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Gorilla tree
(Preview)
This guy wakes up one morning to find a gorilla in his tree. He looks in the phone book for a gorilla removal service until he finds one. "Is it a boy or girl Gorilla?" the service guy asks. "Boy," is the man's response. "Oh yeah, I can do it. I'll be right there." An hour la...
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jules47
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4
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1193
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Weather prediction
(Preview)
It was April and the Aboriginals in a remote part of Northern Australia asked their new elder if the coming winter was going to be cold or mild. Since he was an elder in a modern community he had never been taught the old secrets from his elders when he was a boy. When he looked at the sky he couldn't tell what...
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jules47
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0
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955
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First Seniors Moment Ever recorded
(Preview)
Hope you like this http://campervans.myfreeforum.org/sutra187.php#187
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Brookie
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0
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962
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Mrs Parks.
(Preview)
The 6th grade science teacher, Mrs. Parks, asked her class, 'Which human body part increases to ten times its size when stimulated?' No one answered until little Mary stood up and said, 'You should not be asking sixth graders a question like that! I'm going To tell my parents, and they will go and tell...
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Firefly
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0
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969
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INDIAN TAXI DRIVER
(Preview)
A stark naked,drunken Australian woman,jumped into a vacant taxi in down town New Delhi. The Indian driver was immediately beside himselfand just kept on staring at the woman.He made no attempt to start the cab. What's wrong with you mate,haven't you ever seen a naked white woman befo...
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Ma
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3
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1163
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KIDS;
(Preview)
Grandma may not know everything... Little Tony was 9 years old and was staying with his grandmother for a few days. He'd been playing outside with the other kids for a while when he came into the house and asked her: 'Grandma, what's that called when two people sleep in the same room and one is on top of the...
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justcruisin01
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0
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841
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CUCKOO;
(Preview)
The other night I was invited out for a night with "the girls." I told my husband that I would be home by midnight, "I promise!" Well, the hours passed and the margaritas went down way too easy. Around 3 am, a bit loaded, I headed for home. Just as I got in the door, the cuckoo clock in...
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justcruisin01
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0
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984
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Only an Aussie can make you feel like a woman.
(Preview)
A plane passed through a severe storm. The turbulence was awful, and things went from bad to worse when one wing was struck by lightening. One woman lost it completely. She stood up in the front of the plane and screamed, 'I'm too young to die,' she cried. Then she yelled, 'If I'm going to die, I want my las...
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jimricho
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0
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869
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ADVICE
(Preview)
Advice from a Sex Therapist > Paddy is passing by Mick's hay shed one day > when through a gap in the door > he sees Mick doing a slow and sensual striptease in front > of an old red > Massey Ferguson . > > > Buttocks clenched he performs a slow pirouette and gently > slides off f...
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justcruisin01
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0
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963
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Happy Trailer Trash
(Preview)
I'm happy to be "trailer trash" or Grey Nomads.
Caravan Park people did not cause any of the problems that our countries face today.
They did not get mortgages they couldn't afford.
They did not run the banks to the ground with greed.
They did not use investors for their personal be...
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Cruising Granny
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0
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1007
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Paddy
(Preview)
Paddy was waiting at the bus stop with his mate when a lorry went by loaded up with rolls of turf. Paddy said, 'I gonna do that when I win lottery' 'What's dat, says his mate. 'Send me lawn away to be cut'.
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Firefly
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0
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1014
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luck of the Irish
(Preview)
Fw: FW: Quickies ...FW: Quickies ...Thursday, 21 October 2010 9:23:12 PMFrom:"Stephen Maxfield" <scipcom@tpg.com.au>To:"Stephen Maxfield" <scipcom@tpg.com.au> Paddy goes to the vet with his goldfish. "I think it's got epilepsy" he tells t...
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jules47
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0
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808
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RYE BREAD
(Preview)
Rye Bread Two old guys, one 80 and one 87, were sitting on their usual spot in the park one morning. The 87 year old had just finished his morning jog and wasn't even short of breath. The 80 year old was amazed at his friend's stamina and asked him what he did to have so much energy. The 87 year old said, "...
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justcruisin01
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0
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853
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SLOW LEARNER;
(Preview)
Bob walked into a sports bar around 9:58 PM. > He sat down next to a blonde at the bar > And stared up at the TV. > > The 10 PM news was coming on. > The news crew was covering the story > Of a man on the ledge of a large building > Preparing to jump. > > > > The blonde looked at Bo...
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justcruisin01
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0
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1071
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DREAMER;
(Preview)
A fifteen year old Amish boy and his father were in a mall. They were amazed by almost everything they saw, but especially by two shiny, silver walls that could move apart and then slide back together again. The boy asked, 'What is this Father?' The father (never having seen an elevator) responded, 'So...
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justcruisin01
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0
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876
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money talks;
(Preview)
ONLY THE IRISH, BLESS 'EM! . Paddy was waiting at the bus stop with his mate when a lorry went by loaded up with rolls of turf. Paddy said, 'I gonna do that when I win lottery' 'What's dat, says his mate. 'Send me lawn away to be cut'.
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justcruisin01
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1
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1094
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MAMMOGRAMS
(Preview)
Mammograms Many women are afraid of their first mammogram, but there is no need to worry. By taking a few minutes each day for a week preceding the exam and doing the following exercises, you will be totally prepared for the test and best of all, you can do these simple exercises right in and around your h...
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Ma
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6
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1220
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LITTLE GIRL ON A PLANE
(Preview)
A congressman was seated next to a little girl on an airplane so he turned to her and said, "Do you want to talk? Flights go quicker if you strike up a conversation with your fellow passenger." The little girl, who had just started to read her book, replied to the total stranger, "What wo...
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justcruisin01
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1
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1052
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Irish burial at Sea;
(Preview)
Mick and Paddy had promised their Uncle Seamus, who had been a seafaring gent, all his life, to bury him at sea when he died. Well, in due time, Seamus did pass away and the boys kept their promise. They set off with Uncle Seamus all stitched up in a sea burial bag and loaded onto their rowboat. After a wee bi...
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justcruisin01
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0
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1166
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FATAL;
(Preview)
Don't try this at home as it may prove fatal !!!!! Gotta give it to this bloke!!! On their 50th anniversary, a wife found the negligee she wore on her wedding night and put it on. She went to her husband, a retired military man, and asked, 'Honey, do you remember this?' He looked up from his newspaper and sa...
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justcruisin01
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0
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995
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