Just Joking

Firefly · Firefly

-- Edited by Firefly on Monday 2nd of November 2009 03:44:34 PM

Firefly · Firefly

Wombat 280 · Wombat 280

A rabbit walks into a pub and says to the barman, 'Can I have a pint of beer, and a Ham and Cheese Toastie?' The barman is amazed, but gives the rabbit a pint of beer and a ham and cheese toastie. The rabbit drinks the beer and eats the toastie. He then leaves. The following night the rabbit returns and again a...

twobob · twobob

A nun walks into Mother Superior's office and plunks down into a chair. She lets out a sigh heavy with frustration. 'What troubles you, Sister?' asked the Mother Superior. 'I thought this was the day you spent with your family.' 'It was,' sighed the Sister. 'And I went to play golf with my brother. We tr...

jimricho · jimricho

If you receive an email titled Nude Photo of Pauline Hanson DO NOT OPEN IT as it may contain a virus! If you receive an email titled Nude Photo of Julia Gillard DO NOT OPEN IT as may contain a nude photo of Julia Gillard!

Gary and Kerry · Gary and Kerry

One day my housework-challenged husband decided to wash his Sweat-shirt.. Seconds after he stepped into the laundry room, he shouted to me, 'What setting do I use on the washing machine?' 'It depends,' I replied. 'What does it say on your shirt?' He yelled back, ' OHIO STATE ! ' And they say blon...

Firefly · Firefly

At a national conference of the Australian Hotels Association, the general managers of Cascade Brewery ( Tasmania ), Tooheys ( New South Wales ), XXXX ( Queensland ), CUB ( Victoria ) and Coopers ( South Australia ) found themselves sitting at the same table for lunch. When the waitress asked what the...

twobob · twobob

when will it end!!! I just had a call from a Charity asking me to donate some of my clothes to the starving people throughout the world. I told them to P*ss off!! Anybody who fits into my clothes isn't starving!!

jimricho · jimricho

WARNING; DON'T "DE-SPOONERISE" IF NAUGHTY WORDS OFFEND! In Memory Of A Great Man, The Late Ronnie Barker This was originally shown on BBC TV back in the seventies. Ronnie Barker could say all this without a sn igger (though god knows how many takes). Irony is that they received not one comp...

Wombat 280 · Wombat 280

Two Crocodiles were sitting at the side of LakeBurley Griffin in Canberra. The smaller one turned to the bigger one and said, 'I can't understand howyou can be so much bigger than me. We're the same age, we were the same sizeas kids. I just don't get it.' 'Well,' said the big Croc, 'what have you been ea...

Wombat 280 · Wombat 280

A young jackaroo from outback Queensland goes off to university, but halfway through the semester he foolishly has squandered all of his money. He calls home. 'Dad,' he says, 'you won't believe what modern education is developing. They actually have a program here in Brisbane That will teac...

Firefly · Firefly

Tired of constantly being broke & stuck in an unhappy Marriage, a young husband decided to solve both problems By taking out a large insurance policy on his wife with himself as the Beneficiary, and then arranging to have her killed. A 'friend of a friend' put him in touch with a nefarious dark-si...

Firefly · Firefly

Bob Hill and his new wife Betty were vacationing in Europe.... as it happens, near Transylvania . They were driving in a rental car along a rather deserted highway. It was late and raining very hard. Bob could barely see the road in front of the car. Suddenly the car skids out of control! Bob attempts...

jimricho · jimricho

The NSW Government and the NSW Greens party were recently presenting an alternative method to NSW Farmers for controlling that States rampant dingo population. It seems that after years of the farmers using the tried and true traditional methods of shooting or trapping the predators, the tree-h...

Firefly · Firefly

A Mallee farmer got into his ute, drove to a neighbouring farm and knocked at the farmhouse door. A young boy about 9 opened the door. "Is your Dad home?" the farmer asked. "No sir, he isn't," the boy replied. "He went into town." "Well," said the farmer, &q...

jimricho · jimricho

MOUSE BALLS... I don't know how they wrote this with a straight face. This was a real memo sent out by a computer company (IBM) to its employees in all seriousness. It went to all field engineers regarding a computer peripheral problem. The author of this memo was quite genuine. The engineers rolled...

