Just Joking

Solomon · Solomon

A restaurant has a sign that says "$500" if we fail to fill your order." A customer decides to test it by ordering "elephant ears on rye bread". The waitress takes his order to the kitchen. Seconds later, the chef storms out, goes to the customer's table and slams down $500...

grandaddon · grandaddon

Solomon · Solomon

Ginger · Ginger

I was not sure where to put this so decided to put it here. I know you have all seen sidewalk art. I thought this one was rather neat. Julian Beever is an English artist whos famous for his art on the pavement of England, France, Germany, USA, Australia and Belgium. Most of his artwork it is impossible to t...

Onedodger · Onedodger

Hangover Ratings 1 star hangover No pain. no real feeling of illness. You slept in your own bed and when you woke up there were no traffic cones in there with you. You are still able to function relatively well on the energy stored up from all those vodka and Red Bulls. However, you can drink 10 bottl...

Solomon · Solomon

A crowded United Airlines flight was canceled. A single agent was re-booking a long line of inconvenienced travelers. Suddenly an angry passenger pushed his way to the counter. He slapped his ticket down on the counter and said, "I HAVE to be on this flight and it has to be FIRST CLASS." T...

Zoomtopz · Zoomtopz

The Pope was going to have a shower one day . Allthough his ideas were very strict on celibacy , there was also a need to occasionally exercise the papal wrist , this happened to be one of those occasions . Just as the holy seeds were flying through the air , the pope noticed a photographer taking pics . Hold...

Ginger · Ginger

TWENTY-THREE THINGS Yes I know it has been around a while but sometimes these things need to be re- read TWENTY-THREE THINGS YOU SHOULD HAVE LEARNED BY NOW 1. If you're too open-minded, your brains will fall out. 2. Don't worry about what people think, they don't do it very often. 3. Going to church does...

Solomon · Solomon

A 2007 study found that the average Australian walks about 900 miles a year. Another study found that the average Australian drinks 22 gallons of beer a year. That means the average Australian gets about 41 miles per gallon. That's bloody good value!

justcruisin01 · justcruisin01

A man was riding his Harley beside a Sydney beach when suddenly the sky clouded above his head and in a booming voice, The Lord said. 'Because you have TRIED to be faithful to me in all ways, I will grant you one wish.' The biker pulled over and said, 'Build a bridge to New Zealand so I can ride over anytime I w...

Palebushman · Palebushman

Click on this link below and see if it reminds you of any local enterprise. http://www.brownfools.co.uk/

clazandaza · clazandaza

A dentist noticed that his next patient, a little old lady, was nervous, so he decided to tell her a little joke as he put on his gloves. 'Do you know how they make these gloves?' he asked. 'No, I don't,' she replied. 'Well,' he spoofed, 'there's a building in Canada with a big tank of latex, and workers of a...

Hylda&Jon · Hylda&Jon

On a Lighter Note ! Why Australia is in Trouble The population of this country is 20 million. 11 million are retired. That leaves 9 million to do the work. There are 5 million in school Which leaves 4 million to do the work. Of this there are 2 million employed by the federal government. Leaving 2 million t...

justcruisin01 · justcruisin01

Subject: Greenie revenge --- Love it! The chief woman 'Greenie Tree-Hugging Activist', who was responsible for getting horses banned from National parks and State forests, was Climbing a tree to have a look out over the forest when a Tawny Frogmouth Owl attacked her for invading its nesting site....

Cruising Granny · Cruising Granny

A guy calls his buddy, the horse rancher, and says he's sending a friend over to look at a horse. His buddy asks, 'How will I recognize him?' 'That's easy, he's a dwarf with a speech impediment.' So, the dwarf shows up, and the guy asks him if he's looking for a male or female horse. 'A female hort...

justcruisin01 · justcruisin01

'To My Dear Wife:You will surely understand that I have certain needs that you, being 54 years old, can no longer satisfy. I am very happy with you and I value you as a good wife.Therefore, after reading this letter, I hope that you will not wrongly interpret the fact that I will be spending the evening wi...

