Just Joking

Gundog · Gundog

1. Stand up halfway through the movie and yell loudly, "Wait! Where is Harry Potter?" 2. Block the entrance to the theatre while screaming, "YOU.....SHALL....NOT..... PASS!" 3. Ask everyone around you if they think Gandalf went to Hogwarts. 4. Finish off every one of Elrond's lines with "Mis...

aussie_paul · aussie_paul

If you've ever worked for a boss who reacts before getting the facts andthinking things through, you will love this!Arcelor-Mittal Steel, feeling it was time for a shakeup, hired a new CEO.The new boss was determined to rid the company of all slackers.On a tour of the facilities, the CEO noticed a guy...

aussie_paul · aussie_paul

rgren2 · rgren2

rgren2 · rgren2

A man in a bar starts talking to a prostitute... He says "how much for a hand job?" She says, it's $250. He says,"$250 for a lousy hand job? That's crazy! She says, "Honey, follow me" and takes him outside. "See that Ferrari? I bought that Ferrari just with money from hand jobs. I give the best in the world...

aussie_paul · aussie_paul

PERFECTIONA man walks out to the street and catches a taxi just going by. Hegets into the taxi and the cabbie says, Perfect timing. Youre justlike Frank.Passenger: Who?Cabbie: Frank Feldman. Hes a guy who did everything right all thetime. Like my coming along when you needed a cab, things happened l...

aussie_paul · aussie_paul

A man is stranded on a desert island for 10 years.One day a beautiful girl swims to shore in a wetsuit.Man: "Hi! I am so happy to see you."Girl: "Hi! It seems like you've been here a long time. How long has it been since you've had a cigarette?"Man: "It's been 10 years!"...With this information the girl un...

aussie_paul · aussie_paul

Paddy Murphy suspects that Mrs Murphy is doing the jiggerypokery with Declan O'Toole from next door.Deciding to catch her at it, Paddy tells her he's working late when he leaves in the morning.That evening Paddy was hiding in the bushes over the road from his house, and sure enough, shortly after dar...

Southern Cruizer · Southern Cruizer

aussie_paul · aussie_paul

aussie_paul · aussie_paul

What is good about Australia by a Yank !!This Bloke Sure Is Spot On with His readings.David Mason is a Writer, a Professor, and a Poet Laureate from Colorado, USAThere's a lot to admire about Australia, especially if you're a visiting American, says David Mason.More often than you might expect, Aust...

aussie_paul · aussie_paul

SCHOOL - 1950s v 2016Scenario :Johnny and Mark get into a fight after school.1950s - Crowd gathers. Mark wins. Johnny and Mark shake hands and end up best friends.2016 - Police called, and they arrest Johnny and Mark & charge them with assault.Both expelled even though Johnny started it.Both ch...

aussie_paul · aussie_paul

Woman comes home and tells her husband, "Remember those headaches I've been having all these years? Well, they're gone.""No more headaches?" The husband ...asks, "What happened?"His wife replies, "Margie referred me to a hypnotist. He told me to stand in front of a mirror, stare at myself and repe...

Dick0 · Dick0

My apologies if these have been posted in the past. -- Edited by Dick0 on Saturday 2nd of August 2025 09:43:46 PM

aussie_paul · aussie_paul

The Wife wanted to serve her guests mushroom-smothered steak,But she had no mushrooms and no time to buy them.I suggested, "Why don't you go pick some of the mushrooms that are growing wild down by the stream?"No, She said, some wild mushrooms are poisonous.""Well, I see squirrels eating them and th...

aussie_paul · aussie_paul

An Australian, and Englishman and an American are on a cruise with their wives.Sitting at breakfast the first morning, the Englishman sets our to impress his neighbours with his affection for his wife.He says, "Would you please pass the honey, Honey?"With this the American chimes in, "Can you pass...

aussie_paul · aussie_paul

An Australian, and Englishman and an American are on a cruise with their wives.Sitting at breakfast the first morning, the Englishman sets our to impress his neighbours with his affection for his wife.He says, "Would you please pass the honey, Honey?"With this the American chimes in, "Can you pass...

Burt65 · Burt65

-- Edited by Burt65 on Saturday 2nd of August 2025 11:10:56 AM

Burt65 · Burt65

Magnarc · Magnarc

In the garden of Eden sat Adam, Gently stroking his madam, Great was his mirth, For he knew that on earth, There were only two balls, and he had 'em.