Firefly · Firefly

Little Susie goes home from school and tells her mum that the boys keep asking her to do cartwheels because she's very good at them. Mum said, "You should say no, they only want to look at your panties". Susie said, "I know they do, that's why I hide them in my bag".

suenami · suenami

Two nuns, Sister Catherine and Sister Helen, are traveling through Europe in their car. They get to Transylvania and are stopped at a traffic light. Suddenly, out of nowhere, a tiny little Dracula jumps onto the hood of the car and hisses through the windshield. "Quick, quick!" shouts Si...

Firefly · Firefly

A young man shopping in a supermarket noticed a little old lady following him around. If he stopped, she stopped. Furthermore she kept staring at him. She finally overtook him at the checkout, And she turned to him and said, "I hope I haven't made you feel ill at ease; it's just that you look so muc...

Gary and Kerry · Gary and Kerry

A little boy and his grandfather are raking leaves in the yard. The little boy sees an earthworm trying to get back into its hole. He says, "Grandpa, I bet I can put that worm back in that hole." The grandfather replies, "I'll bet you five dollars you can't. It's too wiggly and limp to put...

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	Grizzly Bears (Preview) -- Edited by Firefly on Monday 2nd of November 2009 03:44:34 PM	Firefly	0	663	04:42 PM Nov 2, 2009 by Firefly
	The Womens Remote (Preview)	Firefly	0	813	12:45 PM Nov 2, 2009 by Firefly
	Bugs Bunny (Preview) A rabbit walks into a pub and says to the barman, 'Can I have a pint of beer, and a Ham and Cheese Toastie?' The barman is amazed, but gives the rabbit a pint of beer and a ham and cheese toastie. The rabbit drinks the beer and eats the toastie. He then leaves. The following night the rabbit returns and again a...	Wombat 280	1	1140	06:05 PM Nov 1, 2009 by jimricho
	God of Golf (Preview) A nun walks into Mother Superior's office and plunks down into a chair. She lets out a sigh heavy with frustration. 'What troubles you, Sister?' asked the Mother Superior. 'I thought this was the day you spent with your family.' 'It was,' sighed the Sister. 'And I went to play golf with my brother. We tr...	twobob	0	668	08:45 PM Oct 30, 2009 by twobob
	Important!!...Virus Warning...Nude photos (Preview) If you receive an email titled Nude Photo of Pauline Hanson DO NOT OPEN IT as it may contain a virus! If you receive an email titled Nude Photo of Julia Gillard DO NOT OPEN IT as may contain a nude photo of Julia Gillard!	jimricho	0	1107	08:20 PM Oct 30, 2009 by jimricho
	Its a man thing (Preview) One day my housework-challenged husband decided to wash his Sweat-shirt.. Seconds after he stepped into the laundry room, he shouted to me, 'What setting do I use on the washing machine?' 'It depends,' I replied. 'What does it say on your shirt?' He yelled back, ' OHIO STATE ! ' And they say blon...	Gary and Kerry	1	868	02:38 PM Oct 30, 2009 by JRH
	A Queensland Joke. (Preview) At a national conference of the Australian Hotels Association, the general managers of Cascade Brewery ( Tasmania ), Tooheys ( New South Wales ), XXXX ( Queensland ), CUB ( Victoria ) and Coopers ( South Australia ) found themselves sitting at the same table for lunch. When the waitress asked what the...	Firefly	2	1332	01:49 PM Oct 30, 2009 by biggles
	Charity (Preview) when will it end!!! I just had a call from a Charity asking me to donate some of my clothes to the starving people throughout the world. I told them to P*ss off!! Anybody who fits into my clothes isn't starving!!	twobob	2	941	09:51 PM Oct 29, 2009 by robert and esther
	Rindercella and her sugly isters (Preview) WARNING; DON'T "DE-SPOONERISE" IF NAUGHTY WORDS OFFEND! In Memory Of A Great Man, The Late Ronnie Barker This was originally shown on BBC TV back in the seventies. Ronnie Barker could say all this without a sn igger (though god knows how many takes). Irony is that they received not one comp...	jimricho	9	3914	04:31 PM Oct 27, 2009 by dave06
