Just Joking

justcruisin01 · justcruisin01

> A middle-aged couple had two beautiful daughters but always talked > about having a son. > > They decided to try one last time for the son they always wanted. > > The wife got pregnant and delivered a healthy baby boy. > > The joyful father rushed to the nursery to see his new so...

justcruisin01 · justcruisin01

CAKE OR BED A HUSBAND IS AT HOME WATCHING A FOOTBALL GAME WHEN HIS WIFE INTERRUPTS, HONEY, COULD YOU FIX THE LIGHT IN THE HALLWAY? IT'S BEEN FLICKERING FOR WEEKS NOW. HE LOOKS AT HER AND SAYS ANGRILY, FIX THE LIGHTS NOW? DOES IT LOOK LIKE I HAVE ENERGY AUSTRALIAWRITTEN ON MY FOREHEAD? I DON'T THINK SO. FI...

barina · barina

An old man and woman were married for many years, even though they didn't like each other. Whenever there was a confrontation, yelling could be heard deep into the night. The old man would shout, "When I die, I will dig my way up and out of the grave and come back and haunt you for the rest of you...

justcruisin01 · justcruisin01

HILLBILLY DIVORCE A hillbilly farmer who wanted to get a divorce paid a visit to a lawyer.The lawyer said, 'How can I help you?'The farmer said, 'I want to get one of them dayvorces'. The lawyer said, 'Do you have any grounds?'The farmer said, 'Yes, I got 40 acres.'The lawyer said, 'No, No, you don't un...

Peterpan · Peterpan

Breasts without nipples would be pointless.

justcruisin01 · justcruisin01

A Man walks into a High Street bank & asks for a loan. He tells the bank officer he is going to Australia on business for two weeks and needs to borrow £5,000 The bank officer tells him that the bank will need some form of security for the loan, so the Liverpool lad hands over the keys and documents of...

justcruisin01 · justcruisin01

It was coming to the end of the day and sitting in his tiny near deserted local pub in Mt. Isa was an Aboriginal called Cactus. He was having a few beers as usual when a short well dressed and obviously gay man walked in and sat beside him. After three or four beers, the gay man leaned over towards Cactus and w...

jimbo · jimbo

A nice, calm and respectable lady went into the pharmacy, walked up to the pharmacist, looked straight into his eyes, and said, "Id like to buy some cyanide." The pharmacist asked, "Why in the world do you need cyanide?" The lady replied, "I need it to poison my husband.&q...

jimbo · jimbo

After being married forthirty years, a wife asked her husband to describe her. He looked at her for a while ... then said, "You're A, B, C, D, E, F, G,H, I, J, K." She asks ... "What does that mean?" He said, "Adorable, Beautiful, Cute, Delightful, Elegant, Foxy, Gorgeous,...

justcruisin01 · justcruisin01

The Old Cowboy The old cowboy sat down at the Starbucks and ordered a cup of coffee.As he sat sipping his coffee, a pretty young woman sat down next to him.. She turned to the cowboy and asked, 'Are you a real cowboy?' He replied, 'Well, I've spent my whole life breaking colts, working cattle, going t...

Zoomtopz · Zoomtopz

Had to get some new 'grundies' th other day. Got home opened th 5pack up to put in 'grundies' draw . One of them was a 'Meatloaf' pair Yeah .... honetly On the front it read I will do anything for love on th back But I won't do that. Richo

justcruisin01 · justcruisin01

On their way to get married, a young Roman Catholic couple was involved in a fatal car accident. The couple found themselves sitting outside the Pearly Gates waiting for St. Peter to process them into Heaven. While anxiously waiting they began to wonder; could they possibly get married in Heaven? W...

justcruisin01 · justcruisin01

Yossel Zelkovitz worked in a Polish pickle factory. For many years he had a powerful desire to put his penis in the pickle slicer. Unable to stand it any longer, he sought professional help from the factory psychologist.. After six months, the therapist gave up. He advised Yossel to go ahead and do it...

justcruisin01 · justcruisin01

An old drover named Billy was overseeing his herd in a remote stock route in the outback when suddenly a brand-new BMW 4WD advanced toward him out of a cloud of dust. The driver, a young man in a Brioni suit, Gucci shoes, RayBan sunglasses and YSL tie, leaned out the window and asked the old man, "If I...

