Men are like linoleum floors. Lay 'em right and you can walk all over them for thirty years
~ Jean Kerr...
The only reason they say " Women and children first" is to test the strength of the lifeboats
~Emo Philips...
A computer once beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kickboxing.
~ Spike Milligan...
The best cure for sea sickness, is to sit under a tree.
~ Jean Rostand...
Kill one man and you're a murderer, kill a million and you're a conqueror.
~ Arnold Schwarzenegger...
Having more money doesn't make you happier. I have 50 million dollars, but I was just as happy when I had 48 million.
~ Warren Tantum... (School photo album).
I don't believe in astrology. I am a Sagittarius and we're very sceptical.
~ Steve Martin...
Hollywood must be the only place on earth where you can be fired by a man wearing a Hawaiian shirt and a baseball cap.
~ Doug Hanwell...
America is so advanced that even the chairs are electric.
~ George Roberts...
The first piece of luggage on the carousel never belongs to anyone.
~ Robert Benchley...
I have kleptomania and when it gets bad, I take something for it.
~ John Glenn...
As I hurtled through space, one thought kept crossing my mind : every part of this rocket was supplied by the lowest bidder.
~ David Letterman...
America is the only country where a significant proportion of the population believes that professional wrestling is real but the moon landing was faked.
~ Howard Hughes...
I'm not a paranoid, deranged millionaire. Dammit, I'm a billionaire.