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	Things [NOT] to do when seeing Lord of the Rings (Preview) 1. Stand up halfway through the movie and yell loudly, "Wait! Where is Harry Potter?" 2. Block the entrance to the theatre while screaming, "YOU.....SHALL....NOT..... PASS!" 3. Ask everyone around you if they think Gandalf went to Hogwarts. 4. Finish off every one of Elrond's lines with "Mis...	Gundog	0	29	11:18 AM Aug 15, 2025 by Gundog
	The Lazy Worker.. (Preview) If you've ever worked for a boss who reacts before getting the facts andthinking things through, you will love this!Arcelor-Mittal Steel, feeling it was time for a shakeup, hired a new CEO.The new boss was determined to rid the company of all slackers.On a tour of the facilities, the CEO noticed a guy...	aussie_paul	0	162	08:44 PM Aug 13, 2025 by aussie_paul
	Trust... (Preview)	aussie_paul	7	606	08:59 AM Aug 11, 2025 by Magnarc
	EV (Preview)	rgren2	1	248	08:51 AM Aug 11, 2025 by Magnarc
	OK (Preview) A man in a bar starts talking to a prostitute... He says "how much for a hand job?" She says, it's $250. He says,"$250 for a lousy hand job? That's crazy! She says, "Honey, follow me" and takes him outside. "See that Ferrari? I bought that Ferrari just with money from hand jobs. I give the best in the world...	rgren2	0	210	04:45 PM Aug 10, 2025 by rgren2
	This is beyond classic! .... Enjoy! (Preview) PERFECTIONA man walks out to the street and catches a taxi just going by. Hegets into the taxi and the cabbie says, Perfect timing. Youre justlike Frank.Passenger: Who?Cabbie: Frank Feldman. Hes a guy who did everything right all thetime. Like my coming along when you needed a cab, things happened l...	aussie_paul	1	331	08:14 AM Aug 9, 2025 by Magnarc
	Desert island.. (Preview) A man is stranded on a desert island for 10 years.One day a beautiful girl swims to shore in a wetsuit.Man: "Hi! I am so happy to see you."Girl: "Hi! It seems like you've been here a long time. How long has it been since you've had a cigarette?"Man: "It's been 10 years!"...With this information the girl un...	aussie_paul	0	246	09:12 PM Aug 7, 2025 by aussie_paul
	Paddy again.. (Preview) Paddy Murphy suspects that Mrs Murphy is doing the jiggerypokery with Declan O'Toole from next door.Deciding to catch her at it, Paddy tells her he's working late when he leaves in the morning.That evening Paddy was hiding in the bushes over the road from his house, and sure enough, shortly after dar...	aussie_paul	0	212	09:09 PM Aug 7, 2025 by aussie_paul
	Boots (Preview)	Southern Cruizer	1	315	07:47 AM Aug 7, 2025 by Magnarc
	More funnies.. (Preview)	aussie_paul	0	255	12:07 PM Aug 6, 2025 by aussie_paul
	What is good about Australia by a Yank !! (Preview) What is good about Australia by a Yank !!This Bloke Sure Is Spot On with His readings.David Mason is a Writer, a Professor, and a Poet Laureate from Colorado, USAThere's a lot to admire about Australia, especially if you're a visiting American, says David Mason.More often than you might expect, Aust...	aussie_paul	4	292	11:26 AM Aug 6, 2025 by Ineedabiggerboat
	SCHOOL - 1950s v 2016.. (Preview) SCHOOL - 1950s v 2016Scenario :Johnny and Mark get into a fight after school.1950s - Crowd gathers. Mark wins. Johnny and Mark shake hands and end up best friends.2016 - Police called, and they arrest Johnny and Mark & charge them with assault.Both expelled even though Johnny started it.Both ch...	aussie_paul	0	222	10:11 PM Aug 5, 2025 by aussie_paul
	Headache.. (Preview) Woman comes home and tells her husband, "Remember those headaches I've been having all these years? Well, they're gone.""No more headaches?" The husband ...asks, "What happened?"His wife replies, "Margie referred me to a hypnotist. He told me to stand in front of a mirror, stare at myself and repe...	aussie_paul	0	311	07:00 PM Aug 3, 2025 by aussie_paul
	More Just Joking (Preview) My apologies if these have been posted in the past. -- Edited by Dick0 on Saturday 2nd of August 2025 09:43:46 PM	Dick0	0	334	09:41 PM Aug 2, 2025 by Dick0
	THE MUSHROOMS (Preview) The Wife wanted to serve her guests mushroom-smothered steak,But she had no mushrooms and no time to buy them.I suggested, "Why don't you go pick some of the mushrooms that are growing wild down by the stream?"No, She said, some wild mushrooms are poisonous.""Well, I see squirrels eating them and th...	aussie_paul	0	272	06:24 PM Aug 2, 2025 by aussie_paul
	Dining etiquette.. (Preview) An Australian, and Englishman and an American are on a cruise with their wives.Sitting at breakfast the first morning, the Englishman sets our to impress his neighbours with his affection for his wife.He says, "Would you please pass the honey, Honey?"With this the American chimes in, "Can you pass...	aussie_paul	0	231	06:23 PM Aug 2, 2025 by aussie_paul
	Dining etiquette.. (Preview) An Australian, and Englishman and an American are on a cruise with their wives.Sitting at breakfast the first morning, the Englishman sets our to impress his neighbours with his affection for his wife.He says, "Would you please pass the honey, Honey?"With this the American chimes in, "Can you pass...	aussie_paul	0	218	06:17 PM Aug 2, 2025 by aussie_paul
	School Play (Preview) -- Edited by Burt65 on Saturday 2nd of August 2025 11:10:56 AM	Burt65	0	286	11:10 AM Aug 2, 2025 by Burt65
	Vegan (Preview)	Burt65	0	242	11:08 AM Aug 2, 2025 by Burt65
	Adam. (Preview) In the garden of Eden sat Adam, Gently stroking his madam, Great was his mirth, For he knew that on earth, There were only two balls, and he had 'em.	Magnarc	3	387	08:29 AM Aug 2, 2025 by Burt65
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