliff jumps to conclusi...

tcp99 · tcp99

Rip and Rosie · Rip and Rosie

PLEASE NOTE: I did not write these, but I paste them here as a community service. We always hear "the rules" From the female side.. Now here are the rules from the male side. These are our rules! Please note.. these are all numbered "1 " ON PURPOSE! 1.Men are NOT mind readers. 1. Le...

Rip and Rosie · Rip and Rosie

We have a little Satnav It sits there in our car A Satnav is the driver's friend It tells you where you are. I have a little Satnav I've had it Most of my life It does more than the normal one My Satnav is my wife. It gives me full instructions On exactly how to drive "It's thirty miles an hour" it say...

Rip and Rosie · Rip and Rosie

I was testing children in my Sunday school class to see if they understood the concept of getting into heaven. I asked them, "If I sold my house and my car, had a big garage sale, and gave all my money to the church, would that get me into heaven?" "NO!" the children answered. "...

dazren · dazren

Julia Gillard walked into the NAB to cash a cheque. As she approached the cashier she said "Good morning , could you please cash this cheque for me"? Cashier: "It would be my pleasure Madam. Could you please show me your ID?" Gillard: "Well I didnt bring my ID with me as I didn...

Cowboy7307 · Cowboy7307

A dwarf waks in to a tall woman, He did not know if he'd had a crack in the mouth or a box around his ears

Hoodathunkit · Hoodathunkit

Russ and Sam, two friends, met in the park every day to feed the pigeons, watch the squirrels and discuss world problems. One day Russ didn't show up. Sam didn't think much about it and figured maybe he had a cold or something... But after Russ hadn't shown up for a week or so, Sam really got worried. Howev...

Kev-Maz · Kev-Maz

Two Dwarfs go into a bar, where they pick up two 'Working Girls' and take them to their separate hotel rooms for an hour of pleasure. The first Dwarf, however, is unable to get an erection. His depression is made worse by the fact that, from the next room, he hears his friend shouting out cries of ..."...

rockylizard · rockylizard

Nordic · Nordic

And then it is another year.... You know. . . time has a way of moving quickly and catching you unaware of the passing years. It seems just yesterday that I was young, and embarking on my new life. And yet in a way, it seems like eons ago, and I wonder where all the years went. But I know that I have lived them...

rockylizard · rockylizard

A man in Brisbane calls his son in Adelaide two days before Christmas and says, "I hate to ruin your day, but I have to tell you that your mother and I are divorcing; forty-five years of misery is enough." "Geez Dad, what are you talking about?" the son screams. "We can't stan...

Hoodathunkit · Hoodathunkit

A woman goes into Discount Fishing Supplies to buy a rod and reel for her grandson's birthday. She doesn't know which one to get, so she just picks one and goes over to the counter. The salesman is standing there, wearing dark shades. She says, "Excuse me. Can you tell me anything about this ro...

rockylizard · rockylizard

Hoodathunkit · Hoodathunkit

JENNY CRAIG ~ FOR MEN A guy calls the company and orders their 5 day - 5kg weight loss program. The next day, there's a knock on the door and standing before him a voluptuous, athletic, 19 year old babefrom J.C. Dressed in nothing but a pair of Nike running shoes and a sign around her neck.. The sign reads, '...

HOOK · HOOK

Irish Jokes. A bloke at a horse race whispers to Paddy, "Do you want the winner of the next race?" Paddy replies "No tanks, I've only got a small garden." Paddy and Mick found 3 hand grenades and decided to take them to the police station. Mick "What if one explodes before we g...

HOOK · HOOK

jules47 · jules47

Probably been seen by many - but here it is again - an oldie but a goodie There was movement at the station, so wrote a famous man But how did the Banjo know this? P'haps he towed a caravan. Perhaps Banjo had been woken, in a van park from his sleep Some two hours before the sunrise, by strange noises from...

jules47 · jules47

Nearly wet myself reading this one This is an actual review on amazon.co.UK for Veet Hair Removal for Men... A. Chappell This review is from: Veet for Men Hair Removal Gel Creme 200ml (Personal Care) After having been told my danglies looked like an elderly Rastafarian I decided to take the plunge and...

