Just Joking

robell · robell

I was in the six item express lane at the store quietly fuming. Completely ignoring the sign, the woman ahead of me had slipped into the check-out line pushing a cart piled high with groceries. Imagine my delight when the cashier beckoned the woman to come forward looked into the cart and asked sweetl...

Firefly · Firefly

Paddy is passing by Mick's hay shed one day when through a gap in the door he sees Mick doing a slow and sensual striptease in front of an old red Massey Fergusontractor. Buttocks clenched he performs a slow pirouette and gently slides off first the right welly, followed by the left. He then hunches hi...

clazandaza · clazandaza

Two boys in Brisbane playing football in the park when one of the boys is attacked by a savage Rottweiler. Thinking quickly, the other boy rips a board off the nearby fence, wedges it down the dog's collar, and twists, breaking the dog's neck. A Courier Mail reporter hears about the incident and...

robell · robell

One for the ladies One day my housework-challenged husband decided to wash his Sweat-shirt Seconds after he stepped into the laundry room, he shouted to me, "What setting do I use on the washing machine?" "It depends," I replied. "What does it say on your shirt?" He...

robell · robell

Airline Lunches I put my carry-on in the luggage Compartment and sat down in my Assigned seat. It was going to be a long flight from Perth.'I'm glad I have a good book to read Perhaps I will get a short sleep,' I thought. Just before take-off, a line of diggers Came down the aisle and filled a...

robell · robell

Defense Attorney: Will you please state your age? Little Old Lady: I am 94 years old. Defense Attorney: Will you tell us, in your own words, what happened the night of April 1st? Little Old Lady: There I was, sitting there in my swing on my front porch on a warm spring evening, when a young man comes creep...

robell · robell

BOB HOPE IN HEAVEN For those of you too young to remember Bob Hope, ask your Grandparents. And thanks for the memories. WHAT A WONDERFUL E-MAIL. I HOPE THIS WILL PUT A SMILE ON YOUR FACE AND IN YOUR HEART. Tribute to a man who DID make a difference. ON TURNING 70 'You still chase women...

Firefly · Firefly

A young couple moves into a new neighborhood. The next morning while they are eating breakfast, The young woman sees her neighbor hanging the wash outside. "That laundry is not very clean", she said. "She doesn't know how to wash correctly. Perhaps she needs better laundr...

Happywanderer · Happywanderer

Three Ladies in a Sauna THREE WOMEN, TWO YOUNGER, AND ONE SENIOR CITIZEN, WERE SITTING NAKED IN A SAUNA. SUDDENLY THERE WAS A BEEPING SOUND. THE YOUNG WOMAN PRESSED HER FOREARM AND THE BEEP STOPPED. THE OTHERS LOOKED AT HER QUESTIONINGLY. 'THAT WAS MY PAGER,' SHE SAID. I HAVE A MICROCHIP UNDER THE SKIN...

Firefly · Firefly

4 Worms in church Four worms and a lesson to be learned!!!! A minister decided that a visual demonstration would add emphasis to his Sunday sermon. Four worms were placed into four separate jars. The first worm was put into a container of alcohol. The second worm was put into a container of cigar...

robell · robell

Subject: A Little Flab...................... One morning while making breakfast, a man walked up to his wife, pinched her on the butt and said, "if you firmed up, we could get rid of your control top panty hose". While this was on the edge of intolerable, she kept silent. The next morning...

BGR · BGR

A guy calls the muso's union to get a quote on a 6 piece band for a wedding. The rep says "Off the top of my head...... about $2,000". The guys says "WHAT! FOR MUSIC?." The rep responds "I'll tell you what, why don't you call the plumbers union & ask for six plumbers to work f...

Zoomtopz · Zoomtopz

Enjoy life Now , it has an expiration date . Jn other words Aspire to Inspire before You Expire Richo

jules47 · jules47

A psychiatrist was conducting a group therapy session with four young Mothers and their small childr en . You all have obsessions,' he observed.. To the first mother, Mary, he said, 'You are obsessed with eating. You've ev en named your daughter Candy.' He turned to the second Mom, Ann: 'Your ob...

jules47 · jules47

Men are like.... 1. Men are likeLaxatives. They irritate the crap out of you. 2 Men are likeBananas . The older they get, the less firm they are. 3.Men are like Weather . Nothing can be done to change them. 4.Men are like BlendersYou need one, but you're not quite sure why. 5. Men are likeChocolate Bars .....

jules47 · jules47

Sorry reposted same one by mistake -- Edited by jules47 on Friday 15th of April 2011 04:51:37 PM

robell · robell

Global Facts About SexAt Any Given Moment:FACT: 79,000,000 people are engaged in sex - right now! FACT: 58,000,000 are kissing. FACT: 37,000,000 are relaxing after having sex. FACT: 1 elderly person is reading e-mails You hang in there, Sunshine ............... ...

