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Wonders of wine
(Preview)
Image the scene. An elderly couple sitting on the verandah. She is quaffing white wine. The wife says. If you were to leave me I would pine and die without the pleasure of your uplifting company The husband looks at her quizzically, and said Is that you or the wine talking? Neither she said. Im talking to...
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oldphartz
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4
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1061
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Attitude Adjustment
(Preview)
Jimmy received a parrot for his birthday. The parrot was fully grown, with a very bad attitude and worse vocabulary. Every other word was an expletive; those that weren't expletives were, to say the least, rude. Jimmy tried to change the bird's attitude by constantly saying polite words, playing so...
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Travel Bug
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0
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795
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Dog for sale
(Preview)
DOG FOR SALE: A guy is driving around the back woods of Montana and he sees a sign in front of a broken down shanty-style house: 'Talking Dog For Sale 'He rings the bell and the owner appears and tells him the dog is in the backyard.The guy goes into the backyard and sees a nice looking Labrador retri...
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robell
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0
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729
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Confucious say.....
(Preview)
Confucious says "man who put cream in tart... not nessessarly baker" ....
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jules47
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5
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1117
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How Irish dancing started
(Preview)
http://videos2view.net/irish-dance.htm
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robell
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2
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900
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Latest Study
(Preview)
A 2007 study found that the average Australian walks about 900 miles a year. Another study found that the average Australian drinks 22 gallons of beer a year. That means the average Australian gets about 41 miles per gallon. Bloody good value that!
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jules47
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2
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828
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CRISIS!
(Preview)
If the global crisis continues at the present rate, by the end of this year only two banks will be left operational ..... the Blood Bank and the Sperm Bank! And before you know it, these two will merge, and the whole place will be full of bloody wankers.
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justcruisin01
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1
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902
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rabbits
(Preview)
A precious little girl walks into a PetSmart store and asks,in the sweetest little lisp, between two missing teeth,"Excuthe me, mithter, do you keep widdle wabbits?"As the shopkeeper's heart melts, he gets down on his knees so that he's on her level and asks,"Do you want a widdle...
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robell
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1
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927
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Dog Lover
(Preview)
A dog lover, whose dog was a female and "in heat', agreed to look after her neighbours male dog while the Neighbours were on vacation. She had a large house and believed that she could keep the two dogs apart. However, as she was drifting off to sleep she heard awful howling and moaning sounds, rush...
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jimbo
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0
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693
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One More
(Preview)
· "I've had a perfectly wonderful evening. But this wasn't it." - Groucho Marx
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jimbo
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2
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905
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Italian job
(Preview)
An 18 year old Italian girl tells her Mom that she has missed her period for 2 months. Very worried, the mother goes to the drugstore and buys a pregnancy kit. The test result shows that the girl is pregnant. Shouting, cursing, crying, the mother says, 'Who was the pig that did this to you? I want to know!'...
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jules47
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1
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901
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Insults
(Preview)
A member of Parliament to Disraeli: "Sir, you will either die on the gallows or of some unspeakable disease" "That depends, Sir," said Disraeli, "whether I embrace your policies or your mistress."
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jimbo
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0
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523
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gubby animation
(Preview)
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_wombat_
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0
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698
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Retirement fund
(Preview)
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jules47
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1
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1052
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Careful Son
(Preview)
An older gentleman was on the operating table awaiting surgery and he insisted that his son, a renowned surgeon, perform the operation. As he was about to get the anaesthesia, he asked to speak to his son. "Yes, Dad, what is it?" "Don't be nervous, son; do your best, and just remember,...
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jimbo
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2
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922
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Sperm bank
(Preview)
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jules47
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1
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1139
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Thoughtfull husband
(Preview)
Was on my facebook page. xxxxxxxxxxxx A man buys his son an iPAD, his daughter an iPOD, himself an iPHONE & his wife an iRON. For some reason, she wasn't impressed, even after he explained that it could be integrated with the iWASH, iCOOK & iCLEAN network. This triggered the iNAG service, wh...
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robell
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2
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803
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Senior citizen
(Preview)
A distraught senior citizen phoned her doctor's office. "Is it true," she wanted to know, "that the medication you prescribed has to be taken for the rest of my life?" "'Yes, I'm afraid so,"' the doctor told her. There was a moment of silence before the senior lady re...
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jimbo
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1
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836
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The age of stars
(Preview)
Tonight I went to the night session at the Cosmic Centre here in Charleville. One of the guides was saying that a particular group of stars had been together for 12 million years; and one woman said "how do they know how long they have been together?" and her husband said "because the...
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Esmeralda
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1
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839
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Women Just Don't seem to understand what matters
(Preview)
Her Diary: Tonight, I thought my husband was acting weird. We had made plans to meet at a nice restaurant for dinner. I was shopping with my friends all day long, so I thought he was upset at the fact that I was a bit late, but he made no comment on it. Conversation wasn't flowing, so I suggested that we go som...
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sucastja
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7
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1114
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