Just Joking

aussie_paul · aussie_paul

Shortly it will become compulsory for senior citizens to carry not only their ID, but also their insurance documents, their prescription list, a compact version of their medical file, the statement declaring if they want to be resuscitated after a heart attack, stroke, etc. etc. Consequently, a l...

aussie_paul · aussie_paul

A professional dietitian was lecturing in front of a group of people who wanted to lose weight.The food we eat is so bad for us, that it will still hurt our health several years down the road, she said.Sugary drinks eat up the lining of our stomach, processed food is full of chemicals, meat is full of pres...

aussie_paul · aussie_paul

Her Well-Kept Secret...A man and woman had been married for more than 60 years. They had shared everything. They had talked about everything. They had kept no secrets from each other except that the little old woman had a locked chest on top of her closet that she had cautioned her husband never to open...

aussie_paul · aussie_paul

67HR · 67HR

aussie_paul · aussie_paul

aussie_paul · aussie_paul

PRICELESS!1+ 2 = 3Until a child tells you what they are thinking, we can't even begin to imagine how their mind is working....Little Zachary was doing very badly in maths.His parents had tried everything...tutors, mentors, flash cards, special learning centres.In short, everything they could t...

aussie_paul · aussie_paul

I was standing at the bar at the RSL one night, minding my own business.This quite hefty, very plain looking woman came up behind me, grabbed my arse and said,"You are very cute. Do you have a phone number?"I said, "Yes, do you have a pen?"She said, "Yes, Ive got a pen".I said, "Then you better get back int...

aussie_paul · aussie_paul

The well to do British lady on safari & takes her little Daschund dog with her. Well , one day the wanders off & gets lost.Sitting in the middle of the savannah contemplating his fate he notices a lion approaching . What to do , his mind raced.The lion puzzled at what this strange looking anima...

aussie_paul · aussie_paul

Two friends had gone hunting. Ahead they saw a lion. The first man shot and missed but the lion had not realized where the men were. The second guy shot too. He missed too.This time the lion realized the place of the men and moved towards them. One of the men immediately took off his boots and put on sports s...

aussie_paul · aussie_paul

lol

aussie_paul · aussie_paul

A married couple were in a terrible accident in which the womans face was severely burned. The doctor told the husband that they couldnt graft any skin from her body because she was too thin. So the husband offered to donate some of his own skin.However, the only skin on his body that the doctor felt was s...

67HR · 67HR

aussie_paul · aussie_paul

COLONOSCOPY REPORTDuring my check-up I asked the Doctor,"Do you think I'll live a long and healthy life then?He replied, "I doubt it somehow. Mercury is in Uranus right now."I said, "I don't go in for any of that astrology nonsense."He replied, "Neither do I. My thermometer just broke."

aussie_paul · aussie_paul

Victor was 4 years old and was staying with his grandfather for a few days.He'd been playing outside with the other kids, when he came into the house and asked,'Grandpa, what's that called when two people sleep in the same bedroom and one is on top of the other?'His Grandpa was a little taken aback, but h...

rgren2 · rgren2

aussie_paul · aussie_paul

67HR · 67HR

dorian · dorian

https://theshovel.com.au/2025/02/17/graffiti-vandal-splits-infinitive-in-latest-anti-semantic-attack/

