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Let Him Dig.....Women are wonderfull.
(Preview)
An old man and woman were married for many years, even though they hated each other. When they had a confrontation, screaming and yelling could be heard deep into the night. The old man would shout, 'When I die, I will dig my way up and out of the grave and come back and haunt you for the rest of your life!' Ne...
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TRUE BLUE AUSIE
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0
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930
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Could this be my long lost son?????
(Preview)
Just looking at Jon and my Avatar's...........Could this be my long lost son????
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Vic41
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7
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1210
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Wedding Night
(Preview)
Paul and Mary get married but couldn't afford a honeymoon -so they go back to Paul's Mom and Dad's house for their first night together. In the morning Johnny - Paul's little brother - gets up and has his breakfast. As he is going out of the door to go to school - he asks his mom if Paul and Mary are up yet....
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Basil Faulty
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0
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1027
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swine flu again.
(Preview)
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Xtrail51
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9
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1366
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To My Dog, Cat & Visitors
(Preview)
The following was found posted very low on a refrigerator door. Dear Dogs and Cats: The dishes with the paw prints are yours and contain your food. The other dishes are mine and contain my food. Placing a paw print in the middle of my plate and food does not stake a claim for it becoming your food and d...
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Vic41
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0
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1009
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WALKING EAGLE
(Preview)
On a recent trip to the U.S.A., Prime Minister Kevin Rudd was invited to address a major gathering of the American Indian Nations in Kitimat, B.C., due to his experiences in handling the Australian Indigenous situation inAustralia. He spoke for almost an hour on his ideas for increasing every Firs...
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Wombat 280
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3
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1069
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Signs Will Do That
(Preview)
ACTUAL AUSTRALIAN COURT DOCKET 12659 ---CASE OF THE PREGNANT LADY A lady about 8 months pregnant got on a bus. She noticed the man opposite her was smiling at her. She immediately moved to another seat.. This time the smile turned into a grin, so she moved again. The man seemed more amused. Whe...
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Wombat 280
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3
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1098
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GLOBAL FACTS ABOUT SEX
(Preview)
Global Facts . . . At Any Given Moment: FACT:79,000,000 people are engaged in sex - right now. FACT:58,000,000 are kissing. FACT: 37,000,000 are relaxing after having sex. FACT: 1 old timer is reading emails. You hang in there, Sunshine . . .
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sgntbilko
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8
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1264
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GETTING OLDER
(Preview)
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Mike47
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0
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1011
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Sunday paper...............
(Preview)
Subject: FW: The Sunday Paper The Sunday Paper Subject: FW: The Sunday PaperThe Sunday Paper For all of us who are seniors - for all of you who know seniors - And for all of you who will be seniors. It pays to be able to laugh about it when you are! And, speaking of senior moments: "WHERE is my SUNDAY pap...
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Xtrail51
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3
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1168
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Solution to the Middle East Problems
(Preview)
Three men - an Australian farmer, Osama bin Laden and a Biker are all walking together one day. They come across a lantern and a Genie pops out of it. 'I will give each of you one wish, which is three wishes in total', says the Genie. The Australian says, 'I am a farmer and my son will also f...
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Basil Faulty
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1
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976
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little johnny
(Preview)
One day the teacher walked to the back of the room where Johnny was, and he had his hand down his pants. The Teacher asked, "Johnny, what are you doing?" Then, Johnny said, "It hurts down there." "Well then, you need to go to the nurse and see if you can go home", said the t...
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Pickles
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0
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826
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Little Johny
(Preview)
Little Johnnie's neighbor had a baby.. Unfortunately, the baby was born without ears. When mother and new baby came home from the hospital, Johnnie's family was invited over to see the baby. Before they left their house, Little Johnnie's dad had a talk with him and explained that the baby had no ears...
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sgntbilko
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0
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810
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kids
(Preview)
A nursery school teacher was delivering a station wagon full of kids home one day when a fire truck zoomed past. Sitting in the front seat of the fire truck was a Dalmatian dog. The children fell to discussing the dog's duties. "They use him to keep crowds back," said one youngster. "No...
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Libby
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0
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726
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and then the fight started
(Preview)
My wife sat down on the couch next to me as I was flipping channels. She asked, Whats on TV? I said, Dust. And then the fight started My wife was hinting about what she wanted for our upcoming nniversary. She said, I want something shiny that goes from to 150 in about 3 seconds. I bought her a set of scales. A...
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Libby
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0
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1046
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Blonde in First Class
(Preview)
On a plane bound for New York the flight attendant approached a blonde sitting in the first class section and requested that she move to economy since she did not have a first class ticket. The blonde replied "I'm blonde, I'm beautiful, I'm going to New York and I'm not moving." Not wanting t...
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Pickles
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0
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1199
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unlucky golfer
(Preview)
a nun goes to confession and says forgive me father for i have sinned. i am guilty of using bad language. the priest says tell me how it happened my child the nun says well i was playing golf and i hit an amazing tee shot. but the ball hit a seagull and only went 40 yards. i see said the priest is this when you swo...
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Pickles
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2
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863
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Gopher Granny
(Preview)
Ethel was a bit of a demon in her gopher, and loved to charge around the nursing home, taking corners on one wheel and getting up to maximum speed on the long corridors. Because the poor woman was one sandwich short of a picnic the other residents tolerated her and some of them actually joined in. One day E...
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Cruising Granny
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1
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1363
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4 PALL BEARERS
(Preview)
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sgntbilko
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2
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1154
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Some Important Laws Which Newton Forgot to State
(Preview)
LAW OF QUEUE: If you change queues, the one you have left will start to move faster than the one you are in now. ********** LAW OF TELEPHONE: When you dial a wrong number, you never get an engaged one. ********** LAW OF MECHANICAL REPAIR : After your hands become coated with grease, your nose will begin to...
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whoppa
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0
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978
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