Just Joking

bill12 · bill12

Here,s something I saw in The Australian. The Canadian eco minister has a candle lit diner with wife to celebrate Earth day, and was rudely interupted when he caught the pet cat on fire........., then refused to use an electric fan to get rid of the smell(after dousing the cat ), caught the curtain...

miroku12g · miroku12g

Paddy say's "hey Mick" I'm thinking of getting a Labrador, Mick said, bugger that Paddy have you seen how many of their owners go blind !!!!! The grim reaper come for me last night ! I beat him of with a vacuum cleaner, talk about "Dyson" with death

Landfall · Landfall

Two mates walking their dogs on a nice sunny afternoon. After a while they come across a pub, one of the guys, says to his mate, "how about we go over and have a drink?" Is mate replies, "We can't go in the pub with the dogs." Watch, says his mate. He then pulls out his sunglasses and te...

jimbo · jimbo

During a recent flood in a small town, a young girl and a > boy were perched on top of their house. As they sat watching > articles float by in the water, they noticed an old hat go > past. > > Suddenly, the hat turned and came back, then turned around > and went downstream. After it had gon...

Cruising Granny · Cruising Granny

The Pastor's Ass The Pastor entered his donkey in a race and it won. The Pastor was so pleased with the donkey that he entered it in the race again and it won again. The local paper read: PASTOR'S ASS OUT FRONT. The Bishop was so upset with this kind of publicity that he ordered the Pastor not to enter the d...

gerard gue · gerard gue

A Scotsman walks into the Bank of England in Threadneedle Street, CentralLondon and asks for the manager.He tells the manager that he is going to Australia on business for two weeksand needs to borrow £5,000.The manager tells him that the bank will need some form of security for theloan,so Hamish ha...

Zoomtopz · Zoomtopz

A young woman want bigger breasts . But she does not want surgery . A friend tells her she has to go to Africa , and see Dr Bumbuktu . Off she goes , no problems says th Doc . Just recite this Every day , your boobs Will get bigger . "Scoobie , doobie , doobie , I want bigger boobies" . She does her exer...

Kev-Maz · Kev-Maz

-- Old Timers Bar Four old retired guys are walking down a street in Maroochydore. They turned a corner and see a sign that says, 'Old Timer's Bar - all drinks 10 cents! They look at each other, and then go in, thinking this is too good to be true. The old bartender says in a voice that carries across the room...

goinsoon · goinsoon

One day, a mum was cleaning her son's room and in the closet she found a bondage-S&M magazine. This was highly upsetting for her. She showed it to her husband. He looked at it and handed it back to her without a word. She finally asked him, "Well, what should we do about this?" The dad looke...

Firefly · Firefly

It takes your food seven seconds to get from your mouth to your stomach. One human hair can support 6.6 pounds. The average man's penis is two times the length of his thumb. Human thighbones are stronger than concrete. A woman's heart beats faster than a man's. There are about one trillion bacteria o...

rockylizard · rockylizard

Talk about getting older. I found my first grey pubic hair yesterday, normally these things don't worry me, but it was in my Big Mac.

justcruisin01 · justcruisin01

CHEWING GUM! An Australian man was having a coffee and croissants with butter and jam in a cafe when an American tourist, chewing gum, sat down next to him. The Australian politely ignored the American, who, nevertheless started up a conversation. The American snapped his gum and said, 'You Austr...

justcruisin01 · justcruisin01

A police officer pulls over a speeding car. The officer says, ' I clocked you at 120 km/h, sir.' The driver says, 'Christ, officer I had it on cruise control at 100, perhaps your radar gun needs calibrating.' Not looking up from her knitting the wife says: 'Now don't be silly dear, you know that this car...

Blue Orchid · Blue Orchid

If a man is alone in the dim dark jungle and talks to himself to ward off boredom... is he still wrong???