Xtrail51 · Xtrail51

> Subject: Irish joke>>>> Two Irish friends leave the pub. One says to other, 'I can't be bothered>> to walk all the way home.'>>>> 'I know, me too but we've no money for a cab and we've missed the last>> bus home.'>>>> 'We could steal a bus from...

Palebushman · Palebushman

After having dug to a depth of 10 feet last year, Melbourne scientists found traces of copper wire dating back 100 years and came to the conclusion that their ancestors already had a telephone network more than 100 years ago. Not to be outdone by the Victorians, in the weeks that followed, a Sydney arch...

Cinnamon · Cinnamon

A young man asks his father, "Dad, how many kinds of breasts are there?" The father, surprised, answers: "Well, son, there are three kinds of breasts. In her twenties, a woman's breasts are like melons, round and firm. In her thirties to forties, they are like pears, still nice but ha...

jimricho · jimricho

Two Aussies, Davo and Johnno, were adrift in a lifeboat. While rummaging through the boat's provisions, Davo stumbled across an old lamp. He rubbed the lamp vigorously and a genie came forth. This genie, however, stated that he could only deliver one wish, not the standard three. Without giving muc...

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	You got me ! (Preview) A restaurant has a sign that says "$500" if we fail to fill your order." A customer decides to test it by ordering "elephant ears on rye bread". The waitress takes his order to the kitchen. Seconds later, the chef storms out, goes to the customer's table and slams down $500...	Solomon	0	900	07:45 PM Mar 24, 2010 by Solomon
	Going to Church!! (Preview)	grandaddon	1	747	07:07 PM Mar 24, 2010 by JRH
	An oldie (Preview)	Solomon	0	685	08:06 AM Mar 22, 2010 by Solomon
	Coke bottle (Preview) I was not sure where to put this so decided to put it here. I know you have all seen sidewalk art. I thought this one was rather neat. Julian Beever is an English artist whos famous for his art on the pavement of England, France, Germany, USA, Australia and Belgium. Most of his artwork it is impossible to t...	Ginger	5	989	08:18 PM Mar 21, 2010 by Ginger
	Hangover Rating (Preview) Hangover Ratings 1 star hangover No pain. no real feeling of illness. You slept in your own bed and when you woke up there were no traffic cones in there with you. You are still able to function relatively well on the energy stored up from all those vodka and Red Bulls. However, you can drink 10 bottl...	Onedodger	0	852	05:39 PM Mar 21, 2010 by Onedodger
	The booking agent (Preview) A crowded United Airlines flight was canceled. A single agent was re-booking a long line of inconvenienced travelers. Suddenly an angry passenger pushed his way to the counter. He slapped his ticket down on the counter and said, "I HAVE to be on this flight and it has to be FIRST CLASS." T...	Solomon	0	787	10:02 AM Mar 18, 2010 by Solomon
	The Pope & That camera (Preview) The Pope was going to have a shower one day . Allthough his ideas were very strict on celibacy , there was also a need to occasionally exercise the papal wrist , this happened to be one of those occasions . Just as the holy seeds were flying through the air , the pope noticed a photographer taking pics . Hold...	Zoomtopz	0	866	06:55 AM Mar 18, 2010 by Zoomtopz
	23 things (Preview) TWENTY-THREE THINGS Yes I know it has been around a while but sometimes these things need to be re- read TWENTY-THREE THINGS YOU SHOULD HAVE LEARNED BY NOW 1. If you're too open-minded, your brains will fall out. 2. Don't worry about what people think, they don't do it very often. 3. Going to church does...	Ginger	1	970	11:12 AM Mar 17, 2010 by clazandaza
	Good value (Preview) A 2007 study found that the average Australian walks about 900 miles a year. Another study found that the average Australian drinks 22 gallons of beer a year. That means the average Australian gets about 41 miles per gallon. That's bloody good value!	Solomon	0	655	09:14 PM Mar 14, 2010 by Solomon