Cupie · Cupie

Old Timers Bar Four old retired guys are walking down a street in Maroochydore. They turned a corner and see a sign that says, 'Old Timer's Bar - all drinks 10 cents! They look at each other, and then go in, thinking this is too good to be true. The old bartender says in a voice that carries across the room, '...

Cruising Granny · Cruising Granny

For all my fellow travellers: MY SATNAV I have a little Satnav It sits there in my car A Satnav is a driver's friend It tells you where you are I have a little Satnav I've had it all my life It does more than the normal one My Satnav is my wife It gives me full instructions On exactly how to drive "It's th...

Peterpan · Peterpan

Women like silent men, they think they are listening.

hammer · hammer

Guy goes into a bar, there's a robot bartender. The robot says, "What will you have?" The guy says, "Schooner of New" The robot brings back the best beer ever and says to the man, "What's your IQ?" The guy says," 168." The...

hammer · hammer

A big mining company recently hired several cannibals. 'You are all part of our team now', said the HR manager during the welcoming briefing. 'You get all the usual benefits and you can go to the cafeteria for something to eat, but please don't eat any of the other employees'. The cannibals promised th...

bill12 · bill12

Grey nomad is in a bar and sees a nice lady about the same age. "would you like a glass " he says. "yes" she says. "I need one toput my teeth in!" Loa. Bill