JRH · JRH

I don't need to have sex. I get screwed by the government every day.

justcruisin01 · justcruisin01

OLD people have problems that you haven't even considered yet! An 85-year-old man was told by the Doctor that he needed a sperm count as part of his physical exam. The doctor gave the man a jar and said, 'Take this jar home and bring back a semen sample tomorrow.' The next day the 85-year-old man reappea...

valnrob · valnrob

"Dogs Welcome" A man wrote a letter to a small hotel in a Midwest town he planned to visit on his vacation. He wrote: "I would very much like to bring my dog with me. He is well-groomed and very well behaved. Would you be willing to permit me to keep him in my room wi...

justcruisin01 · justcruisin01

Three sisters ages 92, 94 and 96 live in a house together. One night the 96 year old draws a bath.. She puts her foot in and pauses... She yells to the other sisters, "Was I getting in or out of the bath?" The 94 year old yells back, "I don't know. I'll come up and see." She starts up the s...

justcruisin01 · justcruisin01

NO SEX Since 1955 A crusty old Marine Sergeant Major found himself at a gala event hosted by a local liberal arts college. There was no shortage of extremely young idealistic ladies in attendance, one of whom approached the Sergeant Major for conversation. "Excuse me, Sergeant Major, but y...

justcruisin01 · justcruisin01

> > POOR MICK > > Paddy and Mick are two Irishmen working at the local sawmill. One day, > Mick slips and his arm gets caught and severed by the big bench saw. > Paddy quickly puts the limb in a plastic bag and rushes it and Mick to the > Local hospital. > Next day, Paddy goes to the ho...