	Losing Weight (Preview) Two Crocodiles were sitting at the side of LakeBurley Griffin in Canberra. The smaller one turned to the bigger one and said, 'I can't understand howyou can be so much bigger than me. We're the same age, we were the same sizeas kids. I just don't get it.' 'Well,' said the big Croc, 'what have you been ea...	Wombat 280	0	969	11:43 AM Oct 26, 2009 by Wombat 280
	University of Life (Preview) A young jackaroo from outback Queensland goes off to university, but halfway through the semester he foolishly has squandered all of his money. He calls home. 'Dad,' he says, 'you won't believe what modern education is developing. They actually have a program here in Brisbane That will teac...	Wombat 280	0	870	11:15 AM Oct 26, 2009 by Wombat 280
	Murder At Woolworths (Preview) Tired of constantly being broke & stuck in an unhappy Marriage, a young husband decided to solve both problems By taking out a large insurance policy on his wife with himself as the Beneficiary, and then arranging to have her killed. A 'friend of a friend' put him in touch with a nefarious dark-si...	Firefly	2	737	11:51 PM Oct 23, 2009 by ElBe
	Travellers (Preview) Bob Hill and his new wife Betty were vacationing in Europe.... as it happens, near Transylvania . They were driving in a rental car along a rather deserted highway. It was late and raining very hard. Bob could barely see the road in front of the car. Suddenly the car skids out of control! Bob attempts...	Firefly	2	1048	11:45 PM Oct 23, 2009 by ElBe
	Greenies n dingoes (Preview) The NSW Government and the NSW Greens party were recently presenting an alternative method to NSW Farmers for controlling that States rampant dingo population. It seems that after years of the farmers using the tried and true traditional methods of shooting or trapping the predators, the tree-h...	jimricho	1	1039	07:03 PM Oct 23, 2009 by Disco Duck
	The Mallee Farmer (Preview) A Mallee farmer got into his ute, drove to a neighbouring farm and knocked at the farmhouse door. A young boy about 9 opened the door. "Is your Dad home?" the farmer asked. "No sir, he isn't," the boy replied. "He went into town." "Well," said the farmer, &q...	Firefly	1	879	07:01 PM Oct 23, 2009 by Disco Duck
	MOUSE BALLS... (Preview) MOUSE BALLS... I don't know how they wrote this with a straight face. This was a real memo sent out by a computer company (IBM) to its employees in all seriousness. It went to all field engineers regarding a computer peripheral problem. The author of this memo was quite genuine. The engineers rolled...	jimricho	3	950	07:00 PM Oct 23, 2009 by Disco Duck
	Little Susie (Preview) Little Susie goes home from school and tells her mum that the boys keep asking her to do cartwheels because she's very good at them. Mum said, "You should say no, they only want to look at your panties". Susie said, "I know they do, that's why I hide them in my bag".	Firefly	0	702	02:52 PM Oct 21, 2009 by Firefly
	Two Nuns (Preview) Two nuns, Sister Catherine and Sister Helen, are traveling through Europe in their car. They get to Transylvania and are stopped at a traffic light. Suddenly, out of nowhere, a tiny little Dracula jumps onto the hood of the car and hisses through the windshield. "Quick, quick!" shouts Si...	suenami	0	803	07:46 PM Oct 19, 2009 by suenami
	Mum (Preview) A young man shopping in a supermarket noticed a little old lady following him around. If he stopped, she stopped. Furthermore she kept staring at him. She finally overtook him at the checkout, And she turned to him and said, "I hope I haven't made you feel ill at ease; it's just that you look so muc...	Firefly	0	879	05:47 PM Oct 16, 2009 by Firefly
	Smart Kid (Preview) A little boy and his grandfather are raking leaves in the yard. The little boy sees an earthworm trying to get back into its hole. He says, "Grandpa, I bet I can put that worm back in that hole." The grandfather replies, "I'll bet you five dollars you can't. It's too wiggly and limp to put...	Gary and Kerry	1	801	11:59 AM Oct 16, 2009 by Pam
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