Just Joking

aussie_paul · aussie_paul

A SMALL GLIMMER OF HOPE IN THE GLOOM !'Viagra' is now available in tea bags.It doesn't enhance your sexual performancebut it does stop your biscuit going soft. Ha ha.

aussie_paul · aussie_paul

"Blessed are those that can give without remembering, and take without forgetting.One day a florist went to a barber for a haircut. After the cut, he asked about his bill, and the barber replied, 'I cannot accept money from you, I'm doing community service this week.'The florist was pleased and left...

aussie_paul · aussie_paul

This old lady had lived at the head of the bight at the bottom of Australia for many years, her only companion was Thomas her cat. Each day they would climb down the path in the cliffs to the beach & walk up and back, beach combing for anything washed up over night. This was a daily event as sometimes log...

67HR · 67HR

Aussie1 · Aussie1

Some of the biggest mistaken identities are among so called intellectuals who have trouble remembering that they are not God.

Aussie1 · Aussie1

How do you milk sheep? Bring out a new "I Phone" and charge $1000+ for it.

aussie_paul · aussie_paul

Funny BUT unfortunately probably close to the truth!! Read to the very end !!!The Squirrel and The GrasshopperPOPULAR VERSIONThe squirrel works hard in the withering heat all summer long, building and improving his house and laying up supplies for the winter.The grasshopper thinks he's a fool, a...

Aussie1 · Aussie1

There is plenty of room for all God's Creatures, right next to the Mashed Potatoes...

rgren2 · rgren2

rgren2 · rgren2

aussie_paul · aussie_paul

aussie_paul · aussie_paul

"Please Do Not Disturb me,disturbed."=======================================Acouple was having dinner at a fancy restaurant. As the food was served, the husband said,"The food looks delicious, let's eat."Wife: Honey.....you say a prayer before eating at home...

aussie_paul · aussie_paul

A rich Arab walks into a bar and is about to order a drink when he sees a guy close by wearing a Jewish cap, a prayer shawl and traditional locks of hair.He doesn't have to be Einstein to know this guy is Jewish.So he shouts over to the bartender so loudly that everyone can hear: 'drinks for everyone in here,...

aussie_paul · aussie_paul

Apologies to the Irish folks. Two Irishmen are traveling to Australia. Before they leave home, one of their dads gives them both a bit of advice:You watch them Aussie cab drivers. Theyll rob you blind. Dont you go paying them what they ask. You haggle.At the Sydney airport, the Irishmen catch a cab to t...

aussie_paul · aussie_paul

Bob called home one afternoon to see what his wife was making for dinner."Hello?" said the maid."Hi, it's me," said Bob. "Is madam near the phone?"..."No, Sir. She's upstairs in the bedroom with your friend Frank."After a brief pause, Bob said, "But I don't have a friend named Frank!""Yes you do. He'...

aussie_paul · aussie_paul

I ordered Chinese from a local place (won't name them) went to pick it up and as I was driving home, heard the bags rustling and moving!!!I thought what on earth is that? Has something gotten into the bag? I thought I could see a little pair of eyes peering out.I was driving so pulled over, I leaned forwar...

aussie_paul · aussie_paul

A new sign in the Bank Lobby reads:'Please note that this Bank is installing new Drive-through ATM machines enablingcustomers to withdraw cash without leaving their vehicles.Customers using this new facility are requested to use the procedures outlined belowwhen accessing their accounts.Af...