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	NOT THIS TIME; (Preview) > A middle-aged couple had two beautiful daughters but always talked > about having a son. > > They decided to try one last time for the son they always wanted. > > The wife got pregnant and delivered a healthy baby boy. > > The joyful father rushed to the nursery to see his new so...	justcruisin01	0	1044	03:59 AM Jun 1, 2012 by justcruisin01
	FEMALE LOGIC; (Preview) CAKE OR BED A HUSBAND IS AT HOME WATCHING A FOOTBALL GAME WHEN HIS WIFE INTERRUPTS, HONEY, COULD YOU FIX THE LIGHT IN THE HALLWAY? IT'S BEEN FLICKERING FOR WEEKS NOW. HE LOOKS AT HER AND SAYS ANGRILY, FIX THE LIGHTS NOW? DOES IT LOOK LIKE I HAVE ENERGY AUSTRALIAWRITTEN ON MY FOREHEAD? I DON'T THINK SO. FI...	justcruisin01	0	961	08:57 PM May 31, 2012 by justcruisin01
	Directions (Preview) An old man and woman were married for many years, even though they didn't like each other. Whenever there was a confrontation, yelling could be heard deep into the night. The old man would shout, "When I die, I will dig my way up and out of the grave and come back and haunt you for the rest of you...	barina	1	1031	03:54 AM Jun 1, 2012 by justcruisin01
	THE FARMER WANTS A ? (Preview) HILLBILLY DIVORCE A hillbilly farmer who wanted to get a divorce paid a visit to a lawyer.The lawyer said, 'How can I help you?'The farmer said, 'I want to get one of them dayvorces'. The lawyer said, 'Do you have any grounds?'The farmer said, 'Yes, I got 40 acres.'The lawyer said, 'No, No, you don't un...	justcruisin01	0	921	04:37 AM May 30, 2012 by justcruisin01
	A Thought (Preview) Breasts without nipples would be pointless.	Peterpan	0	804	07:08 PM May 29, 2012 by Peterpan
	HIGH FINANCE; (Preview) A Man walks into a High Street bank & asks for a loan. He tells the bank officer he is going to Australia on business for two weeks and needs to borrow £5,000 The bank officer tells him that the bank will need some form of security for the loan, so the Liverpool lad hands over the keys and documents of...	justcruisin01	0	1000	02:54 AM May 29, 2012 by justcruisin01
	CACTUS; (Preview) It was coming to the end of the day and sitting in his tiny near deserted local pub in Mt. Isa was an Aboriginal called Cactus. He was having a few beers as usual when a short well dressed and obviously gay man walked in and sat beside him. After three or four beers, the gay man leaned over towards Cactus and w...	justcruisin01	0	956	02:50 AM May 29, 2012 by justcruisin01
	Married Life (Preview) A nice, calm and respectable lady went into the pharmacy, walked up to the pharmacist, looked straight into his eyes, and said, "Id like to buy some cyanide." The pharmacist asked, "Why in the world do you need cyanide?" The lady replied, "I need it to poison my husband.&q...	jimbo	0	791	08:48 PM May 28, 2012 by jimbo
	The ABC (Preview) After being married forthirty years, a wife asked her husband to describe her. He looked at her for a while ... then said, "You're A, B, C, D, E, F, G,H, I, J, K." She asks ... "What does that mean?" He said, "Adorable, Beautiful, Cute, Delightful, Elegant, Foxy, Gorgeous,...	jimbo	0	770	08:35 PM May 28, 2012 by jimbo
	THE OLD COWBOY; (Preview) The Old Cowboy The old cowboy sat down at the Starbucks and ordered a cup of coffee.As he sat sipping his coffee, a pretty young woman sat down next to him.. She turned to the cowboy and asked, 'Are you a real cowboy?' He replied, 'Well, I've spent my whole life breaking colts, working cattle, going t...	justcruisin01	0	903	07:51 PM May 28, 2012 by justcruisin01
	Grundies (Preview) Had to get some new 'grundies' th other day. Got home opened th 5pack up to put in 'grundies' draw . One of them was a 'Meatloaf' pair Yeah .... honetly On the front it read I will do anything for love on th back But I won't do that. Richo	Zoomtopz	0	810	01:42 PM May 27, 2012 by Zoomtopz
	GETTING MARRIED; (Preview) On their way to get married, a young Roman Catholic couple was involved in a fatal car accident. The couple found themselves sitting outside the Pearly Gates waiting for St. Peter to process them into Heaven. While anxiously waiting they began to wonder; could they possibly get married in Heaven? W...	justcruisin01	0	930	02:31 AM May 26, 2012 by justcruisin01
	PICKLE SLICER; (Preview) Yossel Zelkovitz worked in a Polish pickle factory. For many years he had a powerful desire to put his penis in the pickle slicer. Unable to stand it any longer, he sought professional help from the factory psychologist.. After six months, the therapist gave up. He advised Yossel to go ahead and do it...	justcruisin01	0	899	02:30 AM May 26, 2012 by justcruisin01
	SO TRUE; (Preview) An old drover named Billy was overseeing his herd in a remote stock route in the outback when suddenly a brand-new BMW 4WD advanced toward him out of a cloud of dust. The driver, a young man in a Brioni suit, Gucci shoes, RayBan sunglasses and YSL tie, leaned out the window and asked the old man, "If I...	justcruisin01	1	1123	04:56 AM May 26, 2012 by Travel Bug
	Grey Nomads (Preview) Old Timers Bar Four old retired guys are walking down a street in Maroochydore. They turned a corner and see a sign that says, 'Old Timer's Bar - all drinks 10 cents! They look at each other, and then go in, thinking this is too good to be true. The old bartender says in a voice that carries across the room, '...	Cupie	2	1229	06:40 AM May 25, 2012 by Cruising Granny
	MY SATNAV (Preview) For all my fellow travellers: MY SATNAV I have a little Satnav It sits there in my car A Satnav is a driver's friend It tells you where you are I have a little Satnav I've had it all my life It does more than the normal one My Satnav is my wife It gives me full instructions On exactly how to drive "It's th...	Cruising Granny	0	903	11:26 PM May 23, 2012 by Cruising Granny
	I am being brave. (Preview) Women like silent men, they think they are listening.	Peterpan	2	1037	11:58 PM May 23, 2012 by bill12
	Best Bar Joke ever (Preview) Guy goes into a bar, there's a robot bartender. The robot says, "What will you have?" The guy says, "Schooner of New" The robot brings back the best beer ever and says to the man, "What's your IQ?" The guy says," 168." The...	hammer	4	1546	11:34 PM May 23, 2012 by Comebak-Wilson
	The Admin Chick (Preview) A big mining company recently hired several cannibals. 'You are all part of our team now', said the HR manager during the welcoming briefing. 'You get all the usual benefits and you can go to the cafeteria for something to eat, but please don't eat any of the other employees'. The cannibals promised th...	hammer	1	1014	11:29 PM May 23, 2012 by Cruising Granny
	grey nomad pick up line. (Preview) Grey nomad is in a bar and sees a nice lady about the same age. "would you like a glass " he says. "yes" she says. "I need one toput my teeth in!" Loa. Bill	bill12	1	1150	05:26 AM May 22, 2012 by Travel Bug
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