John let me forward my deepest sympathy to you and yours, it is of course, especially bad at this time of year as everybody else is celebrating and you have your own private inner pain, it must also be remembered that his suffering is over, but it doesnt ease the burden for those of us left behind

well of course easy said but not so easy to achieve, in ireland the ritual is total celebration of a loved ones passing and I tend to lean towards that, I.E. a large "wake" to celebrate the achievements of his/her life rather than all sitting aroud howling ones eyes out because we are sad that he/she has gone

we tried this at our mothers passing and it worked up to a point but I dont care who you are it is always a sad time for all concerned,

maybe some middle ground is the main focal point where we are sad at the passing but also glad that we had the chance to know the person at the same time

we watch these people grow alongside us, their life evolving right with ours, all their trials and tribulations, their success and failures and then for some unknown reason they are taken from us and all of a sudden they are just "not there" any more

I think the answer is just enjoy who we have while we have them and at every oppurtunity tell them and show them how we feel about them and just simply revel in a close relationship, it does come back around and enriches ones own life, when they pass then at least they know they were loved whilst here for a short time and we in turn are loved, that I think is the secret, but anyway john have a beer in his memory and have a beer for me, life, in all it's glory, continues

Hello John.Dave has already said amost caring a thoughtful tribute to the loss of your Brother in law.My wife and I second Daves message to you.Our Kindest Regards.Sylvia and Martin.

Yes John, we would also like to extend our sincere condolences. I'm sure everyone in this forum will endorse Dave's words from the heart in wishing you encouragement and support.


Sue & Brian