|
The State We're In
(Preview)
. New South Wales A senior citizen drove his brand new Holden Senator out of the dealership Taking off down the road, he pushed it to 120 kph, enjoying the power of the car .. Amazing, he thought as he flew down the F3, pushing the pedal even more. Looking in his rear view mirror, he saw a highway patrol...
|
Hurls
|
0
|
894
|
|
|
|
|
Golf Lessons....
(Preview)
A father put his 3 year old daughter to bed, told her a story and listened to her prayers which ended by saying, " God bless Mommy, God bless Daddy, God bless Grandma and good-bye Grandpa." The father asked, 'Why did you say good-bye Grandpa?' The little girl said, "I don't know daddy, i...
|
aussie_paul
|
1
|
799
|
|
|
|
|
THREE VIRGINS;;
(Preview)
Three virgin sisters were all getting married within a short time period. Mum was a bit worried about how their sex life would get started and made them all promise to send a postcard from the honeymoon with a few words on their first impressions The first girl sent a card from Hawaii two days aft...
|
justcruisin01
|
0
|
898
|
|
|
|
|
SCHNAUZER
(Preview)
My wife found out that our dog (a Schnauzer) could hardly hear, so she took it to the veterinarian.The vet found that the problem was ear wax and hair clogging the dog's ears.He cleaned both ears and the dog could then hear fine.The vet then proceeded to tell Andrea that, if she wanted to keep this from re...
|
Big Gorilla
|
1
|
844
|
|
|
|
|
Honeymoon....
(Preview)
A guy out on the golf course takes a high speed hit right in the crotch. Writhing in agony, he falls to the ground. As soon as he could manage, he took himself to the doctor. He said 'How bad is it doc? I'm going on my honeymoon next week and my fiancée is still a virgin - in every way' The doctor told him, 'I'll...
|
Vic41
|
0
|
719
|
|
|
|
|
Watch those Peas
(Preview)
An old woman was fronting the Judge. The judge says, "I am going to give you 6 months jail for each of the peaches in that can you have stolen" The old woman's husband puts his hand up and says, "excuse me judge, and she took a can of peas"
|
Kendo
|
0
|
797
|
|
|
|
|
Grins and Snickers..........
(Preview)
Grins and Snickers I was in the six item express lane at the store quietly fuming. Completely ignoring the sign, the woman ahead of me had slipped into the check-out line pushing a cart piled high with groceries. Imagine my delight when the cashier beckoned the woman to come forward looked into the c...
|
aussie_paul
|
0
|
1049
|
|
|
|
|
Positions....
(Preview)
|
Vic41
|
0
|
822
|
|
|
|
|
The Three Roses....
(Preview)
A socially active woman tells her plastic surgeon that she wanted some very personal surgery to a part of her body to tighten things up and improve the parts appearance. Out of embarrassment she insisted that the surgery be kept a secret and the surgeon agreed. Awakening from the anesthesia afte...
|
Vic41
|
0
|
713
|
|
|
|
|
Conquer The Scots
(Preview)
CONQUER THE SCOTS... Edward Longshanks (Edward I of England) comes to Scotland to conquer the Scots. He brings 4,000 men with him. As he nears the battlefield, there suddenly appears a solitary figure on the crest of the hill, a short, ginger-haired guy in a kilt. 'Hammer O the Scots?' yells the wee Sc...
|
Gunsondeck
|
2
|
1012
|
|
|
|
|
Home Schooled
(Preview)
Most of our generation was HOME SCHOOLED in many ways. 1. My mother taught me: TO APPRECIATE A JOB WELL DONE. "If you're going to kill each other, do it outside. I just finished cleaning the house." 2. My mother taught me: RELIGION. "You better pray that stain will come out of the carpe...
|
Redlander
|
0
|
790
|
|
|
|
|
Ths Pervert
(Preview)
Telephone rings, woman answers. Pervert, breathing heavily, says, "I bet you have a tight arse with no hair?" Woman replies, "Yes, I have. He's watching the rugby.... Who shall I say is calling?" K.J.
|
kiwijims
|
1
|
853
|
|
|
|
|
Chinese Divorce
(Preview)
Chinese couple get divorced, she went back to PEKING and he went back to WANKENG
|
Cowboy7307
|
0
|
759
|
|
|
|
|
Yellow Traffic Light....
(Preview)
The Light Turned Yellow The light turned yellow, just in front of him. He did the right thing, stopping at the crosswalk, even though he could have beaten the red light by accelerating through the intersection. The tailgating woman was furious and honked her horn, screaming in frustration, as sh...
|
Vic41
|
0
|
862
|
|
|
|
|
Chinese Hurrymoon
(Preview)
Chinese Hurrymoon A young Chinese couple get married. She's a virgin & they are both waiters in a smart London Chinese Restaurant... The truth be told, he is a virgin too, but "She Does Not Know That". On their wedding night, she cowers naked under the sheets, as her husband undress...
|
Ole_Grizzly
|
0
|
923
|
|
|
|
|
speed hog
(Preview)
|
kiwijims
|
0
|
873
|
|
|
|
|
Croc family album
(Preview)
|
kiwijims
|
0
|
760
|
|
|
|
|
AFL Grand Final...
(Preview)
Bruce had two of the best tickets for the Australian Football League Grand Final. As he sits down, another man comes along and asks if anyone is sitting in the seat next to him.. "No", Bruce says, "the seat is empty." "This is incredible!" said the man, "who i...
|
Vic41
|
0
|
767
|
|
|
|
|
Train Travel.....
(Preview)
A man and a woman who had never met before, but who were both married to other people, found themselves assigned to the same sleeping room on a transcontinental train. Though initially embarrassed and uneasy over sharing a room, they were both very tired and fell asleep quickly, he in the upp...
|
Vic41
|
2
|
888
|
|
|
|
|
Marriage In Heaven....
(Preview)
On their way to the church to get married, a young Catholic couple were involved in a fatal car accident. Being good Catholics the young couple find themselves sitting outside the Pearly Gates waiting for St. Peter to process them into Heaven. While waiting, they begin to wonder: could they poss...
|
Vic41
|
0
|
763
|
|
|