aussie_paul · aussie_paul

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	Had to share it.. (Preview) Shortly it will become compulsory for senior citizens to carry not only their ID, but also their insurance documents, their prescription list, a compact version of their medical file, the statement declaring if they want to be resuscitated after a heart attack, stroke, etc. etc. Consequently, a l...	aussie_paul	0	685	01:11 PM Mar 22, 2025 by aussie_paul
	A professional.. (Preview) A professional dietitian was lecturing in front of a group of people who wanted to lose weight.The food we eat is so bad for us, that it will still hurt our health several years down the road, she said.Sugary drinks eat up the lining of our stomach, processed food is full of chemicals, meat is full of pres...	aussie_paul	0	651	11:20 AM Mar 21, 2025 by aussie_paul
	Her Well-Kept Secret.. (Preview) Her Well-Kept Secret...A man and woman had been married for more than 60 years. They had shared everything. They had talked about everything. They had kept no secrets from each other except that the little old woman had a locked chest on top of her closet that she had cautioned her husband never to open...	aussie_paul	0	599	05:26 PM Mar 20, 2025 by aussie_paul
	Humpty Dumpty.. (Preview)	aussie_paul	6	977	02:15 PM Mar 19, 2025 by Possum3
	To be sure, To be sure. (Preview)	67HR	0	545	10:48 AM Mar 17, 2025 by 67HR
	Boobs.. (Preview)	aussie_paul	0	577	07:09 PM Mar 15, 2025 by aussie_paul
	The Wonders of a Catholic Education! (Preview) PRICELESS!1+ 2 = 3Until a child tells you what they are thinking, we can't even begin to imagine how their mind is working....Little Zachary was doing very badly in maths.His parents had tried everything...tutors, mentors, flash cards, special learning centres.In short, everything they could t...	aussie_paul	0	573	02:07 PM Mar 13, 2025 by aussie_paul
	Over 70s jokes (Preview) I was standing at the bar at the RSL one night, minding my own business.This quite hefty, very plain looking woman came up behind me, grabbed my arse and said,"You are very cute. Do you have a phone number?"I said, "Yes, do you have a pen?"She said, "Yes, Ive got a pen".I said, "Then you better get back int...	aussie_paul	0	555	02:03 PM Mar 13, 2025 by aussie_paul
	Daschund dog.. (Preview) The well to do British lady on safari & takes her little Daschund dog with her. Well , one day the wanders off & gets lost.Sitting in the middle of the savannah contemplating his fate he notices a lion approaching . What to do , his mind raced.The lion puzzled at what this strange looking anima...	aussie_paul	0	509	07:01 PM Mar 12, 2025 by aussie_paul
	Lion Hunting.. (Preview) Two friends had gone hunting. Ahead they saw a lion. The first man shot and missed but the lion had not realized where the men were. The second guy shot too. He missed too.This time the lion realized the place of the men and moved towards them. One of the men immediately took off his boots and put on sports s...	aussie_paul	0	523	10:17 PM Mar 11, 2025 by aussie_paul
	Hurdle.. (Preview) lol	aussie_paul	0	540	04:06 PM Mar 11, 2025 by aussie_paul
	A married couple.. (Preview) A married couple were in a terrible accident in which the womans face was severely burned. The doctor told the husband that they couldnt graft any skin from her body because she was too thin. So the husband offered to donate some of his own skin.However, the only skin on his body that the doctor felt was s...	aussie_paul	0	457	02:54 PM Mar 11, 2025 by aussie_paul
	Fuel station makes a fortune (Preview)	67HR	3	588	07:01 AM Mar 11, 2025 by Magnarc
	COLONOSCOPY REPORT.. (Preview) COLONOSCOPY REPORTDuring my check-up I asked the Doctor,"Do you think I'll live a long and healthy life then?He replied, "I doubt it somehow. Mercury is in Uranus right now."I said, "I don't go in for any of that astrology nonsense."He replied, "Neither do I. My thermometer just broke."	aussie_paul	0	604	03:55 PM Mar 4, 2025 by aussie_paul
	Victor was 4 years old.. (Preview) Victor was 4 years old and was staying with his grandfather for a few days.He'd been playing outside with the other kids, when he came into the house and asked,'Grandpa, what's that called when two people sleep in the same bedroom and one is on top of the other?'His Grandpa was a little taken aback, but h...	aussie_paul	0	647	03:34 PM Feb 28, 2025 by aussie_paul
	Sporting career choice. (Preview)	rgren2	2	800	04:02 PM Feb 25, 2025 by Southern Cruizer
	Paddy again.. (Preview)	aussie_paul	0	694	01:25 PM Feb 22, 2025 by aussie_paul
	Worms (Preview)	67HR	0	612	07:45 PM Feb 21, 2025 by 67HR
	Graffiti Vandal Splits Infinitive in Latest Anti-Semantic Attack (Preview) https://theshovel.com.au/2025/02/17/graffiti-vandal-splits-infinitive-in-latest-anti-semantic-attack/	dorian	1	668	12:30 PM Feb 20, 2025 by Dick0
	air con.. (Preview)	aussie_paul	6	959	05:53 PM Feb 18, 2025 by dogbox
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