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Martian sex
(Preview)
The year is 2222 and Mike and Maureen land on Mars after accumulating enough frequent flier miles. They meet a Martian couple and are talking about all sorts of things. Mike asks if Mars has a stock market, if they have laptop computers, how they make money, etc. Finally, Maureen brings up the subjec...
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anolphart
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The Drover at the Pearly Gates..
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A drover from a huge cattle station in the outback appeared before St. Peter at the Pearly Gates."Have you ever done anything of particular merit?" St. Peter asked."Well, I can think of one thing," the drover offered."Once, on a trip to the back blocks of Broken Hill out in New South Wales , I came acros...
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aussie_paul
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547
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Be strong!
(Preview)
An escaped convict, imprisoned for 1st degree murder, had spent 25 years of his life sentence in prison. While on the run, he broke into a house and tied up a young couple who had been sleeping in the bedroom. He tied the man to a chair on one side of the room and his wife on the bed. He got on the bed righ...
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anolphart
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618
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Who thinks up these things!!!!!!!!!!!!
(Preview)
FAMILY TREE OF VINCENT VAN GOGH (always pronounced as Van GO)His dizzy aunt ----------------------------------------------- Verti GoghThe brother who ate prunes------------------------------- Gotta GoghThe brother who worked at a convenience store ------ Stop N GoghThe grandfather fr...
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aussie_paul
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1
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656
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Who wore it best?
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Bobdown
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3
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699
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lol...
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aussie_paul
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0
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624
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40-40-40...
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aussie_paul
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458
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The officer...
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aussie_paul
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The officer...
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aussie_paul
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471
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A new priest...
(Preview)
A new priest at his first mass was so nervous he could hardly speak.After the mass, he asked the Monsignor how he had done. The Monsignor replied, When I am worried about getting nervous on the pulpit, I put a glass of vodka next to the water glass. If I start to get nervous, I take a sip.Next Sunday the new p...
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aussie_paul
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393
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Comments
(Preview)
12 of the finest (unintentional) double-entendres ever aired on TV and radio.1.Ted Walsh- Horse Racing Commentator 'This is really a lovely horse. I once rode her mother.'2.New Zealand Rugby Commentator 'Andrew Mehrtens loves it when Daryl Gibson comes inside of him.'3.Pat Glenn, weightlifti...
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rgren2
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Who said...
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aussie_paul
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693
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Good deed done for the day..
(Preview)
I was just in Coles at the checkout, and an old bloke in front was getting served.His bill came to $54.60, but when he counted out his change, he had just under $50.He didn't want me to help him, God bless him, but I insisted, and in no time we had all his shopping back on the shelves.
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aussie_paul
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Stolen from another site -
(Preview)
Johnny's pregnant sister was in a terrible car accident and went into a deep coma.After being in the coma for nearly six months, she wakes up and sees that she is no longer pregnant.Frantically, she asks the Doctor about her baby.The doctor replies, " Madam, you had twins....a boy and a girl. The babie...
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aussie_paul
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709
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Don't want any kids
(Preview)
My wife and I decided last night that we dont want any kids.We will tell them later today!
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anolphart
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444
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A plan..
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aussie_paul
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2
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523
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A plan.. OOPS have already posted it. :(
(Preview)
-- Edited by aussie_paul on Friday 2nd of June 2023 03:29:29 PM
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aussie_paul
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610
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Should I Really Join Facebook? (Priceless)
(Preview)
Read it all the way through! It's a good laugh! AND really quite true!!A good laugh for people in the over 70 group !!!When I bought my Blackberry, I thought about the 30-year business I ran with 1800 employees, all without a cell phone that plays music,takes videos, pictures and communicates with Fac...
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aussie_paul
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In Court.....
(Preview)
"So let me get this straight" the prosecutor says to the defendant. "You came home from work early and found your wife in bed with a strange man". "That's correct" says the defendant. "Upon which" continues the prosecutor "you take out a pistol and shot your wife, killing her". "That's correct" says t...
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aussie_paul
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649
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Pet Python
(Preview)
This blonde was selling her pet python on eBay. A bloke rang up and asked if it was big. She said "It's massive". He said "How many feet?" She said "None. It's a snake you idiot!"
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aussie_paul
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