Firefly · Firefly

Yesterday my wife asked why I didn't do something useful with my time. She suggested I go down to the senior center and hang out with the guys. I did this and when I got home last night I told her that I had joined a parachute club. She said "Are you nuts? You're 70 years old and you're going to start j...

bill12 · bill12

A fisherman wins lotto, and is down the local pub, shouting the bar. A mate says"Bill, what are you going to do with all your money?" Bill scratches his head , and then his bum , and says "I,ve thought about it-I think I,ll keep fishing til its all gone..............."

petengail · petengail

A woman asks her husband at breakfast time, "Would you like some bacon and eggs, a slice of toast, and maybe some grapefruit juice and coffee?" He declines. "Thanks for asking, but I'm not hungry right now. It's this Viagra," he says. "It's really taken the edge off m...

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	Laugh (Preview) I was in the six item express lane at the store quietly fuming. Completely ignoring the sign, the woman ahead of me had slipped into the check-out line pushing a cart piled high with groceries. Imagine my delight when the cashier beckoned the woman to come forward looked into the cart and asked sweetl...	robell	0	971	10:09 PM Apr 21, 2011 by robell
	Paddy (Preview) Paddy is passing by Mick's hay shed one day when through a gap in the door he sees Mick doing a slow and sensual striptease in front of an old red Massey Fergusontractor. Buttocks clenched he performs a slow pirouette and gently slides off first the right welly, followed by the left. He then hunches hi...	Firefly	1	927	09:11 PM Apr 21, 2011 by robell
	Queenslander (Preview) Two boys in Brisbane playing football in the park when one of the boys is attacked by a savage Rottweiler. Thinking quickly, the other boy rips a board off the nearby fence, wedges it down the dog's collar, and twists, breaking the dog's neck. A Courier Mail reporter hears about the incident and...	clazandaza	0	957	07:02 PM Apr 20, 2011 by clazandaza
	one for the ladies (Preview) One for the ladies One day my housework-challenged husband decided to wash his Sweat-shirt Seconds after he stepped into the laundry room, he shouted to me, "What setting do I use on the washing machine?" "It depends," I replied. "What does it say on your shirt?" He...	robell	0	848	12:40 PM Apr 19, 2011 by robell
	They deserve it (Preview) Airline Lunches I put my carry-on in the luggage Compartment and sat down in my Assigned seat. It was going to be a long flight from Perth.'I'm glad I have a good book to read Perhaps I will get a short sleep,' I thought. Just before take-off, a line of diggers Came down the aisle and filled a...	robell	2	1426	01:55 PM Apr 18, 2011 by Pam
	Don't upset granny (Preview) Defense Attorney: Will you please state your age? Little Old Lady: I am 94 years old. Defense Attorney: Will you tell us, in your own words, what happened the night of April 1st? Little Old Lady: There I was, sitting there in my swing on my front porch on a warm spring evening, when a young man comes creep...	robell	0	977	06:34 PM Apr 17, 2011 by robell
	memories (Preview) BOB HOPE IN HEAVEN For those of you too young to remember Bob Hope, ask your Grandparents. And thanks for the memories. WHAT A WONDERFUL E-MAIL. I HOPE THIS WILL PUT A SMILE ON YOUR FACE AND IN YOUR HEART. Tribute to a man who DID make a difference. ON TURNING 70 'You still chase women...	robell	1	856	05:51 PM Apr 17, 2011 by robell
	Washing (Preview) A young couple moves into a new neighborhood. The next morning while they are eating breakfast, The young woman sees her neighbor hanging the wash outside. "That laundry is not very clean", she said. "She doesn't know how to wash correctly. Perhaps she needs better laundr...	Firefly	1	809	05:02 PM Apr 17, 2011 by Travel Bug