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	Earth Day. (Preview) Here,s something I saw in The Australian. The Canadian eco minister has a candle lit diner with wife to celebrate Earth day, and was rudely interupted when he caught the pet cat on fire........., then refused to use an electric fan to get rid of the smell(after dousing the cat ), caught the curtain...	bill12	0	841	03:36 PM Mar 27, 2012 by bill12
	Guide Dogs (Preview) Paddy say's "hey Mick" I'm thinking of getting a Labrador, Mick said, bugger that Paddy have you seen how many of their owners go blind !!!!! The grim reaper come for me last night ! I beat him of with a vacuum cleaner, talk about "Dyson" with death	miroku12g	0	870	01:56 AM Mar 23, 2012 by miroku12g
	Blind faith. (Preview) Two mates walking their dogs on a nice sunny afternoon. After a while they come across a pub, one of the guys, says to his mate, "how about we go over and have a drink?" Is mate replies, "We can't go in the pub with the dogs." Watch, says his mate. He then pulls out his sunglasses and te...	Landfall	0	940	03:00 AM Mar 22, 2012 by Landfall
	My Dad! (Preview) During a recent flood in a small town, a young girl and a > boy were perched on top of their house. As they sat watching > articles float by in the water, they noticed an old hat go > past. > > Suddenly, the hat turned and came back, then turned around > and went downstream. After it had gon...	jimbo	0	1031	05:41 PM Mar 18, 2012 by jimbo
	The "Bottom" Line (Preview) The Pastor's Ass The Pastor entered his donkey in a race and it won. The Pastor was so pleased with the donkey that he entered it in the race again and it won again. The local paper read: PASTOR'S ASS OUT FRONT. The Bishop was so upset with this kind of publicity that he ordered the Pastor not to enter the d...	Cruising Granny	0	1032	03:44 AM Mar 17, 2012 by Cruising Granny
	Bank Loan to a Scottish millionaire (Preview) A Scotsman walks into the Bank of England in Threadneedle Street, CentralLondon and asks for the manager.He tells the manager that he is going to Australia on business for two weeksand needs to borrow £5,000.The manager tells him that the bank will need some form of security for theloan,so Hamish ha...	gerard gue	1	1042	08:47 PM Mar 16, 2012 by jimbo
	Dr Bumbuktu (Preview) A young woman want bigger breasts . But she does not want surgery . A friend tells her she has to go to Africa , and see Dr Bumbuktu . Off she goes , no problems says th Doc . Just recite this Every day , your boobs Will get bigger . "Scoobie , doobie , doobie , I want bigger boobies" . She does her exer...	Zoomtopz	1	979	08:45 PM Mar 16, 2012 by jimbo
	Old Timers Bar (Preview) -- Old Timers Bar Four old retired guys are walking down a street in Maroochydore. They turned a corner and see a sign that says, 'Old Timer's Bar - all drinks 10 cents! They look at each other, and then go in, thinking this is too good to be true. The old bartender says in a voice that carries across the room...	Kev-Maz	0	895	03:30 AM Mar 14, 2012 by Kev-Maz
	S&M (Preview) One day, a mum was cleaning her son's room and in the closet she found a bondage-S&M magazine. This was highly upsetting for her. She showed it to her husband. He looked at it and handed it back to her without a word. She finally asked him, "Well, what should we do about this?" The dad looke...	goinsoon	0	924	04:32 AM Mar 12, 2012 by goinsoon
	The Human Body (Preview) It takes your food seven seconds to get from your mouth to your stomach. One human hair can support 6.6 pounds. The average man's penis is two times the length of his thumb. Human thighbones are stronger than concrete. A woman's heart beats faster than a man's. There are about one trillion bacteria o...	Firefly	4	1014	05:11 AM Mar 11, 2012 by rowdy
	Getting Older.... (Preview) Talk about getting older. I found my first grey pubic hair yesterday, normally these things don't worry me, but it was in my Big Mac.	rockylizard	2	1078	06:22 PM Mar 10, 2012 by rockylizard
	CHEWING GUM; (Preview) CHEWING GUM! An Australian man was having a coffee and croissants with butter and jam in a cafe when an American tourist, chewing gum, sat down next to him. The Australian politely ignored the American, who, nevertheless started up a conversation. The American snapped his gum and said, 'You Austr...	justcruisin01	0	895	04:15 AM Mar 10, 2012 by justcruisin01
	BEING NICKED; (Preview) A police officer pulls over a speeding car. The officer says, ' I clocked you at 120 km/h, sir.' The driver says, 'Christ, officer I had it on cruise control at 100, perhaps your radar gun needs calibrating.' Not looking up from her knitting the wife says: 'Now don't be silly dear, you know that this car...	justcruisin01	0	813	04:14 AM Mar 10, 2012 by justcruisin01
	I wonder (Preview) If a man is alone in the dim dark jungle and talks to himself to ward off boredom... is he still wrong???	Blue Orchid	3	1083	06:25 PM Mar 9, 2012 by rosco
	Screwed (Preview) I don't need to have sex. I get screwed by the government every day.	JRH	0	999	11:23 PM Mar 7, 2012 by JRH
	HEALTH CHECK; (Preview) OLD people have problems that you haven't even considered yet! An 85-year-old man was told by the Doctor that he needed a sperm count as part of his physical exam. The doctor gave the man a jar and said, 'Take this jar home and bring back a semen sample tomorrow.' The next day the 85-year-old man reappea...	justcruisin01	1	1040	01:28 AM Mar 8, 2012 by Pam
	Dogs allowed here. (Preview) "Dogs Welcome" A man wrote a letter to a small hotel in a Midwest town he planned to visit on his vacation. He wrote: "I would very much like to bring my dog with me. He is well-groomed and very well behaved. Would you be willing to permit me to keep him in my room wi...	valnrob	1	959	10:55 PM Mar 6, 2012 by goinsoon
	THREE SISTERS; (Preview) Three sisters ages 92, 94 and 96 live in a house together. One night the 96 year old draws a bath.. She puts her foot in and pauses... She yells to the other sisters, "Was I getting in or out of the bath?" The 94 year old yells back, "I don't know. I'll come up and see." She starts up the s...	justcruisin01	0	847	03:18 AM Mar 6, 2012 by justcruisin01
	1955;; (Preview) NO SEX Since 1955 A crusty old Marine Sergeant Major found himself at a gala event hosted by a local liberal arts college. There was no shortage of extremely young idealistic ladies in attendance, one of whom approached the Sergeant Major for conversation. "Excuse me, Sergeant Major, but y...	justcruisin01	0	895	03:16 AM Mar 6, 2012 by justcruisin01
	POOR MICK; (Preview) > > POOR MICK > > Paddy and Mick are two Irishmen working at the local sawmill. One day, > Mick slips and his arm gets caught and severed by the big bench saw. > Paddy quickly puts the limb in a plastic bag and rushes it and Mick to the > Local hospital. > Next day, Paddy goes to the ho...	justcruisin01	0	929	10:08 PM Mar 3, 2012 by justcruisin01
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