rockylizard · rockylizard

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	What Confucius did not say! (Preview) *What Confucius did not say!*CONFUCIUS DID NOT SAY... Man who wants pretty nurse, must be patient. Passionate kiss, like spider web, leads to undoing of fly. Lady who goes camping must beware of evil intent. Squirrel who runs up woman's leg will not find nuts. Man who leaps off cliff jumps to conclusi...	gerard gue	1	707	08:58 PM Sep 21, 2012 by kat555
	Happy Dogs (Preview)	tcp99	1	1470	08:55 PM Sep 21, 2012 by kat555
	The Man Rules (Preview) PLEASE NOTE: I did not write these, but I paste them here as a community service. We always hear "the rules" From the female side.. Now here are the rules from the male side. These are our rules! Please note.. these are all numbered "1 " ON PURPOSE! 1.Men are NOT mind readers. 1. Le...	Rip and Rosie	0	706	04:56 PM Sep 14, 2012 by Rip and Rosie
	My Satnav (Preview) We have a little Satnav It sits there in our car A Satnav is the driver's friend It tells you where you are. I have a little Satnav I've had it Most of my life It does more than the normal one My Satnav is my wife. It gives me full instructions On exactly how to drive "It's thirty miles an hour" it say...	Rip and Rosie	0	719	04:38 PM Sep 14, 2012 by Rip and Rosie
	Heaven (Preview) I was testing children in my Sunday school class to see if they understood the concept of getting into heaven. I asked them, "If I sold my house and my car, had a big garage sale, and gave all my money to the church, would that get me into heaven?" "NO!" the children answered. "...	Rip and Rosie	0	558	04:33 PM Sep 14, 2012 by Rip and Rosie
	Cashing a cheque ?/ (Preview) Julia Gillard walked into the NAB to cash a cheque. As she approached the cashier she said "Good morning , could you please cash this cheque for me"? Cashier: "It would be my pleasure Madam. Could you please show me your ID?" Gillard: "Well I didnt bring my ID with me as I didn...	dazren	1	865	02:49 PM Sep 14, 2012 by Kaid
	The short man (Preview) A dwarf waks in to a tall woman, He did not know if he'd had a crack in the mouth or a box around his ears	Cowboy7307	1	726	02:45 PM Sep 14, 2012 by Kaid
	Old Age at it's best (Preview) Russ and Sam, two friends, met in the park every day to feed the pigeons, watch the squirrels and discuss world problems. One day Russ didn't show up. Sam didn't think much about it and figured maybe he had a cold or something... But after Russ hadn't shown up for a week or so, Sam really got worried. Howev...	Hoodathunkit	0	719	03:18 PM Sep 13, 2012 by Hoodathunkit
	Two Dwarfs (Preview) Two Dwarfs go into a bar, where they pick up two 'Working Girls' and take them to their separate hotel rooms for an hour of pleasure. The first Dwarf, however, is unable to get an erection. His depression is made worse by the fact that, from the next room, he hears his friend shouting out cries of ..."...	Kev-Maz	1	809	03:50 PM Sep 12, 2012 by jules47
	Vehicle Safety Feature (Preview)	rockylizard	0	590	01:45 AM Sep 12, 2012 by rockylizard
	old age (Preview) And then it is another year.... You know. . . time has a way of moving quickly and catching you unaware of the passing years. It seems just yesterday that I was young, and embarking on my new life. And yet in a way, it seems like eons ago, and I wonder where all the years went. But I know that I have lived them...	Nordic	0	738	07:44 PM Sep 11, 2012 by Nordic
	Christmas (Preview) A man in Brisbane calls his son in Adelaide two days before Christmas and says, "I hate to ruin your day, but I have to tell you that your mother and I are divorcing; forty-five years of misery is enough." "Geez Dad, what are you talking about?" the son screams. "We can't stan...	rockylizard	3	736	01:33 AM Sep 12, 2012 by rockylizard
	A Beauty - for the Fishermen!!! (Preview) A woman goes into Discount Fishing Supplies to buy a rod and reel for her grandson's birthday. She doesn't know which one to get, so she just picks one and goes over to the counter. The salesman is standing there, wearing dark shades. She says, "Excuse me. Can you tell me anything about this ro...	Hoodathunkit	0	673	04:47 PM Sep 11, 2012 by Hoodathunkit
	Kiki Dee (Preview)	rockylizard	0	748	02:23 AM Sep 11, 2012 by rockylizard
	JENNY CRAIG ~ FOR MEN (Preview) JENNY CRAIG ~ FOR MEN A guy calls the company and orders their 5 day - 5kg weight loss program. The next day, there's a knock on the door and standing before him a voluptuous, athletic, 19 year old babefrom J.C. Dressed in nothing but a pair of Nike running shoes and a sign around her neck.. The sign reads, '...	Hoodathunkit	0	943	06:15 PM Sep 10, 2012 by Hoodathunkit
	Irish Jokes (Preview) Irish Jokes. A bloke at a horse race whispers to Paddy, "Do you want the winner of the next race?" Paddy replies "No tanks, I've only got a small garden." Paddy and Mick found 3 hand grenades and decided to take them to the police station. Mick "What if one explodes before we g...	HOOK	0	724	04:23 PM Sep 9, 2012 by HOOK
	Proof of Global Warming (Preview)	HOOK	2	615	04:25 PM Sep 9, 2012 by HOOK
	The caravanners lament!! (Preview) Probably been seen by many - but here it is again - an oldie but a goodie There was movement at the station, so wrote a famous man But how did the Banjo know this? P'haps he towed a caravan. Perhaps Banjo had been woken, in a van park from his sleep Some two hours before the sunrise, by strange noises from...	jules47	0	1639	10:16 PM Sep 8, 2012 by jules47
	VEET Hair Removal for Men (Preview) Nearly wet myself reading this one This is an actual review on amazon.co.UK for Veet Hair Removal for Men... A. Chappell This review is from: Veet for Men Hair Removal Gel Creme 200ml (Personal Care) After having been told my danglies looked like an elderly Rastafarian I decided to take the plunge and...	jules47	3	2058	10:17 PM Sep 8, 2012 by jules47
	Dear God (Preview)	rockylizard	0	780	02:24 AM Sep 8, 2012 by rockylizard
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