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past it
(Preview)
I think you know when your getting old. I was watching porn the other night and found myself thinking " that bloody bed looks comfy "
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twobob
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0
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897
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grumpy
(Preview)
The seven dwarfs go to the Vatican, and because they are the seven dwarfs, they are immediately ushered in to see the Pope. Grumpy leads the pack. 'Grumpy, my son,' says the Pope, 'What can I do for you?' Grumpy asks, 'Excuse me your Excellency, but are there any dwarf nuns in Rome ?' The Pope wrinkles his...
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twobob
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1
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969
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Two Little Old Ladies
(Preview)
Two little old ladies were sitting on a park bench outside the local town hall Where a flower show was in progress. The thin one leaned over and said, 'Life is so boring. We never have any fun any more. For $10 I'd take my clothes off and streak through that stupid flower show!' 'You're on!' said the o...
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Firefly
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0
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1007
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How To Stay Awake At Meetings
(Preview)
How To Stay Awake At Meetings This may help all you hard workers, dogged by meetings and seminars..........How to stay awake at meetings Do you keep falling asleep in meetings and seminars? What about those long and boring conference calls? Here's a way to change all of that. 1. Before (or during) you...
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jimricho
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0
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1822
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More Airline Stuff
(Preview)
P = The problem logged by the pilot. S = The solution logged by the mechanic. P: Left inside main tire almost needs replacement. S: Almost replaced left inside main tire. P: Test flight OK, except auto-land very rough. S: Auto-land not installed on this aircraft. P: No. 2 propeller seeping prop fluid....
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Disco Duck
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0
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876
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Xmas Lights, (my house on the right)
(Preview)
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Firefly
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2
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1012
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North West Airlines Pilot's Guide to the Flight Deck
(Preview)
(News Item: NW Airlines flight overflies destination by more than 100 n. miles.)
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jimricho
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1
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905
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Exchanges Between Pilots and Control Towers.
(Preview)
.hmmessage P {
PADDING-BOTTOM: 0px; MARGIN: 0px; PADDING-LEFT: 0px; PADDING-RIGHT: 0px; PADDING-TOP: 0px
}
BODY.hmmessage {
FONT-FAMILY: Verdana; FONT-SIZE: 10pt
}
Tower: "Delta 351, you have traffic at 10 o'clock, 6 miles!" Delta 351: "Give us another hint! We have...
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Firefly
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1
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3124
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Al-Gebra
(Preview)
Implements of Math Destruction At New York's Kennedy airport today an individual, later discovered to be a public school teacher, was arrested trying to board a flight while in possession of a ruler, a protractor, a square, a slide rule, and a calculator. The Attorney General believes the man is a me...
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Disco Duck
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0
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782
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Butt dust!!!
(Preview)
What, you ask, is 'Butt dust'? Read on and you'll discover the joy in it! These have to be original and genuine. No adult is this creative!! JACK (age 3) was watching his Mom breast-feeding his new baby sister. After a while he asked: 'Mom why have you got two? Is one for hot and one for cold milk?' MELANI...
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Basil Faulty
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1
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953
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Another blonde at work
(Preview)
Leaving Work Early Three girls all worked in the same office with the same female boss. Each day, they noticed the boss left work early. One day, the girls decided that, when the boss left, they would leave right behind her. After all, she never called or came back to work, so how would she know they we...
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clazandaza
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0
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729
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Age Calculator
(Preview)
A little working for the brain -Simple to see how it's done really!!Don't tell me your age; you probably would tell a falsehood anyway-but the Hershey Man will know!YOUR AGE BY CHOCOLATE MATH This is pretty neat. DON'T CHEAT BY SCROLLING DOWN FIRST! It takes less than a minute . Work this out as you read...
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Gary and Kerry
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1
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1073
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Dr Epstein
(Preview)
Dr. Epstein was a renowned physician who earned his undergraduate, graduate, and medical degrees in his home town and then left for Manhattan, where he quickly rose to the top of his field. Soon he was invited to deliver a significant paper, at a conference, coincidentally held in his home town....
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jimricho
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0
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814
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A Ghost Story
(Preview)
This happened just outside a little town in Raleigh, Newfoundland, and even though it sounds like an Alfred Hitch**** tale, it's absolutely true! Charlie was on the side of the road hitchhiking on a very dark night in the middle of a terrible rain storm. There was no moon, it was pitch black, and there w...
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Firefly
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0
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993
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New Exercise Programme
(Preview)
New exercise routine. If you're over 40, you might want to take it easy at first, then do it faster as you become more proficient. It may be too strenuous for some . Always consult your doctor before starting any exercise program! SCROLL DOWN... NOW SCROLL UP.. That's enough for the first day. Great job...
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Firefly
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0
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886
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Very Clever
(Preview)
WOMEN WHO KNOW THEIR PLACE Barbara Walters, of 20/20, did a story on gender roles inKabul,Afghanistan, several years before the Afghan conflict. She noted that women customarily walked five paces behind their husbands. She recently returned to Kabul and observed that women still walk behind...
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Disco Duck
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0
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851
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You May Have Seen Before
(Preview)
Working people frequently ask retired people what they do to make their days interesting. Well, for example, the other day my wife and I went into town and went into a shop. We were only in there for about 5 minutes. When we came out, there was a cop writing out a parking ticket. We went up to him and said,...
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Disco Duck
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0
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901
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Mums worst nightmare
(Preview)
Dear mum, I am writing you this note to say that I haven't been honest to you lately. I have a boyfriend, his name is Dragon and he lives in a trailer in the woods he wears biker clothes and deals Ecstasy. I am moving in with him and I am four months pregnant. His friends will come over all the time so I can get a l...
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Gary and Kerry
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0
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902
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just plain funny
(Preview)
Tampax are changing their design they are replacing the string with a piece of tinsel .... This is for the Christmas period only!
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twobob
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1
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764
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Replacement Windows.
(Preview)
Last year I replaced all the windows in my house with that expensive double-pane energy efficient kind. Today, I got a call from the contractor who installed them. He was complaining that the work had been completed a whole year ago and I still hadn't paid for them. Hellloooo,....... just because I'm...
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Firefly
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1
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1072
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