	Three ladies in a sauna! (Preview) Three Ladies in a Sauna THREE WOMEN, TWO YOUNGER, AND ONE SENIOR CITIZEN, WERE SITTING NAKED IN A SAUNA. SUDDENLY THERE WAS A BEEPING SOUND. THE YOUNG WOMAN PRESSED HER FOREARM AND THE BEEP STOPPED. THE OTHERS LOOKED AT HER QUESTIONINGLY. 'THAT WAS MY PAGER,' SHE SAID. I HAVE A MICROCHIP UNDER THE SKIN...	Happywanderer	1	1029	04:56 PM Apr 17, 2011 by Travel Bug
	Four Worms (Preview) 4 Worms in church Four worms and a lesson to be learned!!!! A minister decided that a visual demonstration would add emphasis to his Sunday sermon. Four worms were placed into four separate jars. The first worm was put into a container of alcohol. The second worm was put into a container of cigar...	Firefly	1	952	02:18 PM Apr 17, 2011 by Travel Bug
	a little flab (Preview) Subject: A Little Flab...................... One morning while making breakfast, a man walked up to his wife, pinched her on the butt and said, "if you firmed up, we could get rid of your control top panty hose". While this was on the edge of intolerable, she kept silent. The next morning...	robell	1	970	02:16 PM Apr 17, 2011 by Travel Bug
	So you need a band (Preview) A guy calls the muso's union to get a quote on a 6 piece band for a wedding. The rep says "Off the top of my head...... about $2,000". The guys says "WHAT! FOR MUSIC?." The rep responds "I'll tell you what, why don't you call the plumbers union & ask for six plumbers to work f...	BGR	1	706	02:14 PM Apr 17, 2011 by Travel Bug
	Life's Moments (Preview) Enjoy life Now , it has an expiration date . Jn other words Aspire to Inspire before You Expire Richo	Zoomtopz	1	1019	02:13 PM Apr 17, 2011 by Travel Bug
	Obsessions (Preview) A psychiatrist was conducting a group therapy session with four young Mothers and their small childr en . You all have obsessions,' he observed.. To the first mother, Mary, he said, 'You are obsessed with eating. You've ev en named your daughter Candy.' He turned to the second Mom, Ann: 'Your ob...	jules47	1	984	02:09 PM Apr 17, 2011 by Travel Bug
	Men (Preview) Men are like.... 1. Men are likeLaxatives. They irritate the crap out of you. 2 Men are likeBananas . The older they get, the less firm they are. 3.Men are like Weather . Nothing can be done to change them. 4.Men are like BlendersYou need one, but you're not quite sure why. 5. Men are likeChocolate Bars .....	jules47	0	907	09:21 AM Apr 17, 2011 by jules47
	Obsessions (Preview) Sorry reposted same one by mistake -- Edited by jules47 on Friday 15th of April 2011 04:51:37 PM	jules47	0	826	04:50 PM Apr 15, 2011 by jules47
	global facts (Preview) Global Facts About SexAt Any Given Moment:FACT: 79,000,000 people are engaged in sex - right now! FACT: 58,000,000 are kissing. FACT: 37,000,000 are relaxing after having sex. FACT: 1 elderly person is reading e-mails *You hang in there, Sunshine ...............* ...	robell	0	655	07:09 PM Apr 13, 2011 by robell
	My Parachute Club (Preview) Yesterday my wife asked why I didn't do something useful with my time. She suggested I go down to the senior center and hang out with the guys. I did this and when I got home last night I told her that I had joined a parachute club. She said "Are you nuts? You're 70 years old and you're going to start j...	Firefly	0	827	04:56 PM Apr 11, 2011 by Firefly
	fisherman win lotto! (Preview) A fisherman wins lotto, and is down the local pub, shouting the bar. A mate says"Bill, what are you going to do with all your money?" Bill scratches his head , and then his bum , and says "I,ve thought about it-I think I,ll keep fishing til its all gone..............."	bill12	0	748	04:46 PM Apr 10, 2011 by bill12
	Viagra - Appetite suppresant (Preview) A woman asks her husband at breakfast time, "Would you like some bacon and eggs, a slice of toast, and maybe some grapefruit juice and coffee?" He declines. "Thanks for asking, but I'm not hungry right now. It's this Viagra," he says. "It's really taken the edge off m...	petengail	1	1362	08:47 AM Apr 9, 2011 by Beth54
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