The bishop sat in lordly state and purple cap sublime, And galvanised the old bush church at confirmation time; And all the kids were mustered up from fifty miles around, With Sunday clothes and staring eyes and ignorance profound. Now was it fate, or was it grace, whereby they yarded too An overgrown two-story lad from Tangmalangaloo?
A hefty son of virgin soil, where nature has her fling, And grows the trefoil three feet high and mats it in the spring; Where mighty oaks uplift their heads to pierce the welkin's rim, And trees sprout up a hundred yards before they shoot a limb; There everything is big and grand, and men are giants too - But Christian Knowledge wilts, alas, at Tangmalangaloo.
The bishop summed the youngsters up, as bishops only can; He cast a searching eye around, then fixed upon his man. But glum and dumb and undismayed through every bout he sat; He seemed to think that he was there, but wasn't sure of that. The bishop gave a scornful look, as bishops sometimes do, And glared right through the pagan in from Tangmalangaloo.
"Come, tell me, boy," his lordship said in crushing tones severe, "Come, tell me why is Christmas Day the greatest in the year? How is it that around the world we celebrate that day And send a name upon a card to those who're far away? Why is it wandering ones return with smiles and greetings, too?" A squall of knowledge hit the lad from Tangmalangaloo.
He gave a lurch which set a-shake the vases on the shelf, He knocked the benches all askew, up-ending of himself. And oh, how pleased his lordship was, and how he smiled to say, "That's good, my boy. Come, tell me now; and what is Christmas day?" The ready answer bared a fact no bishop ever knew - "It's the day before the races out at Tangmalangaloo."
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Daisy and Disco Duck
Adelaide South Australia
Gotta Think Outside the Square!
Now that food has replaced sex in my life, I can't even get into my own pants.
If at First You Don't Succeed.......Redefine Success !!
It sounds rather absurd , I've just received word There's problems down at the infirmary, All the patients now curse a young first year nurse, Whose mistake was so elementary.
Because matron decreed, all the dentures did need To be collected and given a scrub. Without any debate the nurse gathered each plate, Placed them in a big galvanised tub.
She was in quite a rush with soap and big brush, Till those molars shone like they were new, Oh what a nark not one did she mark, Then it dawned she was in quite a stew.
As those dentures did soak those teeth saw the joke. They all smiled with a terrible grin, Would a solution evolve and her problem solve, To find the owners for the teeth in that tin.
Well it upset the staff to see those dentures laugh, While the owners they just couldnt find, Using tenacity and wit they just wouldnt fit They were all in one terrible bind.
Until in due course they resorted to force, With the patients mouths held open wide, They did push and did shove with no sign of love, Till each mouth had teeth firmly inside.
Now you should be discreet should ever you meet, A person with a very fixed grin, You can bet your whole purse that a very young nurse, mixed their dentures up in that tin.
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Daisy and Disco Duck
Adelaide South Australia
Gotta Think Outside the Square!
Now that food has replaced sex in my life, I can't even get into my own pants.
If at First You Don't Succeed.......Redefine Success !!
It isn't easy Ibbo................I can tell you that!!
First you have to find one and then read it and finally copy it to the forum. Damned harrrrd work. I am so glad thta you appreciate it.
I think we should form a "Mutual Appreciation Society" and only let anyone in who appreciates us......................(I think it is going to be a very small society.)
I love some of that bush poetry stuff!! I never could string ten words together without five swear words. :) There are some very gifted people around.
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Daisy and Disco Duck
Adelaide South Australia
Gotta Think Outside the Square!
Now that food has replaced sex in my life, I can't even get into my own pants.
If at First You Don't Succeed.......Redefine Success !!
Yes, Guitar Patterson,Cyril Lawson,Kevin Ruddish,all legends.My favourite is "The Mongrel"he has penned some beauties all humorous.I think he has one called the seqel to "The Man From Snowy River"paints a picture of the suffering and final demise of his horse and it's injuries sustained whilst running down tree lined mountains looking for some Geriatrics Colt.If anyone knows the Mongels name would you pass it on please.Cheers.Ibbo.
I TO LOVE THE TRUE BUSH POETRY. I have had the pleasure of listening to a MR DON KNEEBONE from Bobinawarrah [north east vic] reciting while attending the Mountain Cattlemens Cup, A true aussie bushman.
Don Lloyd, Ibbo........... Is that the fella you are talking about?
Don Lloyd is a local character from the Northern Rivers of NSW and he's been spinning his yarns to avid followers for more years than he cares to remember. His larger than life character is a regular at functions, where his inimitable style sets the audience rolling in the aisles. His four recordings are always in demand, and are only just now available online. His witty tales and poems have even been delighting the city folk, where his albums are regularly represented on Sydney's 2SM on Grant Goldman's radio programs.
-- Edited by Disco Duck on Tuesday 3rd of November 2009 12:02:48 PM
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Daisy and Disco Duck
Adelaide South Australia
Gotta Think Outside the Square!
Now that food has replaced sex in my life, I can't even get into my own pants.
If at First You Don't Succeed.......Redefine Success !!