Southern Cruizer · Southern Cruizer

aussie_paul · aussie_paul

Southern Cruizer · Southern Cruizer

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	A SMALL GLIMMER OF HOPE IN THE GLOOM ! (Preview) A SMALL GLIMMER OF HOPE IN THE GLOOM !'Viagra' is now available in tea bags.It doesn't enhance your sexual performancebut it does stop your biscuit going soft. Ha ha.	aussie_paul	7	510	04:16 PM Jan 19, 2025 by 67HR
	THE HAIRCUT.. (closed) (Preview) "Blessed are those that can give without remembering, and take without forgetting.One day a florist went to a barber for a haircut. After the cut, he asked about his bill, and the barber replied, 'I cannot accept money from you, I'm doing community service this week.'The florist was pleased and left...	aussie_paul	21	957	08:44 PM Jan 17, 2025 by rmoor
	Thomas the cat.. (Preview) This old lady had lived at the head of the bight at the bottom of Australia for many years, her only companion was Thomas her cat. Each day they would climb down the path in the cliffs to the beach & walk up and back, beach combing for anything washed up over night. This was a daily event as sometimes log...	aussie_paul	0	193	08:13 PM Jan 17, 2025 by aussie_paul
	Dad's last words (Preview)	67HR	0	260	10:53 AM Jan 16, 2025 by 67HR
	Mistaken Identities (Preview) Some of the biggest mistaken identities are among so called intellectuals who have trouble remembering that they are not God.	Aussie1	6	968	10:38 AM Jan 15, 2025 by Are We Lost
	Sheep (Preview) How do you milk sheep? Bring out a new "I Phone" and charge $1000+ for it.	Aussie1	4	635	11:52 AM Jan 13, 2025 by Cupie
	Funny BUT unfortunately probably close to the truth!! 🙂.. (Preview) Funny BUT unfortunately probably close to the truth!! Read to the very end !!!The Squirrel and The GrasshopperPOPULAR VERSIONThe squirrel works hard in the withering heat all summer long, building and improving his house and laying up supplies for the winter.The grasshopper thinks he's a fool, a...	aussie_paul	3	352	07:29 PM Jan 12, 2025 by rmoor
	One for the Vegans (Preview) There is plenty of room for all God's Creatures, right next to the Mashed Potatoes...	Aussie1	2	276	07:20 PM Jan 12, 2025 by Are We Lost
	Can’t sleep (Preview)	rgren2	23	1477	08:52 AM Jan 10, 2025 by Possum3
	In the land of the Ents (Preview)	rgren2	2	608	11:28 AM Jan 9, 2025 by Aussie1
	A dog... (Preview)	aussie_paul	1	380	10:02 PM Jan 8, 2025 by Aussie1
	Best Slogan on a MAN's T-Shirt : (Preview) "Please Do Not Disturb me,disturbed."=======================================Acouple was having dinner at a fancy restaurant. As the food was served, the husband said,"The food looks delicious, let's eat."Wife: Honey.....you say a prayer before eating at home...	aussie_paul	0	401	04:22 PM Jan 7, 2025 by aussie_paul
	Why prejudice and bigotry are foolish..... (Preview) A rich Arab walks into a bar and is about to order a drink when he sees a guy close by wearing a Jewish cap, a prayer shawl and traditional locks of hair.He doesn't have to be Einstein to know this guy is Jewish.So he shouts over to the bartender so loudly that everyone can hear: 'drinks for everyone in here,...	aussie_paul	0	329	04:20 PM Jan 7, 2025 by aussie_paul
	Apologies to the Irish folks. 🙂 (Preview) Apologies to the Irish folks. Two Irishmen are traveling to Australia. Before they leave home, one of their dads gives them both a bit of advice:You watch them Aussie cab drivers. Theyll rob you blind. Dont you go paying them what they ask. You haggle.At the Sydney airport, the Irishmen catch a cab to t...	aussie_paul	0	293	04:19 PM Jan 7, 2025 by aussie_paul
	What for dinner.. (Preview) Bob called home one afternoon to see what his wife was making for dinner."Hello?" said the maid."Hi, it's me," said Bob. "Is madam near the phone?"..."No, Sir. She's upstairs in the bedroom with your friend Frank."After a brief pause, Bob said, "But I don't have a friend named Frank!""Yes you do. He'...	aussie_paul	0	310	04:14 PM Jan 7, 2025 by aussie_paul
	* Beware **.. (Preview) I ordered Chinese from a local place (won't name them) went to pick it up and as I was driving home, heard the bags rustling and moving!!!I thought what on earth is that? Has something gotten into the bag? I thought I could see a little pair of eyes peering out.I was driving so pulled over, I leaned forwar...	aussie_paul	0	765	04:03 PM Jan 7, 2025 by aussie_paul
	A new sign.. (Preview) A new sign in the Bank Lobby reads:'Please note that this Bank is installing new Drive-through ATM machines enablingcustomers to withdraw cash without leaving their vehicles.Customers using this new facility are requested to use the procedures outlined belowwhen accessing their accounts.Af...	aussie_paul	0	300	04:00 PM Jan 7, 2025 by aussie_paul
	Rough Neighbourhood (Preview)	Southern Cruizer	0	285	03:13 PM Jan 7, 2025 by Southern Cruizer
	Tattoos.. (Preview)	aussie_paul	0	565	12:01 PM Jan 7, 2025 by aussie_paul
	Can't decide (Preview)	Southern Cruizer	3	518	09:35 AM Jan 7, 2025 by peter67
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