	GRANTED WISH; (Preview) A man was riding his Harley beside a Sydney beach when suddenly the sky clouded above his head and in a booming voice, The Lord said. 'Because you have TRIED to be faithful to me in all ways, I will grant you one wish.' The biker pulled over and said, 'Build a bridge to New Zealand so I can ride over anytime I w...	justcruisin01	1	771	09:20 PM Mar 12, 2010 by Pam
	This is a genuine website too! (Preview) Click on this link below and see if it reminds you of any local enterprise. http://www.brownfools.co.uk/	Palebushman	1	766	12:11 AM Mar 8, 2010 by Zoomtopz
	Rubber Gloves (Preview) A dentist noticed that his next patient, a little old lady, was nervous, so he decided to tell her a little joke as he put on his gloves. 'Do you know how they make these gloves?' he asked. 'No, I don't,' she replied. 'Well,' he spoofed, 'there's a building in Canada with a big tank of latex, and workers of a...	clazandaza	0	850	10:36 AM Mar 7, 2010 by clazandaza
	Working Population (Preview) On a Lighter Note ! Why Australia is in Trouble The population of this country is 20 million. 11 million are retired. That leaves 9 million to do the work. There are 5 million in school Which leaves 4 million to do the work. Of this there are 2 million employed by the federal government. Leaving 2 million t...	Hylda&Jon	0	889	11:04 PM Mar 5, 2010 by Hylda&Jon
	REVENGE; (Preview) Subject: Greenie revenge --- Love it! The chief woman 'Greenie Tree-Hugging Activist', who was responsible for getting horses banned from National parks and State forests, was Climbing a tree to have a look out over the forest when a Tawny Frogmouth Owl attacked her for invading its nesting site....	justcruisin01	1	883	09:48 PM Mar 5, 2010 by Pam
	Horth Withperer (Preview) A guy calls his buddy, the horse rancher, and says he's sending a friend over to look at a horse. His buddy asks, 'How will I recognize him?' 'That's easy, he's a dwarf with a speech impediment.' So, the dwarf shows up, and the guy asks him if he's looking for a male or female horse. 'A female hort...	Cruising Granny	1	755	07:50 PM Mar 5, 2010 by clazandaza
	IF ITS GOOD ENOUGH FOR THE GOOSE;;;;;; (Preview) 'To My Dear Wife:You will surely understand that I have certain needs that you, being 54 years old, can no longer satisfy. I am very happy with you and I value you as a good wife.Therefore, after reading this letter, I hope that you will not wrongly interpret the fact that I will be spending the evening wi...	justcruisin01	0	1161	05:08 PM Feb 28, 2010 by justcruisin01
	Irish Joke (Preview) > Subject: Irish joke>>>> Two Irish friends leave the pub. One says to other, 'I can't be bothered>> to walk all the way home.'>>>> 'I know, me too but we've no money for a cab and we've missed the last>> bus home.'>>>> 'We could steal a bus from...	Xtrail51	4	1650	07:51 PM Feb 25, 2010 by Zoomtopz
	Proud to be a Queenslander (Preview) After having dug to a depth of 10 feet last year, Melbourne scientists found traces of copper wire dating back 100 years and came to the conclusion that their ancestors already had a telephone network more than 100 years ago. Not to be outdone by the Victorians, in the weeks that followed, a Sydney arch...	Palebushman	0	874	05:02 PM Feb 24, 2010 by Palebushman
	Melons, pears and onions (Preview) A young man asks his father, "Dad, how many kinds of breasts are there?" The father, surprised, answers: "Well, son, there are three kinds of breasts. In her twenties, a woman's breasts are like melons, round and firm. In her thirties to forties, they are like pears, still nice but ha...	Cinnamon	1	1259	09:13 AM Feb 24, 2010 by Zoomtopz
	Two Assies (Preview) Two Aussies, Davo and Johnno, were adrift in a lifeboat. While rummaging through the boat's provisions, Davo stumbled across an old lamp. He rubbed the lamp vigorously and a genie came forth. This genie, however, stated that he could only deliver one wish, not the standard three. Without giving muc...	jimricho	0	830	08:40 PM Feb 20, 2010 by jimricho
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